Borrow, Spare or Take....Donation please!?

Answered!
Momi0
Level 10
Honolulu, HI

Borrow, Spare or Take....Donation please!?

I am sharing this experience to see if others will post their stories or advice on how best to handle this since its an ongoing issue in my home. 

First off, I have a private room and Private bathroom that I provide to AIRBNB travelers only.  I am not on any other site. 

My rules are very clear and concise about what is expected from each guests...however, this is what keeps happening.

 

I woke up around 6:00a.m. to discover that our guests had opened our FAMILY CLOSET, in the hallway of our home, taking 2 tampons out for her 17 year old niece.  I just stood there for a second and then asked her "why are you in our closet?"  she explained that she really needed some tampons for her niece and being that it was so early, she thought it would be ok to "borrow" from me.  I said..."Borrow"...implies you are returning it after you use it...and I would prefer not to have it returned once its been used!"  I chuckled a bit and then kindly asked her to close the closet since that's not part of her airbnb listing.  I then reminded her that the local drugstore was open 24 hours a day less then one mile away from our home since she would be needing more.   She thanked me and took the tampons into the bathroom to her niece.  My husband woke up shortly after me, and came into the kitchen to help me since we make breakfasts for our guests every day.  I told him what happened and he said, "Please ask her to pay for that since everyone keeps "borrowing" things from us, asking us for things, and its every guest that seems to need something from our home instead of going to the store and buying it."  So at breakfast time, I asked her to please pay me $1 for the 2 tampons as we are not "donating" these personal products to the guests.   If you are still reading, know that I am a very generous person that offers, Filtered Cold Water, bottled water for hikes, Hiking traveling mugs filled with unlimited 100% Hawaiian freshly brewed coffee at 5:30a.m., a delicious FULL breakfast, Shampoo, Conditioner, First Aid kit, dental floss, hand soap, body wash, Q-tips, Itchy cream, Hawaiian hand lotion, free beach toys, free snorkel gear, free beach bikes, beach chairs, beach towels, FREE rides to the beach and hiking trails, list goes on and on....including delicious Momi Marvelous Mango Margaritas...and yet, here is what she said to my request for $1.00!!!!!

"Momi, why should I pay you $1.00 for those tampons after we just spent $87 a night staying in your home?!" 

I was so shocked and dumbfounded that I was speechless for a minute or two....(yes I was speechless) hahahaha

and but here's what I said....

"When I agreed to accept your booking, you agreed to follow my 10 easy House Rules. In doing so, you agreed to be respectful of OUR home and my family.  Never did I imagine that it meant you could go into my PERSONAL CLOSET and help yourself to the items I buy for my daughter and myself WITHOUT YOU EVEN ASKING.  If you were staying in a Hawaii hotel, which has an average cost of $279 per night, plus $37 parking, would you go into the managers office, look for her purse,and help yourself to HER TAMPONS TOO?" 

She caught up, grabbed a $1 dollar bill and apologized to me.  I accepted both. 😉

 

But to this day, I am still being asked if I can "spare" a zip loc bag, (MANY ZIP LOC BAGS), toothpaste, toothbrush, deordorant, extra sheets, extra towels, sunscreen, extra bottled water, (I always keep a full pitcher of cold filtered water in the room with cute covered cups), 7 cups of coffee, toothpicks, snacks, perfume, hair cream, mousse, hair spray, car phone chargers, list goes on...etc...and never am I offered a donation.  And sadly, yesterday, I discovered a guest was spraying himself down with my daughters EXPENSIVE 100 SPF sunscreen in my courtyard as they were checking out for good after a ONE NIGHT STAY.....and He said, hey Momi, just borrowing some sunscreen, that ok?  My reply....."Is that your luggage next to you that you are checking out with?"  "He said ..."Yeah it is."  My reply...."Can I open it for a minute to see what I can borrow fron you right now without asking?"  He laughed....I didn't.   Guess what his review  will say.  

 

My best friend suggested I set up a donation box....but I am not a fan of that.  I just want people to be grateful that I make it easy for them not have to go to the store for everything....and some are....but the ones who are not, ask for the most!  Advice??

 

Momi

Superhost since June 2015

If you feel that me or another host have helped you, feel free to click on the "thumbs up" button at the end of any post. Thank you so much.

Aloha, Momi

Great way to contact Airbnb or via Twitter at AirbnbHelp / Facebook


1 Best Answer
Helen3
Level 10
Bristol, United Kingdom

Hello Momi

 

You sound such a generous host...and maybe this might be part of the problem. You feel your guests are playing on your generousity and to be honest it sounds like they are. You are absolutely right they shouldn't have gone into your closet - however I can imagine if a young girl had her periods they would want to get a tampon quickly and so thoughtlessly looked in your closet.

 

For the rate you charge, I certainly wouldn't be offering all those extra's. No wonder you feel put upon by your guests. I would say

 

No reason for you to get up at 5.30 a.m. and offer coffee.

 

No reason to offer free lifts to hiking trails and the beach. (Although if you want offer it at an extra cost do so)

 

Have the beach gear free of charge if you like (but I would say to guests if they want to use please make a donation to a local Hawiian charity to help them understand it has a value - minimum donation 7 USD)

 

I would just offer shampoo, conditioner and soap/body wash in terms of toileteries. You don't need to offer anything more.

 

However - what I would do is have an emergency kit including tampoons/spare toothbrushes/combs//suncream/zip lock bags on hand - available on request, for a small charge. Anything direct them to the local shops.

 

Good luck your home sounds lovely.

 

Helen

 

 

 

View Best Answer in original post

8 Replies 8
Sandra126
Level 10
Daylesford, Australia

Oh dear. Somehow I feel pleased that my listing is a self contained one as I would hate to have my personal stuff checked by guests. I am imagining myself to be a guest in need of a ziplock bag, and since I am in a fully equipped house the hosts are bound to have one, right? Little do I realise that everybosy else does this, wearing my host thin. So, why not have a note which says ''should you need anything not included in the listing price and the shops are closed, you can always ask us but be aware that there will be a small charge.'' Then I, as an imaginary guest, might think ''Great, I'll just ask to buy a ziplock bag.''

Having to resort to locks on everything is very unpleasant. Child proof locks in unexpected places? You will be opening cupboards with ease because you know where they are, but make it tricky for guests.

@Sandra126  Thank you for the brillant reply and good laugh.  Too funny.  At least they don't ask to borrow my panties....lace isn't for everyone.  haha

 

and yes, I like the advice, I will do that.  Should I put in the note that I am cheaper then Hotel rates since my last hotel in Vegas wanted $12 for the bottled water in the room!?!?  OMG....I thought it had a Vitamin in there that took away wrinkles for that price.  I almost drank it  - LOL

and yes, its very "thinning" on the host to keep giving something away like i did last night when the guests ask me for a LARGE zip loc bag...and it turns out was my LAST one. uuuuugggggg  (now I have to go buy more).  

I think my note will say this....."In exchange for a very cold beer, I am happy to provide the "extra" things you may need outside of the many things that are already provided in my listing."  Howz that Sandra?  🙂 

If you feel that me or another host have helped you, feel free to click on the "thumbs up" button at the end of any post. Thank you so much.

Aloha, Momi

Great way to contact Airbnb or via Twitter at AirbnbHelp / Facebook


Sandra126
Level 10
Daylesford, Australia

''I'll buy you a beer when I go to the shops, oh dear, forgot, never mind thank you for a lovely stay and the ziplock!''

Too vague, better to offer things for sale. I provide sunscreen, insect repellent and all that stuff free but it is different when you have control of what goes into a house, I would not want guests using my perfume for instance! Put a price on it, no surprises then. Things which are not consumables, such as beach gear, I would give free. But things which need restocking all the time - give it a price!

Helen3
Level 10
Bristol, United Kingdom

Hello Momi

 

You sound such a generous host...and maybe this might be part of the problem. You feel your guests are playing on your generousity and to be honest it sounds like they are. You are absolutely right they shouldn't have gone into your closet - however I can imagine if a young girl had her periods they would want to get a tampon quickly and so thoughtlessly looked in your closet.

 

For the rate you charge, I certainly wouldn't be offering all those extra's. No wonder you feel put upon by your guests. I would say

 

No reason for you to get up at 5.30 a.m. and offer coffee.

 

No reason to offer free lifts to hiking trails and the beach. (Although if you want offer it at an extra cost do so)

 

Have the beach gear free of charge if you like (but I would say to guests if they want to use please make a donation to a local Hawiian charity to help them understand it has a value - minimum donation 7 USD)

 

I would just offer shampoo, conditioner and soap/body wash in terms of toileteries. You don't need to offer anything more.

 

However - what I would do is have an emergency kit including tampoons/spare toothbrushes/combs//suncream/zip lock bags on hand - available on request, for a small charge. Anything direct them to the local shops.

 

Good luck your home sounds lovely.

 

Helen

 

 

 

Aloha Momi,

 

The problem with generosity is that it always ends up being abused. Limit what you extend only to what fits within your own schedule and means, not what others expect. If I've learned anything hosting, it's that the more you offer, the more guests expect. Not all of them, but you will end up with some of those every once in a while who feel entitled to everything for $50/night. Ridiculous, but such is the nature of running a B&B.

 

You have location on your side so I would recommend scaling back some and only extending extras at your own discretion only. The element of surprise to your guests will be a nice touch and you won't feel that you are being taken advantage of when you don't care to go the extra mile with some. 

 

Good luck to you and your Ohana! A hui hou,

 

Fab  🙂 

Aloha Everyone @Fab2 @City-Limits-Ranch0 @Mary151 @Sandra126 @Helen3

 

I can't thank you all enough for taking time out of your busy hosting lives to write back.  yes its true.... I am kind and very generous, (Hawaiian style) which is why even my own husband thinks most people take advantage of me.  Its my nature to want to help and give what I can, but since having our property taxes raised significantly AND our mortgage going up, all these little things are adding up that I have to pay out of pocket to replace faster then usual.  And yes, I will be deducting on my taxes but the IRS isn't very generous in sending me a refund.  🙂

 

The part about the cold beer was a joke. I thought you all would know that.  I was just being funny.  Thats how I handle a bit of stress...with humor. 

 

Loved the idea about the extra note in back of the room door.  Its actually already done for the guests checking in today. And I worded it pretty much as most of you suggested....left the part out about the cold beer...hahahaha. 

 

I'm not a fan of locks, but if it comes to that, then I will put one on this very large large linen closet that holds everything my family needs with regards to our personal products.  I already had to add a lock on my office door because I found guests had been wandering in there and with too many confidential work documents, I got concerned and now keep it locked while I am out of the house.  I also placed a motion camera in there hooked to my Iphone. 

 

Forgot to tell you all, that I have a large fridge in my garage that is used to its full capacity, but I provide a shelf for our guests for their drinks and food.  However its been brought to our attention on more then a few occasions that guests are now taking extra water bottles, soda and beer from there to enjoy without asking. I have decided to leave a note taped ON THE FRONT OF THE FRIDGE as well letting them know that all drinks in fridge are for sale and a security camera is in the garage to keep everyone honest.  Sad that it comes to this, but we came home recently to find 3 empty beer bottles in a trash can in our garage.  My husband and I put our beer bottles in a recycling bin.  Imagine THAT conversation I had to have with our foreign guest.    Eventually he did pay.  🙂

 

Hoping to one day host each and every one of you, Mahalo Nui Loa (thank you very much), Momi, Superhost in Hawai'i

 

p.s.  Just remember not to open THAT linen closet when you do come! hahahahaha And YES, I now charge $2.50 for car rides at the request of my husband.  (same price as the slow City bus ride around town).

If you feel that me or another host have helped you, feel free to click on the "thumbs up" button at the end of any post. Thank you so much.

Aloha, Momi

Great way to contact Airbnb or via Twitter at AirbnbHelp / Facebook


Mary151
Level 3
Charleston, SC

I agree with everything said here. I put my personal items like that in a closet and I put a door knob on it with a key lock. Extra TP, shampoo atc are under the bathroom cabinet and at check in I give a tour of "their space" & tell guests where things are kept and what if off limits if anything . Maybe at check in you could tell guests this is what you supply and anything more can be purchased down the street- the house proper is strictly off limits except between hours of 8-9 AM (or whatever) for breakfast only. I have seen strict rules like that posted in hosts house rules. I like the idea of a note but if I might add- maybe you are too sweet and saying it in humor like buy me a beer might not be taken seriously enough .... List your rules... Period. No exceptions. You sound very very kind and people can "nickle & dime you to death "!!! I would love to stay at your place because it sounds wonderful-- don't let cheap people take advantage-- you offer more than the average hime I think and I also bet my bottom dollar the guests know that. Good luck!!

A sign on the back of the bedroom door:

 

The supplies in your room and bathroom are yours to use during your stay, but please leave anything you do not use for our next guests.  Let us know if we need to replenish something we have chosen to provide for you.

 

Any other supplies or items in our home can be made available to you for a small fee to cover our costs.  Remember there is only 'one' of us, but there are many of 'you' and you all seem to need a small something 'extra.'

 

If you prefer not to ask us to provide what you need, the local grocery and drugstore are a few minutes away.