Im sharing a space with my guest and she is attending a wedding this weekend.

in
Oakland, CA
Level 2
351 Views

Hi,

My guest, who I share a kitchen and bathroom with, informed me she is Going to a wedding this weekend. She said 150 people were invited but she didnt think all would show. Im worried about her exposure and wish she had told me before she booked. Now I have to find another place to stay during the week she has left Of her stay. Im frustrated that I now have to disrupt my life and leave my home for a week. Any ideas what can I do?

an

9 Replies

Re: Im sharing a space with my guest and she is attending a wedding this weekend.

in
Leeuwarden, The Netherlands
Level 10

@Merced431 

 

It is your decision to receive guest(s) in an accomodation with shared facilities.

You can not limit the guest(s) in their social life.

BTW In my country max. 50 people are allowed on events, like a wedding.


Best regards,

Emiel

Re: Im sharing a space with my guest and she is attending a wedding this weekend.

in
Oregon City, OR
Level 10

@Merced431 I wouldn't share space with guests ever, much less now, but if you are going to do it I suggest you establish some firm house rules with your requirements for a safe(-ish) stay and make sure guests agree before you accept booking requests. At this point, with this guest, you do have the option of canceling her stay and evicting her if she is committed to her plan to attend the event. Of course, she would be refunded, and cancellation penalties would probably apply unless you can persuade a sympathetic CS rep that her behavior is making you feel unsafe.

Re: Im sharing a space with my guest and she is attending a wedding this weekend.

in
Sayulita, Mexico
Level 10

@Merced431  You have no way of ensuring that guests are taking adequate precautions when out of the house, whether they tell you they are attending a wedding or not. That is why many home-share hosts, like me, have chosen not to take the risk of hosting at this time. I haven't had a guest in my home since March and I won't take bookings at all until I feel confident that it doesn't pose a risk to me.

And it seems pretty apparent to me that a guest who would book a home share listing during a pandemic isn't that concerned about virus transmission so I wouldn't have any reason to trust that they would be concerned enough to be careful when out of the house.

 

If a guest who has stayed previously, who is known to me, wanted to stay again, I would consider it if I felt confident that they are someone I could trust to be absolutely responsible in taking COVID precautions. The only space I share with guests is the kitchen, and if that guest was super careful and agreed to wipe down surfaces with sterilizing wipes after using the kitchen, I'd be okay with that. I don't have to concern myself with airborne transmission as much as many other home-share hosts, as the guest bedroom/bathroom has a private entrance and as I live where the weather is always warm, doors and windows in my kitchen are always open so there is tons of ventilation.

 

What you could do if you want is to talk to the guest and tell her how much this affects you and that you will be forced to leave your own home for the remainder of the booking. You don't have to be confrontational,  just explain it to her straightforwardly and ask her if she can look for another place and you'll refund her for the days she paid for at your place. (in this case, just do a booking alteration to shorten the stay, rather than either of you cancelling) If she balks at this, then I guess you'll just have to leave your home for a week, as you said you'd do.

Re: Im sharing a space with my guest and she is attending a wedding this weekend.

in
Berlin, Germany
Level 10

@Merced431  I would echo some of the thoughts expressed above. If you choose to be an in-home host at what is literally the craziest time to do that in your lifetime, you have to accept the fact that you can't control your guest's activities outside of the house - nor is it realistic to think that you can make an accurate risk assessment without stalking them all day.

 

What to do? Well, obviously in a time like this if you actually care about whether you're potentially exposed to the virus, you have to set up your home and habits in such a way that you would feel safe hosting someone whom you know to have an active and contagious case. If you don't think this is possible, you should pause your listing until it is.

 

I doubt that anything good can come of treating a guest like she's obliged to disclose all of her whereabouts during the stay, when you were the one that took a hairbrained risk bringing a total stranger into your home during a pandemic. But if you have irreconcilable differences, you can request that the checkout date be advanced and refund her for the unused nights. Perhaps a small sacrifice now is a good investment in making better choices in the future.

Re: Im sharing a space with my guest and she is attending a wedding this weekend.

in
Germany
Level 10

.

@Merced431  

 

To be real honest, I don't understand Your way of thinking.

 

You have a guest inhouse who told You she's going to a wedding and now You feel unsecure. What If your guest hadn't told You she's going to a wedding but did go. You would then feel secure but in fact You'd be in a terrible danger.

 

Guests You have may or may not tell You they're going to a wedding or a party. What do You want to do about it? Put it in Your houserules that guests staying with You are not entitled to visit parties and weddings? Ok., a guest excepts Your houserules, still goes to a party and just doesn't tell You. How do You control what guests are doing when they leave Your place? You can't control it.

 

Merced, there is no solution to Your problem. Share Your home or don't share Your home. If You do share it You're exposing Yourself to the danger of getting infected and You will never know what Your guests have been up to when outside of Your place.

 

  • Airbnb is built on trust

 

Well, I would never trust a complete stranger, a person I've never see in my life and will never see again for the remainder of my life, that she didn't attend a wedding if she told me so.

 

Re: Im sharing a space with my guest and she is attending a wedding this weekend.

in
London, United Kingdom
Level 10

@Merced431 

If you feel unsure of this guest as she is going to a wedding during your stay you are always welcome to shorten her stay- the sooner you do this, the longer the guest has to find an alternate place for the remainder of her travels. A sincere conversation before and then the amendment in reservation should be enough, this would also save you from cancelling etc. Good luck

Re: Im sharing a space with my guest and she is attending a wedding this weekend.

in
Berlin, Germany
Level 10

Yes - and reiterating what @Ute42 has pointed out, @Merced431 , you can replace this guest with another long-term guest who chooses to appease you by not disclosing that they're going to a large social gathering. This would help the host to be more blissfully ignorant, but you'd have to be dumb as bricks to think it would make you safer.

 

Re: Im sharing a space with my guest and she is attending a wedding this weekend.

in
Oakland, CA
Level 2

Thanks @Yadira22 for a helpful and positive response!  I hadn’t thought of shortening her stay.

Re: Im sharing a space with my guest and she is attending a wedding this weekend.

in
Santa Cruz la Laguna, Guatemala
Level 10

Reading this from the perspective of a guest, at first I thought of how I would feel -- irritated at being asked to leave, being inconvenienced, having to find another place to stay, repacking, getting transportation, etc. Your profile says you've traveled a lot, so I'm sure you can imagine what a hassel this would be, and maybe feel put out as I would. Or perhaps you've traveled enough that you know wrenches often get thrown in plans, and I get that, too (boy, do I get it). 

 

But then I looked at the listing. You mention shelter in place in the title and in the description. You're clearly conscientious about precautions for the epidemic. If I were the guest, I would have sent you a message prior to booking, told you about the wedding, and asked if you had a problem with it. If I were a jerk, I wouldn't have told you about the wedding. But either way, I would have noticed that you're conscientious about it. 

 

However, as others have said, you've chosen to host during the pandemic. I think that if you don't feel uncomfortable with her being in the apartment, which it doesn't sound like, then the ethical thing to do is to take on the inconvenience and leave for a week, rather than put the inconvenience on her to go to all the effort she'll need to. But I think you should also make sure she's okay staying there alone, she might not be, she might have intentionally chosen to stay in the home of another woman to feel safe. 

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