"You Are Welcome Here" - The Unforeseen Surprises of Being an Air BnB Host

[Marianne235]

As I sat sharing a dinner with a new friend last night, one of my Air BnB guests, it occurred to me how far I had come on this journey when I opened up my home to visitors after losing my husband last year.

Over the past few months I have welcomed quite a few visitors. For some Santa Monica is the first stop, for some it is the last stop, and for some it is the only stop.  I’ve had visitors from France, Italy, Sweden, Ecuador, as well as other parts of the United States.  I’ve discovered August is the hot month for visitors from Australia!

When I first began this endeavor three months ago, I had no idea if I would enjoy it. The first couple of visits were indeed bumpy as I had to adjust to footsteps in the house (my house!), clunkings in the bathroom, and the door opening and closing at all hours. There was the discomfort of having to figure out how to live in my own house with strangers in it. Simple things such as cooking or watching television, or having friends over, felt awkward as I navigated boundaries between public and private space.

Then, as with so many things, I learned to adapt and even welcome these strangers into my home.

‘Welcome.’  That is indeed a beautiful word.  I looked it up and found that it meant, “Whose arrival is a cause of joy.  Received in gladness.”

Last night me and my new friend shared openly about loss and family and aging and how do we come back together as a country. Over the past months I’ve chatted with lady jockeys in the morning sunshine, had a glass of wine with a psychologist from Sweden, shared a meal with two sisters on their own journey of healing.

In the beginning, the gift of hosting the BnB was the requirement that I participate in the world to a greater degree. Opening my home up meant that I would be encouraged to meet and mingle with people after months of being a recluse.

It also required that I keep the house clean, do the dishes, vacuum the dust before it got too thick. It required I put a smile on my face, a cheer in my voice as I opened the door to welcome them in.

What had not been required was that we might share a meal, a story, a laugh, a loss. What had not been required was that we would hug goodbye, promise to stay in touch, offer open invitations to come visit and stay awhile.

I’ve known for a long time that this house, this home of mine, has a wonderful healing energy. She glows when she is filled with guests. The cool porch welcomes the weary traveler, the sunlit bedroom is a peaceful oasis after the tiring expeditions.  I hear it in their sighs of contentment when they first arrive, “Oh, how lovely.  Thank you for letting us stay.”

“The pleasure is mine.” I honestly respond.

There is something deeply satisfying in laying out the clean sheets, placing the towels just so, cutting the sprigs of lavender to greet them.  It brings out the mother in me to shop for fresh fruit, discover new books to add to the growing collection, make their coffee in the morning.  It pleases me tremendously to hear they’ve slept well, enjoyed their stay, miss this place already.

In a world that seems filled with violence and hate and cruelty, it is a blessing to be reminded that there is also much kindness and generosity and love. In the end we are all people. As I sit speaking with folks from different countries, different cultures, it is a fierce reminder that even as there are differences between us there are also so many similarities.  A mother is a mother in any country.  A loss is a heartbreak in any land.  A friend is a gift everywhere.

It is an honor to provide this sanctuary, this oasis, this place to ease down the walls for a little bit.

“Welcome,” I say to them as I open the door, letting them step inside.  “Welcome to my home.”

[Marianne235]

Thank you so much for sharing that story. I have come to believe that we are allowed to feel loss in whatever shape it takes and that there is no comparing one person's to another.   We make our way through it to the best of abilities.

 I can absolutely feel the pleasure you found in creating your home away from home, and can only imagine how embraced your visitors must feel.

I love Portland, and have several friends there now.  So visiting you is definitely a possibility.  Will touch base the next time I'm thinking of heading up there.

Marianne

[Sesilia1]

I’m from Tonga in the South Pacific. I’ve retired and got the idea to have Homestay but I had my reservations like you cos I enjoy my privacy. I had this fear of living with strangers. But it turned out to be very fulfilling just as you said. Thanks for sharing. I’ve never regretted this cos I enjoy meeting different people from different walks of life. It makes me realize that despite the social challenges of today’s world, there are still many good people around. Giving is fulfilling. 

[Marianne235]

So good to hear that.  We get isolated and afraid of what we don't know.  Thank you for reading.

[Petrina3]

My husband and some colleagues are travelling to Tonga from Australia in August to teach the medical staff some extra skills. i know some couples have booked an airbnb . i hope it is yours. Cheers.

[Marianne235]

Oh thank you!  No it wasn't me (I'm not in Tonga).

[Chantae0]

Thank you Marianne for your post. I am brand-new at hosting. I want to learn from you all, that have good experiences. Indeed, I too would like to make a positive difference in the world of travelers. They are such fascinating people. Thanks again for sharing. You are making a difference. 

[Marianne235]

It feels like, in a small way, we are ambassadors for our countries, our cities.  Reaching "hands across the waters," to connect rather than distance.

[Βασίλης-and-Ann0]

Aaaahhh !  Thank you @Marianne235 for sharing this wonderful experience of yours. It helps to remind us of the amazing people who come into our lives & homes through this community of ours especially after a slightly upsetting experience we've just had. The 95+ % of guests make up for that one blip. Onwards and upwards !

Thanks again for the uplifting tone, which makes all the difference. Giving is fulfilling as @Sesilia1 says... and more !

[Marianne235]

As I mentioned to Lizzie initially, writing this piece, reminding myself of what I do have to be grateful for, is what is helping me make my way into this new life without my partner.

[Marguerite23]

Marianne in Santa Monica, thank you for sharing. I can relate to your post as a host. 

[Marianne235]

I am so glad to hear that.  It's been fun reaching out to hosts now, when I take a trip, and feeling like I'm part of a world wide community.

[An-Maré0]

You will be so welcome here in Cape Town. Thank you for sharing. 

[Marianne235]

I'd not thought of visiting Cape Town - but as I'm discovering with this post, the world stands open and welcoming.  Who knows, maybe one of these days I will!

[Russell68]

Way to go for your great post,  Marianne.  And how about giving credit to Airbnb for having the fortitude, courage and brilliance to start this?  Despite warnings of dangers, problems etc.  Wondering if you have any advice to other hosts about how to select guests to increase the probability of great visits?

[Marianne235]

For certain, I am grateful to BnB - both as a host and a guest, for this new way to travel about the 'cabin,' and have such a unique experience.

As far as attracting guests, I'll confess I don't always listen to my own advice about saying yeah or nay to guests, but so far I have been very fortunate.  One thing a couple of other hosts shared was how important the description of your listing is, in that it has the potential to attract just who you want to host.  Hope that helps.