Help writing a review

[Jeanette-and-Kalid0]

Hi all! I had a week-long guest check out this morning, and I'm having a ROUGH time trying to figure out how to review him. I like to make my reviews as honest as possible, but in a way that doesn't come off nasty and angry when my guest wasn't that great. In this case, I have no idea how I'm going to do this, so I thought I'd reach out to the community. In short, this guest was very antisocial, demanding and caused us to feel unsafe in our own home. He kept very odd hours, and took all of his luggage with him when he would leave for the day. This made us feel like he was hiding something from us. On the positive side, he was rarely ever home, and when he was, he kept to himself in his room. Upon checkout, he asked for an inspection of his room, and we found that he left it very clean and even made the bed almost exactly the way we do. I have very mixed feelings about how to review him, and don't even know if I would recommend him to other guests. Please help!

[Zacharias0]

I've been in the same boat myself and gave myself a few days to review the situation from the guests point of view. Sometimes our mind creates stories to make sense of the whole situation when in fact none of it existed in the first place. He could have taken his luggage everyday as he may have needed the items or just had very valuable items in his luggage. He may have seemed demanding to one host and to another host could have seemed very open with his communication. Not sure how a guest can make a host feel unsafe so in my opinion thats a very subjective issue that can't really be substantiated in a review without backing evidence. My guests manage to leave my doors unlocked and sometimes leave the doors wide open which leave me feeling unsafe, but your experience may vary.

Not all guests will be the same and honestly this guest just seemed to not have the social graces that most hosts would find ideal, but overall he seemed to be about what comes through my door every once in a while as well. The key is to not expect too much from our guests and treat each guest the same.

[Jeanette-and-Kalid0]

Hey Zacharias! Thanks for taking the time to respond. I guess that's exactly why I feel so unsure about what to write. I understand exactly what you mean, and it's what I've been thinking too. There were many positives; he was very clear about what he needed, (he made me a list of things that he required in the home before booking) and about his schedule (since we don't loan out keys, we have to let our guests in). He was also super clean, very quiet, and hardly ever home. But there were other things that I really didn't like, and that I'm sure other hosts won't like either. The very first thing was that he was "shocked" to learn that we have dogs. I am very clear about this fact in all of my listings. He very literally would run away from my dogs, and jump whenever they "snuck" up behind him. Every single time he would shower, he complained that the water would take too long to come out hot. He actually timed it once, and said that it took one minute to come out hot. He would ask us to go into his shower to check the water. We had to explain to him that it just takes a few moments to heat up, and we explained this every time he showered. It was super difficult to talk to him, because he mumbled a lot and never looked us in the eye. He was visibly uncomfortable any time he had to speak with us. I'm not the most social person in the world, but I think that if you're making the decision to book an Airbnb, you have to be willing to have, at the very least, the most basic interaction with your temporary roommates. I feel like I will definitely want to put in his review that he would be more comfortable in a hotel. Maybe this is the only thing I should put in his review? Obviously, reviews aren't the place to be airing dirty laundry.

[Kathy101]

The way you phrase his behavior it sounds like Aspergers or the autism spectrum...

[Alice-and-Jeff0]

You've already said it all.... "He was quiet, clean, made a list of things he needed to make his stay comfortable, was concerned about the hot water which we couldn't resolve during his visit, and did not interact with us much at all.  We would recommend him to a host who enjoys a guest who will provide them with a lot of feedback, requests upfront and will leave a perfectly clean, tip top room looking just like it did when he checked in. We think we we were not the best hosts for XX as we prefer a more social, interactive and laid back guest but think with another host who enjoys structure, he would be a good match. " .... take some of the onus on yourselves since you couldn't really figure out a way to talk to him to make him settle down in a way that made you comfortable and leave it at that.  While weird isn't really a reason to give a thumbs down, I think it's appropriate to do that here.  

And based on what you've said, I agree with @Kathy101, definitely someone on the Autism spectrum, thus the rigidity, need to try and resolve a "problem" like the hot water, providing you with his schedule of his activities (remember Dustin Hoffman in Rainman - 10 minutes to Judge Wapner)  and taking of "his things".  

[Jeanette-and-Kalid0]

Alice & Jeff, this is perfect! I didn't want to use any negative words, and I think the way you phrased it is amazing. We just didn't match, but that doesn't mean that he can't work well with another host. Thanks for your help y'all!