Guest 'crossing the line' and missinterprating my hospitality

[Efrossyni0]

Hello, I am new in airbnb and already hosted 4 guests. As a medium to express my hospitality, I offer breakfast to my guest: I have a place in the fridge and a place on the table, where I put goods. The guests are informed about it. In my current airbnb guest, I indicated the breakfast goods as soon as he arrived (2 a.m. in the night -I was so kind to wait for him!!!) and I also offered him to try from the food I was preparing one evening. The next day, I was away and when I came back home, he told me with a big smile that he liked very much the pasta he cooked! I looked in my cabinet and I realized that without asking me, he took a packet of my pasta and cooked it. He also opened a parmesan cheese package for the pasta to taste better!!! 

I felt really angry because I believe he crossed the line of hospitality. I told him that the pasta was a present and he told me that he was thinking to ask me if he can use it and that he choose the wrong package, without mentioning the obvious fact that he eat my goods, without my permission. I feel mad about it, but I am thinking to avoid any longer discussion with him because I do not want to provoke a revenge - review from him. What would you suggest me to do?

[Cynthia-and-Chris1]

Just be calm and honest with your guest.  Let him know the only food included is the breakfast food you placed out and to please not help himself to anything else.  If you approach him calmly and firmly, an understanding person would be fine.

[Rhonda34]

He did over step the line, but in the end its a small thing and not worth getting a bad review over. One of my guests left the iron on resting on the desk.  Not down facing thank heavens.  Its part of what we go through, 99 percent of people do the right thing. 

Just let it slide, he will be gone and another will come that will give you a better experience.  Besides that people just have different cultures, ideas and launguage and we can often have misunderstandings.

[Efrossyni0]

The guest reacted in a superb way. He bought me another pasta to say 'I am sorry'. The incidence and the discussion also created afterward a very friendly atmosphere between us! 

[Robin4]

@Efrossyni0

Hi, you are falling into a trap that I have possibly fallen into. It doesn't pay to provide too much, or make mention of what you supply because I am finding that guests who read my reviews now have an expectation of what they will receive when they come here. They are expecting a big bowl of fruit, a cheese plate and crackers, even eggs and bacon, a beer and a cider in the fridge because past guests have had that! I have even cooked meals for guests, and on some occasions guests have made mention of that in their reviews and future guests feel they have been dudded if they don't get the offer of a meal.

Efrossyni, I think less is more! The less a guest expects the more they will be delighted with what they get!

Best I think not to make mention of what you might possibly provide, and if you feel comfrotable with the guest you can grant certain liberties...the odd thing in the fridge or the pantry, but don't give the guestthe impression it's there for the taking!

Cheers.....Rob

[Efrossyni0]

Very true!! Next guests also mentioned about a pie that I baked for them (what a coincidence... while reading your comment!!!!!) and I had to reply to his review (so that everybody reads it) that pies and breakfast are not a part of my airbnb and that I may occasionally offer treats, but the guest should not expect me to do so every time. Thank you very much!

[Helen3]

I agree.

Just ask him to replace the items if you like next time he is out.

By cooking for him your blurred the boundaries. Doesn't give him the right to take your items.

Make sure in your guest book you make it clear that guests should only use items on the breakfast shelf on your fridge and that everyone else is only for the hosts use.

[Efrossyni0]

Thank you! Yes, I think I may have blurred the boundaries... I will be more careful.

[Bruce43]

it takes time to host people in your house,just have rules and hope your guests show respect,also take a few days with no bookings to clear your head.   it helps  looks like you will be a fine host 

[Annette33]

@Efrossyni0 , you got a lovely place, you show such wonderful hospitality, and all that at a really good rate! Glad the situation worked out so nicely, it is an opportunity to think about the future: in your description, kitchen and breakfast are offered as amenities, perhaps refine that a bit: when you  say, "use whatever you like", that might give people the wrong idea...I see you already have  a special shelf for guests in the fridge, perhaps it needs a note, such as, " anything on here is for you to use and consume - anything else: please ask." l put up a few friendly notes in my apartment (just a few though, or it's not friendly anymore...)  to remind them of things one could easily forget in a new place. It helps them as much as me!

Happy hosting to you!

[Huaai0]

I bought a guest coffee and took him to dinner yesterday. Hope he won't mention it in his review lol

[Efrossyni0]

hahahaha!!! I hope so too! they do it to thank you, but they put you in trouble!