How to handle a guest who left a surprise in the bathroom

[Karina522]

Hi,

My current guest checked in yesterday and was very friendly when I let him in. I host a private studio space for guests. There is  a shared bathroom that Is shared between myself and  my guests. I live in a studio next door.

About an hour after  checking him in I went into the newly cleaned bathroom as I clean up for every new guest that arrives and found small drips/ remnants of diarrhoea on the toilet bowl and floor! 

I had to pee so badly at that moment I didn’t think and just grabbed gloves, paper towels, wipes and bleach and cleaned the area and floor thoroughly so that i could use the bathroom myself. I wish now I had not touched it at all and asked my guest to tend to the mess himself. I did alert him immediately with a message about how they left the bathroom very unclean and that I do not usually clean up these things for guests and would appreciate them being more cleanly and thoughtful moving forward.  I understand a possible accident but I don’t understand not turning around to check how you left things afterwards.

This person is staying with me for a total of 4 nights. I know he saw my message but he never responded, never apologised either. Any suggestions on how I should review this guest when he leaves? Especially if everything is left fine aside from this primary and very disgusting incident? 

[Mary996]

Hmmmm Tricky. Not to rub it is as he may have been ill but neglecting to clean up is inconsiderate. Hope he leaves the place in better condition.

Maybe just a brief mention in Review but with any positive comment that you could also offer?

[Dale711]

@Mary996 ,

I hope will not happen to you 

[Mary996]

@Dale711 

It has to you???? Eeeeek

[Dale711 · Accepted solution]

@Karina522 

During breakfast, I read your post.

It makes me laugh "I had to pee so badly at that moment I didn’t think and just grabbed......."

                                      " I wish now I had not touched it at all and asked my guest to tend to the mess himself. "

If I were you, I'll definitely meet him tonight,

                                                                                       " Hi, how was your day?"

I doubt he may regard me, I'll reply 

                                                                      " Hmmm..........I've got a horrific day! did you see my message?"

Follow up, I will be honestly tutoring him that after using the toilet do turn around to check again, assume do not leaves "anything" behind and always be clean.

For the review, I'll concern and depending on his feedback on the above conversation and his behaviour in the next few days. Yet, an honest review will be appreciated. 

@Karina522 It is a time for the pedicures treatment!

Happy Hosting.

[Karina522]

@Dale711 

Hi Dale,

I'm glad I made you chuckle!  Haha. People tell me it's my wording and honesty about awkward situations! I'm glad it came across via text!

I completely agree. Thank you for your advice! I think it's really important to have a discussion. It's awkward but needed. Thanks and have a good one!

Thanks @Mary996  as well! I am learning to be more upfront but with clear and still considerate wording. It's been going well! It just usually requires me to practice a bit before! haha. 

Cheers y'all! Much appreciation!

[Dale711]

Salut @Karina522,

You are the most welcome.

I am just straightforward to express my point of view on the incident.

By the way, I like your listing, it’s lovely’s, simple and pleasing In appearance. In addition, your profile photos is absolutely gorgeous.

Well done ! 

[Karina522]

Thanks so much !! I appreciate you @Dale711 

And wow ! You have so many wonderful listings! Incroyable!

I also see you are creatives 🙂 Arts, Animals and Architecture... Now I know why we are seeing eye to eye! I am an artist as well. Fine arts as well as fashion 🙂 What a wonderful thing to connect with fellow creatives overseas via the portal of air bnb haha. Thank you again. You are wonderful humans I can tell 🙂

[Mary996]

@Karina522 @Dale711 

Hi again Karina. I completely demure to the answer from Dale. Brilliant!! Yes of course you must raise this with the Guest personally and directly and whilst they are still in occupation. And then review according to the Guest's response.

That has to be the best way to go about things!! I'm a bit of a coward and dislike confrontation. But this is your place and you have every right to clarify your expectations and also you would be, very kindly, also educating the Guest. xx

[Anonymous]

@Karina522   I'd recommend that you recategorize your listing as a "Private Room" rather than an "Entire Guest Suite."  Your listing is not an "entire home" property by any stretch of the imagination if guests have to share a bathroom with a host who might humiliate them in the first hours of their stay over an extremely private matter.

A "Private Room" guest knows that their contact with the host is going to have a similar intimacy to a housemate situation, so being called out for a bathroom cleaning issue is within the realm of the expected. But people who choose an "Entire Guest Suite" are paying the premium for minimal interaction with the host, not to be confronted with mortifying complaints about their poo residue. You presumably charge more per night for that room than it's worth purely as real estate, and part of that premium is for the value of your hospitality. If the first objective of hospitality is to make your guests feel comfortable and welcome, you have to seriously ask yourself if you've served that goal well here.

At this point, I'm worried less about the review you give your guest than about the review you'll receive. You've got 9 perfect ones so far, only one more needed if you want that little Superhost badge, and in one message you've probably tanked your chances. There is still time to repair your relationship and make the guest feel more at home; I hope you're able to do this and maybe in the process he'll put a little more care into the bathroom.

[Karina522]

See below error...

[Karina522]

@Anonymous  I'm still new to using this! I didn't @ you above. oops!

Hi Andrew,

Unfortunately I can't use your answer as useful information. It's far too male centered and enabling. A grown man  or woman for that matter or non binary individual who's ego is bruised because I inform them not to leave poop behind will never leave poo behind for anyone in the future. In which case I've done them and all future individuals who interact with them in a similar capacity a major favor. 

That's literally common sense and common bathroom etiquette.  I've noticed especially when inquiring about bathroom cleanliness and male guests people sometimes love to advise that I clean up after them as though these grown humans are little children incapable of taking care of themselves. It's a form of oppressive behavior I'm not getting with ever. 

Also my space if very fairly priced and I inform guests in the description that it has a shared bathroom as well as in a message after they inquire about booking. My space has a kitchen attached to the private space so I'm all good and I've had great reviews because people love it here. I've even had individuals come back for a second and third stay so your advice is not useful to me. 

I think you should look at why you would advise anyone to clean up someone else's do-do when they can clean up themselves. I mean we all deserve more respect than that. Hosts and maids included . Even if this were a full service hotel. Honestly I would never ever everrrrrr. No matter where I was staying. And if I (as the poo leaver behinder) need to be embarrassed by someone finally holding me accountable so I can have some self reflection and myself together, than so be it. 

Hoping you learn to hold individuals accountable moving forward Andrew! It's a great human trait I promise! It also makes for better and more thoughtful humans in the world 🙂

[Anonymous]

@Karina522   Hey, any advice you get on here is provided free of charge - you are completely at liberty to ignore it or accept only that which makes you feel validated or adheres to your tidy gender narrative. But if your concept this early into hosting is "I'm already doing everything perfect so if someone has critical feedback they are just plain wrong," you've already hit the limits of your capacity to have a better listing - and, in turn, to attract better guests.

We'll see how well this kind of hubris serves you when you have a real hosting crisis.

[Karina522]

@Anonymous 

Hey Andrew, I understand what you are saying and to each his or her own. I've just noticed a pattern in this area and needed to call it out as I don't agree with it and I worry it can put people in positions they don't need to be in. 

I do appreciate your point of view and taking the time to share it but for me I'm doing this for a little while until I get a permanent tenant; which appears to be happening soon so i'm happy about that as I don't want to become a major air bnb business. Maybe we are looking at it from different scopes in that sense.

I do not think anyone should ever feel badly about advising someone to clean up after themselves no matter the situation.  Also yes,  I do have a lot of self esteem I'm really glad you noticed. I think it's a good thing to have personally.

I also would not be asking for advice if I thought I knew everything. I'm always open to advice. I just felt yours was a bit unfair. I see you have a booming business so what works for you works for you and that is a great thing! It just isn't how I plan on moving forward  in mine is all. Hoping you understand my perspective is just that, my perspective.

[Anonymous]

@Karina522  I appreciate that you've mentioned that short-term-rental is just a passing phase for you. Actually, there have been a lot of times when, talking to friends or to visitors in this forum, I've heard the very common complaint about how terrible the hospitality is at an Airbnb with just a few ratings, and it really put into perspective one key thing:  most Airbnb hosts are not people with a hospitality career in mind. A lot of them are just people with a spare room or studio or cottage who are trying to get some cash together in a bad economy, and if one of them only has just a handful of ratings, you might have to assume that they're not thinking of hosting as their real job, but rather as a thing they're doing between this and that. And hey, that's totally normal. I came from the South myself (middle Georgia); cleaning a toilet wasn't a big drama for me, but if you lived such a charmed life that telling a guest YOU MUST BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR YOUR DIARRHEA is your personal idea of how hospitality works, I can only be happy that your generation has it a little better than mine did. Yay.

Seriously though, in this forum you're talking to people who actually care about the nuances that make the difference between educating a guest on how to navigate shared space and imposing your personal notion of justice on them. *personal comments removed*