A Narrow Escape

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

A Narrow Escape

Every now and then, you get a guest who seems impossible to please and you wished you had never accepted the booking. Most often these guests have really not read the listing properly and come with some very random expectations which have nothing to do with how you have described it. How do you avoid these guests as they often come with a polite and friendly introduction and a bunch of great reviews?

 

Having been stung by a particularly rude, unpleasant and incredibly demanding couple a few months back, I'm trying to spot the red flags whenever I can and put more time into doing the research, especially reading the reviews the guest has left for others.

 

Yesterday I got a polite enquiry from a lady with four very positive reviews. However, the fifth one said, "She respected my house rules, was easy to communicate with, but she was not so friendly and a bit intolerant." So, of course I looked for the review she had left for this host, only to find an essay of complaints. She even got cut off mid sentence because she had gone over the word count!

 

To summarise only a few of the points made:

  • There were a lot of steep steps from the road to the beach villa, the beach was busy when it was sunny, it was expensive to hire beach chairs etc. etc.
  • It was quiet at night but there was some noise during the day (three hours on one day from a local boat shop and on another day noise from a nearby church being renovated).
  • The villa is small. Thought it was overpriced.
  • Could have used more towels because they were there for 3-4 days. There were wine glasses in the kitchenette, but they had to buy their own wine.

Next, I checked out the host, who is a superhost with lots of excellent reviews, and a very clear listing that describes a small villa. Plus, I think it's probably obvious that if you book somewhere in one of the most expensive parts of Italy in high season, it's going to be "pricey" and busy. I have visited this area and you have to climb steep steps wherever you stay. That's just the geography of the place. The only mistake the host made in terms of accuracy was including a bottle of wine in the photos!

 

The next reviews were a bit more positive but also very detailed and even when she liked a place, she seemed to need to find fault:

 

- There’s no lift to the apartment, but three flights of stairs, bathroom is small, shower in the bath but no separate shower, it was busy/noisy, but okay, that’s Naples.

- There is a elevator but the location is still noisy. Couldn't use the fireplace so it was a bit chilly (really, you need heating in Southern Italy in the Summer?), there was a very small problem with the hot tub (she declined the host’s offer to fix it the same day), and on and on until she gets cut off by the word count again!

 

I even went as far as to look at the listings on the guest's London Wishlist. They were all fancy, in very central, expensive areas of London. I knew that this guest was not going to like my 'small' bedroom, up three flights of stairs, facing a busy road, in a well connected, but less central and not posh part of the city. So, I sent her a polite response explaining that I didn't think my listing was a good fit for her based on the above.

 

Today she responded with a long lecture and told me "I'm not sure its appropriate to assume someone is not suitable based on one review." She went into further complaints about the listing in Capri, saying they had booked a private beach and got a public one. Well, the listing doesn't say anything about a private beach. It says the villa has private access from the beach (which is clearly shown as busy in the photos). She had obviously seen the words "private" and "beach" in the same sentence and jumped to her own conclusions.

 

Now this seems like a lot of research for me to go through for one enquiry, but I feel so grateful that I did. I feel like I have dodged a bullet with this one!

 

It would be interesting to hear from others as to what level of research you go into before accepting a guest.

94 Replies 94
John1080
Level 10
Westcliffe, CO

@Huma0, based on the potential guest's response to your message, it sounds like you made a wise choice by following your gut based on the evidence! Good job! 

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

Thanks @John1080

 

Yes, her response confirmed two things:

 

1. A sense of entitlement. I don't think it occured to her that the host can also choose their guests, not just the other way around. I guess that's not that uncommon. Quite often guests write in their request, "We will be staying at your home for two nights. We will be doing this or that...", not "We would like to stay in your home.."

 

I did not hit decline as it was an enquiry, not a booking, I just told her that I didn't think my home was suitable for her and why. So, she could easily have responded in a different way/tone that would make me reconsider, but she chose to chastise me instead.

 

2. A detachment from reality/lack of self awareness. In her response, she said that there was only one review (the one in Capri) that involved stairs, noise and location and that "Obviously, loud noise is expected in large cities, not on 'private' secluded romantic beaches."

 

Not true. She mentions stairs in three out of the five reviews, complains about noise/busy location in three (including the city locations), mentions location in some way in all of them, but only positively in two, and that's only when she was a few minutes walk from the centre.

 

Either she is lying and assumed I had not read the other reviews she wrote, or she herself doesn't even realise how NEGATIVE she is all of the time! Even with the two places she said she loved, she found ways to insert little criticisms into her reviews.

@Huma0, she might not even be aware of how negative she is, but it's better to keep that energy out altogether if possible, imo! 

 

And, ha on the "We will be..." comment. She most likely is very self-absorbed and would have found fault in your place and with the stay.  I think this is a great example of how we can all step up and avoid many potential problems, although not all, simply by being thorough in our vetting process. 

Branka-and-Silvia0
Level 10
Zagreb, Croatia

wow @Huma0 this a THE nightmare guest in full glory 😄 😄  I hope she didn't book your place

 

@Branka-and-Silvia0

 

No, luckily she didn't! Thank goodness she didn't instant book, actually. She sent an enquiry because she wanted to make sure I had a Christmas tree. She was very, very angry when I wrote back saying, based on the reviews she had written for other places, I didn't think the place was suitable for her!

So @Huma0 .. do you have a Christmas tree? :)))

Lol. @Branka-and-Silvia0 yes I do. I couldn't wait untl 1st December, so put it up on 30th November. I think my tree is rather lovely (I spend a lot of time decorating it) but I didn't tell the lady that because I didn't want to encourage her to book!

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

Update on this. The lady in question wanted to book one of the two rooms I still had available at Christmas. Each got booked by young women from Hong Kong/China on those dates. The first one was delightful and has left me a lovely review with five stars in every category. The other was very friendly, self sufficient and undemandng. She hasn't left a review yet, but thanked me several times and left a very nice note in my guest book.

 

That's not to say I have had perfect guests over the whole Christmas period, but the two girls mentioned above were the better ones. Sometimes it's just worth trusting your gut and I would have been happy for the rooms to be empty on those days rather than host the complaining and critical Christmas tree lady.

Sammy35
Level 10
Pittsburgh, PA

@Huma0  woudln't even be able to detail my research its so detailed.  I missed a PI calling.  but i do all what you did.  and when i see "old" "bitties" snarking on little things i turn them away.  IDK WHY PEOPLE LIKE THAT WOULDN'T BOOK 5 STAR BOUTIQUE HOTELS.  the only thing i can literally come up with is cheap cheap cheap and misery loves company.  miserable people say miserable things to purge their own unconscious subconscious misery....critical negative projection and deflection.  send them packing....good for you!!!  i read every single nugget and tidbit i can and go as far as i can possibly go to find out who when where why and how

who in the FK could complain about italian riv up north vernazza manrola corniglia...or amalfi (positano vietri maiori minori) coastline?  in the middle of summer needing heat and walking up steps?  the steps are the entire experience.  dude stay at either salerno monterosso basecamp lol....or better yet out in vesuvius and pompeii h3ll lololol

yesterday i located a soccer player based on a photo from a previous host review for him as a guest.  a bit of digggin. i'm tight budget...i'm only 21 (i check id didn't phase him figured hed worry about that at checkin) good looking, arrogantly so, thought he could get a border "roomate for 500 then came up to 800--dude i can make that with a 2 stays 2 weekends, 2-6 days more if more than 2 people).

found out hes actually a semi pro star of 25 and not 21 on a poor budget.  bye son.

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like nikey: just do it
Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

@Sammy35 

 

Lol, great minds think alike. I literally just typed an answer to you on that other thread about this exact guest!

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

Oh and @Sammy35 , yes I also believe that misery loves misery.

 

The awful couple that I mentioned on this post (the ones I foolishly only read the reviews for, not the reviews they had left for their hosts) were the most miserable pair you could meet. It was so clear that they were extremely unhappy in their own lives. They had been married a very long time, since they were super young, but the kids had grown up and moved out and they found themselves with absolutely nothing to say to each other. The guy was wound up so tight (like at breaking point any moment) and the lady was clearly on medication and out of it. They never smiled or laughed or exchanged a kind word with each other, let alone with me.

 

They not only constantly complained to me about the most ridiculous things but they bad mouthed me to my other guests (I had two very lovely, long-term solo female travellers staying at the time) who didn't share their feelings, loved staying here and therefore reported back this bad mouthing every time. These other guests also could not stand this couple but were understanding enough to know it was not my fault and did not blame me.

 

Thank goodness most of my guests have been great. When you get these occasional nightmares, it only serves as a reminder to vet more cautiously. Sour bitter couple were what urged me to be more thorough about reading the reviews guests leave for other hosts. That saved me from demanding Christmas tree/private beach lady, so it's all a learning curve!

@Huma0 

whatever you do don't watch this, you will never get that time of your life back

but what you describe is this

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/By_the_Sea_(2015_film)

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like nikey: just do it
Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

@Sammy35 

 

Actually on my list of films to watch (I know it got slammed by critics, but looks rather stylish and I am a sucker for that). Is it not worth watching at all??

 

@Huma0  i love arty weird culty indie films.  i HATED this.  they made me so sick with their whining and despair and victimhood and malingering no no no not for me.  if you MUST see it you MUST see it that's that...i wouldn't put that awful rubbish on my worse enemy tho lol

night 🙂

~~~~~~~
like nikey: just do it

@Sammy35  I've seen that film! What a truly bizarre movie- and you're right, really no redeeming qualities, unless you just enjoy watching miserable, depressed people for an hour and a half. I failed to see why they made that movie, what the point was.

 

I also love weird culty indie films. My favorite director is Hal Hartley, and my favorite movie of his is Amateur. Most people don't "get" him at all.