I let a room, not an entire apartment. I am very new to hosting and dont know all of the rules. I informed the guests that they are using my personal room. On top of that me and my 7 year old daughter were present in the home. They decided to have sex in my room. I feel very disrespected and violated. In addition i feel i should be compensated for the linens that i now have to throw away. Please advise on what i should do because i definitely didnt sign up for this.
@Paris28, we understand you're upset, but unfortunately, you cannot control what people do once they arrive with regards to their private behavior. The only thing you can do is adjust your listing to better fit your needs and screen your guests better.
a) Be very strict about enforcing a 'no sex' rule by listing it on your listing page, in your rules and discussing it with potential guests, or....
b) Open your home only to single guests.
@Paris0 in NewYork, I had a very similar situation in my home (as a Host, I’m a bedroom away). My guests were very loud, to the point that they woke me and my dogs up (dogs started barking, LOL). My issue wasn’t a child, but that my guest, who was here to visit his fiancé, brought his fiancé to MY house for the night because her family was at hers.
My conversation with my guest was in relation to the fact that he brought a guest for the night, which is not allowed and is in my house manual. We had a very pleasant conversation about his guest and he embarrassingly asked, “did you hear us?”, to which I replied, yes.
No big deal, I washed the sheets, which I do anyway and she did not stay over again.
I would suggest that you modify your space info to include something like, “Host and children live on premises, please be mindful of any behaviors not appropriate for children”.
You’ll be fine as a host and you learn what you can and will tolerate as you go. It’s all subject to change as you gain experience and depending upon the age of your daughter, at some point it might be a segway to “the conversation” and when she is older, maybe even a laugh. Good luck to you.
As others have said, couples WILL have sex. Honestly the fact that you feel the need to actually throw away the sheets because people had sex on them tells me maybe sharing your living space with complete strangers isn't the best choice for you. It's just the mindset of the entire endeavor, other situations will continue to arise that will upset you and this is just going to be too stressful for you and your child. And yes, I have a child too. But even if its just single women you'll still get someone who yells and curses on the phone which your child might here or maybe watches porn on the TV or perhaps drinks too much wine and acts in an uncomfortable manner. You're allowing people from all walks of life with their own problems and situations that are now front and center in your life. 99% will be nice quiet respectful people, but if something as simple as people having sex bothers you this much, honestly sharing your living space on airbnb probably isn't for you.
I don't want to judge what you think and what you do but if I had a daughter I wouldn't become a host on Airbnb because it's may not a best way to earn money. As a host you have to keep many people in your house and it'd be very dangerous for your daughter. It may happens that someone abuses your daughter while you're not home. I don't want to scare you but in worst case if this happens, you can of course sue them, but you can't change anything.
It's not simple to be a host, especially if you have kids. Because you have to deal every new problem for every guest's stay. But you learn days for days how it really works. It's the same to me.
I think you should consider not doing Airbnb and your child is the first priority. If you still want to do Airbnb, maybe you can set up hosting only woman.
@Paris0 - Unfortunately, as a new host, you're having to jump right in and get a quick dose of human nature that is not flattering or kind. The reality is that sex in your bed, in your house, regardless of who is home or can hear, is pretty normal for Airbnb hosts. Some people will choose to refrain because their moral compass tells them to, but many will not see the issue the way you do (thus all the comments you feel are trolling).
There are going to PLENTY of other areas where people are going to do things you think are "not right" and may find them "disrespectful" to you or your daughter. For example: Playing a show on the TV that you do not feel is appropriate for your daughter to watch. Drinking and swearing or coming home after a night of drinking, swearing, and smoking where your daughter may see, hear, or smell this behavior. Sitting around the house in their pajamas instead of getting "properly dressed". Eating and cooking foods in the home that do not conform to what you normally eat which may cause your daughter distress (too ethnic, too smelly, a particular animal). So understanding that inviting strangers into your home means you are opening up yourself and your daughter to being host to people with different morals, ideals, and behaviors - you can't regulate everything.
Before you take another reservation, take stock. If living with people, even temporarily, who do not conform to your normal views, will be distressing, upsetting, or uncomfortable, hosting may not be for you.
And for the record, if you and your daughter were staying with us in our home (we also home-share), it wouldn't stop my husband and I from having sex in our room if we wanted.
I doubt having kids should be a pre-requisite to offer advise of this situation, because every host here is answering with the reality of hosting in mind, kids or no kids. And it is not up to Aibnb to solve such a particular dilemma; they are not compeled to accomodate every hosting reality. Airbnb is not for everyone, they have never pretended to be.
The way I see it @Paris0, you are renting a 'private room', but with special limitations, in this particular case of natural (or instintive) behavior not to occur to accomodate your particular reality and wishes, which are understandable; but unfortunately, some of those hopes will come into conflict with not only this guest but probably with many guests in the future.
That is what you should consider going further. Good luck.
Paris, I personally solved guest sex problem by writing strict rules where I take only 1 guest 18+ with no additional visitors allowed during guest stay. You can look up at my ad as I am the co-owner of one of the oldest guest houses in Europe. And we've been in rental business for 150 years literally. Maybe you can find some useful formulations from my very detailed ad for your rental business as well. www.airbnb.com/rooms/26808906
@Paris28 Was there evidence of **bleep** sex? I could support throwing away sheets in a case like this. Doo doo is never worth the trouble.
If not doo doo, how exactly did you verify that they had had sex?
You could also try placing a NO SEX sign on the bed. I've found these to be a rather effective deterrent in keeping lovers from, well, loving. Good Luck!
@Paris28 In an ideal world, no guests would have sex in the bed and bedlinen I supply. Especially if the woman is having her period. But they do, and they will, and no 'house rules' that you try to impose are going to stop them. You either accept the fact that you are going to have to deal with messy/stained linens (maybe keep separate linens for guests if the idea of sleeping on them even after they've been washed disturbs you - but how do you think hotel sheets have been used before your stay!), or you stop hosting. As for the sex noises - if you don't want your daughter to hear them, then accept single guests only - female, for safety. As an all-female household Airbnb does allow you to discriminate against men in this way.
@Paris28 you have been really quite rude to posters here, calling them trolls and (as I recall) disgusting. There's no need for that.
I have three children 8-16 and I rent a guest annexe.
I would not rent a room in the main house unless I really really had to but a quick fix would be to only rent to one guest at a time and to stipulate that they may not bring home guests themselves.
While there are people who would only have sex in their own home, a lot of people don't take that view.