New host - uncomfortable and disappointing guest interaction

[Cecilia20]

Hi all! I was hoping to get some advice from more experienced AirBnB hosts about a guest I just recently hosted. My husband and I just started hosting last month, and we have had 6 or 7 great stays and 5 reviews. We've really enjoyed hosting people, and typically the guests are very nice, easygoing, and low key. We try to be as accommodating as possible and think of things the guest would need to know beforehand (extra supplies, etc). 

Recently we had a guest who kind of confused me. When he arrived, I was away but let him in the place remotely. He sent me multiple messages detailing what he was doing with his day and expressing hope of meeting me. I didn't get to see him for more than a couple minutes the first day, and the next day when I saw him, he complained about not being able to talk with us more, stating that the reason he chose AirBnB was because he wanted to talk to his hosts, not like a hotel. So that evening, my husband and I took 2 hours to chat with him - he was very curious about our lives and asked a lot of questions. He also told us about his life; we had a pretty good time. I thought that we had resolved his concerns, and he left early the next morning. He left us a nice note in our comment book in the bedroom. 

The next day, my neighbor confronted me saying that our guest had parked in the condo's garage driveway for many hours his first day here, blocking all of the residents ability to leave! This was a great shock to me, and my neighbor said the cops were called but our guest removed his car just minutes before the cops arrived. The neighbor was greatly agitated, and I tried my best to apologize for this great inconvenience to him and the rest of the people who live in our condo.

I didn't know how to address this issue, because our guest had not told us of this problem at all during his stay. When I left him a review, I decided not to address it for a couple of reasons...firstly, I figured it was over and done with. But the most motivating factor was that this guest made me feel really uncomfortable on a visceral level, and I did not want to antagonize this person. It is hard to describe why I felt this way, and I did not want to take rash actions in case this was just a difference in personality. I did adjust my house rules to say not to block the garage entryways. 

However, when we read his review, though it was nice, he only gave us 3 stars on overall experience and cleanliness. This was really sad to me, because since we are new at hosting we are hoping to give people a 5 star (or at least 4 star) experience. He brought up in private feedback a couple of things that we could have done better, like give him a fresh towel per shower, and have more toilet paper available. I wish he had brought this up while we were there because we have extra towels in the closet and TP in the bathroom cupboard.

I'm really disappointed in this whole interaction, and I was wondering if older hosts could give some insight into what I should do now/in the future? Has anyone had an experience where their guest made them feel really uncomfortable? I feel that I may have done other hosts an injustice by giving this person a positive review.

Any advice appreciated. Thanks 

cecilia

[Carrie1]

 He sounds pretty unreasonable: a towel per shower is something offered by hotels, not generally by Airbnb. He chose Airbnb specifically because it was different from a hotel, but then he says you should be more like a hotel? Not reasonable. I always tell my guests that there's extra TP in the vanity under the sink, but, even so, it seems petty for him to mention it rather than tell you that the TP was running low. 

The only thing I'd have done differently is to have mentioned the parking issue in the review. That is, unless you think there's a possibility that it was an honest mistake: that it could be possible he thought he was parking in an appropriate place. If not, mentioning that he inconvenienced others by blocking the garage is important for hosts to know - that he's so inconsiderate. If you can still edit your reivew, I think you should do that. 

[Cecilia20]

@Carrie1

Thanks so much for your response! Unfortunately, I don't think I can edit my review anymore since they are both public now.

I called AirBnB and made a note of the incident occurring, so it is documented in some way. It is hard for me to judge the intentions of this guest - to me it is common sense to not block a building's driveway, but maybe not? I just wish that this could have been addressed in a more timely manner (while he was staying with us). 

Thank you for your feedback - I really appreciate you taking the time.

[Maria-Lurdes0]

Hi @Cecilia20 this is such a good question.  Don't worry about the review or being too late to do edits, it's a live and learn situation and you did what you thought was right at that moment.   

What is more interesting to me is that the guest made you feel an obligation to set aside two hours of your time to entertain him, and I'm sure you did so because you felt his needy vibe, and knew that it would be a better idea to give him the attention that he wanted (demanded).    

How do more experienced hosts handle it?  It's been two years since I was a live in host, but I was one for four years, first in our house then in our second house and finally in one of our apartments.   I've had similar experiences and my husband and I would often have discussions about this.   We decided a few things.   Some people need to feel that they are in the power position and have such finely tuned manipulation skills that they are able to get what they want from you.   I'm not talking about more innocent positions where it's maybe a loney person that just wants a quick chat, or a guest that wants to ask a few questions.  You felt some bad vibe, and it was probably the vibe from this guy that was "see, I got you to pay attention to me".  Ugh.   There's also another kind of bad guest that you also had the misfortunate to host, and it was the same guy!    The guest that does something pretty dumb, clearly a bother to you or to someone (blocking the garage) and then fixes it just ahead of it blowing up, and then never bothers to tell you!   I had guests last year (private listing) that let off fireworks in our backyard, the fire department was called, and the guests never thought that maybe I would like to know that emergency services showed up?  It was mind boggling to me that they never told me.

I don't have any clear suggestions or words of wisdom other then to promise you that a weirdo like this is sure the exception and you and your husband will find a comfortable level of guest interaction while still preserving your sanity.

Good luck to you!

[Cecilia20]

Thanks so much @Maria-Lurdes0 for responding with your experienced hosting wisdom/story. Your experience with the fireworks sounds awful! I guess some people would rather not bring up issues like that because it's not comfortable to address head on? In any case, I'm glad to hear that this type of guest is the exception and not the rule. Anyways, thanks again for your words and for taking the time to write to me! 

[Dede0]

I don't know if it's too late to add the allowed followup to the guest's review, but if not, I would certainly do it. Unfortunately, you can't amend or follow up to your own review of the guest. He sounds like a needy crank. One towel per shower? Even hotels now routinely suggest that guests re-use towels once or twice. And the parking thing truly sounds like he was a clueless, self entitled jerk. Who does that?

[Cecilia20]

Haha, @Dede0 I don't know who does that...I guess that former guest does it! Thanks for your response and for the advice. Since I can't go back and amend/add on to the reviews already written, I'm at least glad that Airbnb is aware of the situation and that there is a record of that happening.

[Melanie216]

Live and learn.

We avoid a lot of that mess by requiring a request/approval to book. I make it a point to "chit chat" a few messages to feel them out. If they seem odd, oops! I forgot we are booked. So sad.