How do I politely tell a guest to not leave the bathroom so disgusting?

[Tamara-and-Chris0]

We have a couple staying in a private room in our house; the bathroom is shared with us. Most guests are respectful and, although they don’t have the same cleanliness standards as us, are only guilty of a little toothpaste left in the sink or a towel askew.

These two, on the other hand, are gross. And I cannot figure out how to ask them to be cleaner without giving away how disgusted I am. I want the behavior to change, but I don’t want to be rude, embarrass them, or put them on the defensive. Any ideas?

The offenses:
- Leaving feces on the toilet rim and in the bowl (there’s a brush right next to the toilet)
- Using baby powder (for what?) and getting it all over the floor and caked onto the bath mat when combined with water
- Leaving unidentifiable matter in the shower tub and drain catch

[Sarah977]

@Tamara-and-Chris0  What would be the point of asking them to be cleaner? They are already aware that they are sharing the bathroom with you and that obviously doesn't matter to them in terms of leaving it clean for you to use. 

If you really want to ask them to be cleaner in there, just say " We'd really appreciate it if you tried to clean up a bit better after using the bathroom, since, as you're aware, you are sharing it with us".

Otherwise, just accept the fact that you are going to have to clean up after them, as gross as that is.

[Tamara-and-Chris0]

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@Sarah977wrote:

What would be the point of asking them to be cleaner? They are already aware that they are sharing the bathroom with you and that obviously doesn't matter to them in terms of leaving it clean for you to use. 

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Touché. Thanks for the advice!

[Marzena4]

In fact, @Tamara-and-Chris0, I had exactly the same dilema yesterday when I got to my place (two listings of private rooms within the same flat) and saw, to my horror, the wetted floor of the bathroom with hair all over it. I politely but firmly messaged my guests (two Asian girls) who came and were apologetic. I explained the reasons for that (old building, humidity, ground floor, shared bathroom) and they were willing to clean themselves. So it often happens that people are just not used to certain hygiene standards.

[Fred13]

The reality is that guests range from clean-freaks to the rare absolute-pig types; you happen to have one of the rare ones, thank God only temporary. Good advise thus far, foremost is to give them a ~reason~,  best a technical reason (clog drain), or one that all people can identify with such as it could cause creatures to appear (ants, cockroaches, dynosaurs,etc) - comes across less personal.  Good luck.

[Vinay7]

Hi @Tamara-and-Chris0, have to agree with @Marzena4 and @Fred13 that hygiene standards vary greatly with guests. It totally depends on how and where they have grown up. Its best to have a polite conversation with them and talk about your concerns. You can request them to clean up after use. If they are the understanding type, I am sure they will take it in a right way. If not, you know when they are leaving and how long you have to tolerate this. 🙂

[Tamara-and-Chris0]

Thanks, @Vinay7. I think all of you are right. We can’t force someone to be considerate, all we can do is remind them that the bathroom is shared and to try to leave it as clean as they found it. If that’s not enough, that’s what reviews and cleanliness ratings are for.

The majority of our guests are very considerate and we let a lot of things slide, but this was really surprising. They left the room pretty dirty too — only two nights but it took us twice the normal time to restore it to its original cleanliness for the next guest! What’s frustrating is they had positive reviews. 😞

[Sarah977]

@Tamara-and-Chris0   Haha. I was gonna ask if you'd managed to get a look at the state of their room yet.

[Sarah977]

@Vinay7  I'm not so sure I concur with it being a matter of where and how they grew up, I think there's a lot more factors involved. I have 3 daughters-one is a totally fastidious clean freak, one is quite messy and doesn't really understand how to keep things clean, nor does she even see it, the 3rd falls somewhere in the middle. They all grew up in the same household with me as their mother.

[Marzena4]

@Sarah977 How one behaves in their own place might differ from what they do as guests. Some people can be alerted by the fact that they are on on their familiar ground. But there are also such who, wherever they are, they don't care. That kind of IDC personality...

[Fred13]

  Ok Marzena, I know the 'new world' loves labels, IDC is a new one on me; following these ever-increasing syndromes, that one could catch from thin air and be a victim of, is one of my favorite sports.

   Hard to keep up with them, since in 1990 there were only 11 recognized. Ten years later (2000) 1000+  were recognized, which surely makes the 1990s the 'Golden Age of Syndromes'. To date, my all-time favorite is 'Yuppie Fatigue Syndrome', but I am looking for something to replace its #1 status, this mysterious IDC has possibilities.

   And morning Marzena, figure to bring you a laugh.  🙂