Chuckles for today

in
Greenville, SC
Level 10
795 Views

Gotten from another list - maybe some of these have been “altered” a bit…but maybe not!

 

😂😂😂

THESE ARE ACTUAL COMPLAINTS RECEIVED BY "THOMAS COOK VACATIONS" FROM DISSATISFIED CUSTOMERS:

 

1. "They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax."

 

2. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food."

 

3. "We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish."

 

4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our own swimsuits and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price."

 

5. "The beach was too sandy. We had to clean everything when we returned to our room."

 

6. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as white but it was more yellow."

 

7. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers in Puerto Vallartato close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time -- this should be banned."

 

8. "No-one told us there would be fish in the water. The children were scared."

 

9. "Although the brochure said that there was a fully equipped kitchen, there was no egg-slicer in the drawers."

 

10. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local convenience store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts."

 

11. "The roads were uneven and bumpy, so we could not read the local guide book during the bus ride to the resort. Because of this, we were unaware of many things that would have made our holiday more fun."

 

12. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England. It took the Americans only three hours to get home. This seems unfair."

 

13. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom suite to our friends' three-bedroom and ours was significantly smaller."

 

14. "The brochure stated: 'No hairdressers at the resort.' We're trainee hairdressers and we think they knew and made us wait longer for service."

 

15. "When we were in Spain, there were too many Spanish people there. The receptionist spoke Spanish, the food was Spanish. No one told us that there would be so many foreigners."

 

16. "We had to line up outside to catch the boat and there was no air-conditioning."

 

17. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel."

 

18. "I was bitten by a mosquito. The brochure did not mention mosquitoes."

 

19. "My fiancée and I requested twin-beds when we booked, but instead we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be re-reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked."

 

Source: Peter Dickinson

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20 Replies

Re: Chuckles for today

in
Frederick, MD
Level 10

@Pat271 lol. Sadly I have had something similar to #18. We have had guests say "we saw insects!" on the property named Firefly Cottage....

Re: Chuckles for today

in
Charleston, SC
Level 10

@Pat271 So funny and probably real! 

 

As I was leaving recently I happened to see a guest in the driveway cleaning his windshield. I asked how everything was going expecting the usual that everything was perfect, but he was noticeably upset. "Well I didn't expect this!" There was bird poop on the windshield and guest was using the cleaning supplies from under the kitchen sink to clean it. I let him know he was welcome to use the hose that's right next to his car.  He asked if it was on, and I checked yep. Also in the guide book guest are welcome to use the hose to wash sand off their feet. My listing has "abundant wildlife" plastered all over it and most of the reviews say how much the love bird watching. 

 

 

Re: Chuckles for today

in
NY, NY
Level 10

@Pat271  An oldie but a goodie.  🙂

Re: Chuckles for today

in
Balearic Islands, Spain
Level 10

Wow! Some of this is a bit too familiar 🤨

 

We actually had an English guest who once told me that he loved the place, but there's too many foreigners. Yes, he was serious. I changed the subject. Not going there 🤨

 

Another was rather shocked that the local supermarket didn't carry any "normal" food like custard, steak pies, broad beans, or HP sauce. And no beer? (He meant English beer, we have an abundance of Spanish And German brands here) And how come no fish & chips shop? Like, how can we survive? Yes it's a challenge, but somehow we get by 😉

 

Yet another once asked "my husband is a picky eater. Do you have Burger King in Mallorca? ". Yes, you're safe from being subjected to fresh healthy food. 

 

So, I suspect the list above isn't all that far from the truth. 

 

😳

Re: Chuckles for today

in
England, United Kingdom
Level 10

@Elaine701 Your post reminds me of a very loud American who was standing outside McDonalds in Munich in the 80's extolling the virtues of 'finally being able to get decent food'. Now before I get complaints I am very well aware that, by their nature, it is only the loud Americans that one hears.

Re: Chuckles for today

in
KCMO, MO
Level 10

This is the funniest thing I've read all week. My friend works for a major hotel chain and her stories are very similar.

Re: Chuckles for today

in
Darwin, Australia
Level 10

Very funny; but as a wise owl once said: 

 

“ Hmmmm….. You can’t teach stupid!”

 

   ….  or in owl tongue:

Tu-whit tu-whoo……

 

 

Re: Chuckles for today

in
Mount Barker, Australia
Level 10

 

@Pat271  

Pat, I think mine closely relates to #3

 

A mate of mine some years ago was coming back through India on his return from England. He was in Mumbai, had been out dining for the evening and wanted a taxi back to his accommodation. He hailed this cab that had a sign on each of the rear windows that said....'English speaking driver'!

 

His reaction was, "What a great idea, why don't we have a few of those at home!" .....

 

In Australia almost all the taxi drivers are.....Indian!

 

Cheers.......Rob

 

@Christine615  @Elaine701  @Ann72  @Cathie19 

Re: Chuckles for today

in
Darwin, Australia
Level 10

Or more accurately, of Indian descent. For if the are already Australian citizens, they sadly, have had to surrender their Indian citizenship.  💐

Re: Chuckles for today

in
Greenville, SC
Level 10

That’s funny, @Robin4 😁

Re: Chuckles for today

Online Community Manager in
London, United Kingdom
Online Community Manager

Thank you @Pat271 

this is priceless! 😂😂😂


When is your ideal time for a holiday? 

Re: Chuckles for today

in
Chicago, IL
Level 10

I definitely laughed out loud at the original post and some of the comments!

Re: Chuckles for today

in
Auckland, New Zealand
Level 10

Thanks @Pat271 for the chuckles

 

re 4 - Swimwear and towels - they used to be provided for in all Sanatoriums - they were places for relaxation and spas/ Resorts as required by Laws in the early 1900's - I can't recall the exact Act off the top of my head - and most Swimming pools always had towels and swimwear for hire.

So it's not that off beat as it sounds.

 

@Inna22 @Cathie19 @Cathie19 @Robin4 @Christine615 

 

Re: Chuckles for today

in
Munnsville, NY
Level 10

@Pat271 , love them totally!   One of my favorites was a guest who complained that there weren't any street lights.  The name of our place is "Bearpath Lodging" for a reason, who would have thunk....

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