@Kia272
Kia, there is always a middle ground in life and our secret to success is staying on that middle ground.
Firstly, as she wished to alter the day of arrival after the the stay had technically started it would have been best to say to her that the Airbnb system won't allow an alteration to a start of stay that is already in progress....hope she can see that. Make it someone elses fault not yours. At least you could have got the stay off to a reasonable start.
The smoking, unless you have some pro-active measures like a cigarette smoke detector/alarm there will always be the odd smoker who will push the boundaries and it is up to you to decide if making a stand will be worth the poor review which will inevitably follow.
Guests don't like being caught out! It's not their fault they broke the rules, it's your fault for having such rules that impacted on the stay they have paid you for!!
Minor breakages also need to be carefully considered.....in almost all instances they are accidents, the guest didn't set out to smash something, they were just careless. I understand this is the risk with renting out my property, I make allowances for it, and as long as it is not deliberate I don't publicly mention it.
My last guest broke a butter dish......
I am faced with the situation now,.......
A/......I can get onto the guest and get the obvious off my chest...."Why didn't you tell me you broke the butter dish"? ....the guest gets all defensive and says it wasn't them, or, all snippy that you had the temerity to criticize them for what was just a little accident. These little things happen and that is what the guest is paying for, is the way they see it.
They would resent me raking them over the coals and would give me a revenge review...3, possibly 2 star. Is it worth it?
That butter dish was one of six I bought online for $5.00 each, and in 18 months is the first one to be broken.
B/..... I will say nothing to the guest about it at this point, they will consider themselves lucky to have got away with the breakage unscathed and will in return give me a good review. I will give them a reasonable (but not wonderful) review......."We do our best to provide our guests will a nice comfortable stay and I hope that XXXXXXX enjoyed their stay here with us. A little bit more care would have been appreciated but as their guest career moves forward I am sure they will learn. I wish them well for the future and would host them again!"
Once the reviews are published I will through the message stream, say how disappointed I was that the breakage was not worth making mention of and how a little bit more care was not taken with our property. At that point that good review they gave of me cannot be removed and it will hopefully shame them into being a bit more responsible next time!
Kia try to work with guests without giving in to them. If they overstay the check-out time, remind them you need to prepare for the next guests and ask for their cooperation, don't threaten them with police action.....that will guarantee you will get the raised finger every time......and a rotten review!
Wait some time before you write that review, don't say how bad or how wonderful guests they were and, don't be too specific. just limit your comments to something like ...."It was unfortunate that my house rules did not appear to be particularly important to them, I was just fortunate their stay did not have a greater negative impact on me. I wish them well but, would decline the opportunity to host again and do not recommend to other hosts"
Don't mention threatening to call police, that is starting to make you look a difficult authoritarian host.
Cheers........Rob