Guest having sex in my apartment whilst I am there (making noise)

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Kippy0
Level 3
Alicante, Spain

Guest having sex in my apartment whilst I am there (making noise)

I have hosted over 40 bookings in 2 years I think. Never have I experienced what I experienced this weekend. A guest rented a room in my apartment for her and a male friend. I am assuming they are in their early 20ties. At first all seemed well and the guests were kind as always when I first meet them.

 

This guest is fairly new to Airbnb joined in April (no reviews) so I am also assuming I may have been her first booking. Anyway, fast forward to later in the evening, I hear screeching coming from the room so I asked my bf, if he could hear that noise (from upstairs our bedroom which is on an other floor yet not really sound proof). My bf says, Oh my god I think they are getting it on. I could not believe that a guest would do that not only in a strangers home of which you are merly renting a room, but also whilst the host is present in the house. I also believe they as they were making the bed move they have the knowledge that they would cause for noise.

 

I am super disappointed in this guest and that she would do this whilst we were in the house. I therefore feel like not giving her a good review at all. I think you can never know what people do in a private room and its the risk you take but the fact that we heard it and they did that whilst we were in the house I believe is super disrespectful. At some point I came down, turned on all the lights in the hallway, made myself known in the space and they still kept it going.

 

What kind of review do I give this guest? I feel like I have to say something about it but I don't want to get too personal and put her on the spot. I don't necessarily not wish her any future bookings. Advise anyone?

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Quincy
Community Manager
Community Manager
London, United Kingdom

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201 Replies 201
Gerry-And-Rashid0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

Tough one...in heat of the moment people don't always recognise that sound carrries so far! We really never know who overhears our conversations, arguements, comments, laughs and other sounds!

 

Personally I wouldn't .leave a bad review - but I would, as part of the private feedback to the guest, leave a comment that mentions they are in a private home and sound carries! I would make light of it though.

Denise112
Level 2
Reston, VA

Hi Kippy

I am an Air bnb host who just encountered something similar....so I did a search online to try to figure out how the heck to review this guest.  

In my situation,  I only had one female guest in my private entrance basement suite.  She was a lovely mature woman of 50.  I had no knowledge that she had invited someone else over.  About 10pm at night, I started hearing so much screeching that all I could imagine is that she was in terrible pain or just learned that one of her children died or something.  I didn't even consider the possibility of sex since I didn't know anyone else was with her.  I ended up calling down to her to check on her and a male voice answered.  That helped to explain the noises, but then I didn't know if there was abuse going on that I shouldn't ignore or what to do about it.    Luckily, he left shortly thereafter and she sent a note of apology.  She was a considerate guest in every other way, but I can't imagine what she was thinking to carrying on in such a loud manner while I was home and it was too early for me to have gone to bed--I guess she wasn't in thinking mode--haha.  It takes all kinds to make the world go round I guess....this was a first in my air bnb hosting experience of about 20 guests this year.

Robin4
Level 10
Mount Barker, Australia

@Denise112 Hi Denise, people should be respectful of their environment, and that should also mean noise but, you can understand how this would happen, and it is probably not a good idea to make any public mention of it, unless it is a part of a raft of issues you had with her....and it doesn't sound like that's the case.

I fully expect that it is going to happen in our listing and if it does, provided it does not lead to any damage....well good on em I say!

I fully understand you were concerned for her welfare, and top marks to you Denise for being so considerate, but I would give her a great review, don't embarrass her by saying anything either publicaly or privately and consign the event to part of 'lifes rich tapestry'!!

Cheers....Rob

 

@Denise112 Seems like she "got carried away" but things quieted down after your "safety check" and she seemed respectful and apologetic so I dont' think I would take any other action or leave a bad review.  

 

Do you have clear policies about guets in your rules (not that anyone reads them) but if you don't you may want to is it may give you some amount of protection if you a similar situaiton in the future where the guest is not so considerate and you need to try to get rid of them. 

 

 

Andrew - see community help guides for many great FAQ

People are just so gross. This happened to me too and Im just going to take my listing out. It is so disrespectful to have sex in my bed. It makes me feel like my home is a cheap brothel. People that do these things ruin it completely. 

There is absolutely nothing gross about doing the nasty away from home.

 

Sorry!

I agree Wendy & Frank! Thank you!

Sex and intimacy are two different things. It doesn't have to feel like a cheap brothel. What if it is a couple on their honeymoon? Having their first embrace of marriage! Wouldn't you want that beautiful energy, and the lifelong memories that they had regarding your place? I definitely would. I am very sex-positive and believe that sex has been misinterpreted and stifled by the media. Not all sex is cheap...intimacy is beautiful and to be experienced with one romantic partner forever.

Buy a mattress that you do not heavily invest in. Also tell guests to be respectful of the quiet nature of your home. Most guests will get the hint!

Pierre118
Level 1
Singapore

If you were to put her on the spot, then perhaps not the G-spot.

Rahul9
Level 1
New Delhi, India

SInce you host so many people throughout the year, Have you stopped having sex with your partner during those times?

i don't care for an answer but sex is a subjective thing and they were having it in their own room - Not in yours.

 

Having learnt from this experience, Please clearly indicate in your listing "No sex allowed while I am at home"

You need to learn and if the guest's behavior doesn't suit you - Add it in your listing.

Nobody thinks sex is a negative thing, but guests must be realistic within the environment they are in. Guests cannot expect to use your place as an "anything goes" type of room. Discretion goes a long way and not everyone has the same attitude about hearing other's primal urges.

Susan383
Level 3
London, United Kingdom

I rented my single room to an American girl.  She had broken a bone in her ankle. She asked if a physio could come round and look at her ankle.  I agreed of course. He turned up with a bottle of wine which I found suspicious.  The next night he turned up again.  When I went into. Y kitchen I could hear the bed springs pinging upstairs. I was about to go upstairs and he came out of the room naked .  I told him to get out.  What should I do.  I think I should put no sex in room on my listing but don't know how to get into Edit summary.  Many thanks Susan

 

 

@Susan383

Please don't be a prune... If you don't want your guests to have visitors just write it in your houserules and stick to it. Your guest rent a room, pays for it, it's theirs. Having a no sex-rule is soooo 1632... Just be happy they enjoy your space.

 

Mariann 🙂

Robin4
Level 10
Mount Barker, Australia

@Mariann4

Mariann....where have you been....or have our threads not crosed lately!!

 

@Susan383 guests are going to be people and, a bit like breathing, people need company. I can understand that being confronted by a nude stranger in your own house is a big ask but, hosting other people is going to introduce you to strange scenarios. I am sure the guest would have been just as embarrased as you were.

Let it go, it will probably never happen to you again in your hosting career! Just put it down to being part of life's rich tapestry......and tell us, was the view worth it?

Cheers.....Rob