How would you rate another host who stayed at your place & started off a bit rude?

[Ladan1]

I'll preface this by saying that I've been burned by other hosts who stayed as guests in the past — that's a story for another day 🙂

This host stayed with us as a guest over Xmas and New Year's. They arrived late into the night and messaged us around 2am and said:

It’s very disappointing that we have been in the home for 3 hours and we are still freezing. My 5 year daughter and I still have our coats on. Not good!!

Not trying to make excuses, but Bay Area nights are cold and houses take a little while to heat up. There's a heater in the home as well as a couple radiators. The way she phrased the message though was a bit off-putting. Or maybe I'm too sensitive?

Anyway, we messaged them around 6am and it sounds like they never turned the house heater on and just used the radiators. We apologized for the inconvenience and they said all was well. To make even greater amends, we made homemade chocolate & granola and brought it over to them on Xmas day. We then checked up with them a couple times during their stay and they said everything was doing well and that they were enjoying themselves.

Upon check out, they did something weird in that they left an open bag of garbage laying on our kitchen floor with the contents falling out onto the ground.

They just left us a review, and I have a weird suspicion that they wrote something about the heater even though they hadn't initially turned it on and gave us a low rating. Again, this might be because of a bad past experience with another host.

What would y'all do in this case? Would you write an honest review stating that things got off to a rocky start and that they left their garbage on the floor upon check out, but otherwise were good guests? Or would you give your standard boilerplate "they were good guests. happy to host again!" review?

[Lilly28]

@Ladan1 

I hope you messaged them - - Merry Christmas - and lately - Have a Happy New Year...

In case you did not - do it now - in a message - give appologies that you have forgotten - but better late than never... Then message them that you were pleased with their stay and wish them easy ride or flight. Then if I were you - I would write a neutral review - yes, I would be glad to host them again, these are guests with a child, I think you have to be polite and forgive them the little things which you did not like. 

[Ladan1]

@Lilly28 Yeah we messaged them merry xmas, happy new year, and when they checked out we said that we enjoyed hosting them and wished them a safe flight back home. 

I completely understand that they are guests with a child, but the off-putting message at 2am really threw us off. As hosts ourselves, we would never write something like that to another host. We know how tough this business is, so we’re a bit more forgiving. If it was 2am and I was cold, I would have asked a question about whether the heater was working and if there was anything else I could do to heat up the home. I wouldn’t say I was disappointed...but that’s just me, I guess. 

[Piotr48]

@Ladan1 That message would put me off too. There are other ways to state your discontent.

[Piotr48]

@Ladan1  Be honest and do other hosts a favor.

[Ladan1]

@Piotr48  So your suggestion is to say that things started off rocky and that they left garbage on the floor, but otherwise were good guests?

[Karen1027]

When reviewing a guest I am brutally honest but at the same time calm, polite and professional. If a guest gave me problems I will say so, but in a nice way. Rate a star lower for cleanliness and rate a star lower for any of other review criteria if applicable in your case. When writing the review, if you feel they were nice people, say so, but disappointed to note that they left their garbage on the ground. Just be honest, its the best way. At the end of the day, transparency is key. 

[Lilly28]

@Ladan1 

It depends - I am forgiving little things, and I always try to see the things from the other side as well. It is a festive season, guests usually expect rather very well heated home, because it is Christmas and they are with a child, and also because they expect special treatment as host to host. This is only my own opinion, I would give them 4 for communication, I would not mention the garbage - as I think it was not done on purpose. Neutral review - I was glad to host these gusts for Christmas and New Year - nothing else, then the stars. 

[Ladan1]

@Lilly28 I completely understand where you’re coming from, but why do they get a hall pass when I doubt they’ve given me one? We bend over backwards for our guests. We go above and beyond. So if they are going to be honest, why shouldn’t I? Leaving a bag of your open garbage on the ground is gross, and had we not gone over that afternoon it would have certainly attracted insects. As a host, they should have known that. Either leave your garbage in the trash can or take it out to the bins. Leaving it all open on the ground, not even closing the top, is rude and gross. 

[Piotr48]

@Ladan1 That's what I would do. I used to give good reviews to guests who were messy and complicated, because I felt bad to post something negative. It was a mistake, because the very same guests did not hesitate to post something negative about my place, rate it 3 or 4 stars, or blame me for their mistakes (not reading listing description). Since then I'm being polite, but honest in my reviews.

[Ladan1]

@Piotr48 That’s my opinion, too. I spent the first 2 years giving a standard boilerplate review even to guests that really should have been 3 or 4 star guests, thinking they’d treat me the same way. But I’m more honest now and that means being blunt. Glad to know I’m not the only one! Airbnb has made me into a jerk, unfortunately.

[Sarah977]

@Ladan1  While these guests could certainly have stated their displeasure with the cold house in a more tactful manner, I think something like a freezing cold house is something I might message a host about, even at 2AM. Contacting a host at that hour to ask where the hairdryer is would be extremely rude, but this is a little more important than that. When she messaged, I don't quite understand why you didn't tell her at that point about the central heater? Because you say you only knew they hadn't turned it on in the morning. And I'm not sure why you didn't make sure the house was warmed up before the guests arrived.

The garbage doesn't seem a big deal to me, as long as they left the rest of the house in decent shape. 

And I wouldn't second guess a bad review, if I were you. They did say they were fine once the heating issue was solved, and don't seem to have had any further complaints. Just as a host can get blindsided by a negative review from guests who had no complaints during their stay, hosts have also been surprised to get a nice review from guests they were sure would write a complaining review.

I think you're being a bit nit-picky here. I wouldn't leave a negative review for these folks myself. Maybe a 4* for communication and cleanliness.

[Ladan1]

@Sarah977 We didn't see the message at 2am since we were asleep. When we messaged them at 6am we tried to problem solve with them, but it sounded like by that point she'd figured out that there was an actual heater and not just the two small portable radiators. What tipped us off that they hadn't initially used the heater was their message that they said "small heater" in their follow up message, which is our small radiators and not the big hunk of a heater we have.

We did try and make up for things with the chocolate and granola and dropped them off in person — at which point we noticed that the actual heater was on. We didn't want to look petty by pointing out the initial user error and say something like "Why didn't you turn on the actual heater, it would have heated up the home quickly." So we let it go.

Honestly, I guess I'm just scarred by the previous host that stayed with us over the summer and tried to extort us. That host left us our first 2* review and we've just been terrified since. That's why I think this host also left us a poor review because of her own error.

[Sarah977]

@Ladan1  Yes, I can see why you'd be wary that this guest/host might leave a bad review,  and also why you didn't answer until 6AM (which is still pretty early!) I often get booking request notifications at 3AM and no way I get up and answer them until after I've had my coffee in the morning 🙂 And I assume that instructions for turning on the heaters was clearly provided, they just didn't pay attention at first? 

It is annoyng when guests bother hosts if the instructions have been provided and are clear. 

But I'd still make sure the house was reasonably warm for a guest's arrival in the winter. It can't feel very welcoming to arrive late at night, with chld in tow, to a freezing cold house.

I hope you are pleasantly surprised and she leaves a good review. I've just had 3 host/guests in a row (what are the odds of that, especially considering it's the first I've had in 3 years of hosting) and all of them left nice reviews. But then, they also didn't have any complaints during the stay.

[Ladan1]

@Sarah977 Yeah the instructions for the heater are included in the home manual we leave for guests. I'm less annoyed about them reaching out, more annoyed by the tone of the message and fearful of the review even though they said everything else was great after that. I completely understand where they are coming from, but there are so many ways to say what they were trying to say and I just expected as hosts they'd give more info since the thing we hosts hate most is when guests say "XYZ is broken" instead of saying "I tried to turn on the XYZ located in the kitchen. The light comes on, but then it turns off after 3 minutes. I tried doing #1, #2, and #3. I read the instructions and tried to debug it myself, but figured I'd reach out to you in case I'm doing something wrong." Or something to that effect. I guess I can't expect hosts to treat other hosts with the way they'd like to be treated. Lesson learned 🙂

Fingers crossed she leaves a good review!