@Bob-and-Karen1
"Also, on the security deposit... why wouldn't you just max it out since no charges or authorizations will be made unless I make a claim with Airbnb within 14 days? "
Not sure what you mean with max it out... @Linda108 explained it well. Also consider that even having a security deposit isn't a guarantee of getting your losses back if you don't go through the process back properly, and even making a claim doesn't mean Airbnb actually decides (yes, they decide and often it's No) that the host is to be reimbursed. Or sometimes the reimbursement will only cover (a small) part of the damage. And the security deposit isn't collected from the guest right away. What it does is more psychological and helps instill the fact into a guest's mind that they WILL be held accountable. So a larger deterrent for some.
" turn off "instant book" Airbnb hit's you with all these things like 1) your listing won't be highlighted in search, so you may get fewer reservations 2) You'll only have 24 hours to respond to request without penalty and 3) you'll lose instant book controls like penalty-free cancellations or requiring positive reviews. Seems like some things not worth losing?"
I can't remember the exact data but Airbnb's goal was to have a million or so IB listings by the beginning or middle of this year, and what better way to push people into it than with such 'threats'.
Even I (rental of room in my home) decided to give it a try several months back to either alleviate my fears or be cured for good. Beefed up my house rules even more, set the highest guest booking permission (only with positive reviews). And the first booking was by somebody who obviously didn't bother to read my house rules. So had to have that undone, but I decided then and there that IB was going to be too stressful for me. And even my finger trembled to hit the Yes button after I got that list of negative things that would happen to me!
And @Linda108's advice is sound. There are too many first-time hosts who drank the Airbnb Koolaid and were overwhelmed at first because of situations arising due to IB and their inexperience at hosting. Hosting muscle needs to be built up over time.
As @Helen3 says, without IB you can vet your guests better. It's true that if they don't adhere to house rules you can have the booking cancelled, but never simply cancel without first contacting Airbnb about it. But consider - how in your case as absentee host you even plan to even know if guests break the house rules during their stay.