How to Deal with Demanding Long staying guest

Bianca156
Level 10
São Paulo, Brazil

How to Deal with Demanding Long staying guest

Hi All,

 

I am writing to you basically to request for tips. I've been hosting for six months now. During this time, I have had basically guests that were staying in my place for no longer than 11 days. 

 

A week ago I started hosting a couple that is going to stay with me for another 45 days. They are not rude, but the lady is really demanding. I never had any problem with my guests. Everyone loves my apartment, it is all completely new, as I started from scratch and but this Airbnb together past March. It is personal, with items I brought from my travels around the world as a cruise ship crew member. It all reflects my personality and I am more than happy to share with everyone. But this lady is not happy with anything. She changed all my furniture around. Keep stuffing my personal items into the closet and asking me to buy her items that I  have but she doesn't want to use as it is. I can go along with the Communist flag that she has placed in the middle of my living room. I want her to feel comfortable

 

I got really upset to know that she was using my breakfast table tray as a table to place bags in the apartment hallway. I removed it and kindly left a message why I was doing it. I have been trying to accommodate all her requests but I am getting a bit tired of it because I have never face any guest like her. ALL my past guests were only compliments about my listing. I am anxious and afraid to lose my temper and end up with a bad review and mess up my perfect rating. 

 

I have worked on cruise ships for over 14 years I am used to all kinds of demanding people and I was always super nice and friendly with all my guests. I have been enjoying the Airbnb experience so much. But this lady thanks She is at a Hotel. How would you deal with this?

 

 

41 Replies 41

@Letti0 She is crazy... this is the 6th time they come to Brazil. He's a Scientist working at a very important university and she is a Journalist. She will spend the hell of money and will ship it back. Money is not the problem at all. I am not concern about it because they already requested to leave early. They were supposed to stay for 62 days and cut it to 52. I am just frustrated with all. Never had someone changing my things around to stay in my apartment. They just don't understand the concept of Airbnb. At the review, I will write that they are better in a Hotel that has full service and that they can request all they want. 

@Bianca156  In that case make sure you thumbs down and under 3* and then report her so when she comes back she can't book you again lol...

Bianca,

I had a similar experience--there was an older couple/he recently retired & sold his business and were buying a house in my town, so were staying for 3 weeks.  She was to be working as a psych nurse.  Before they arrive, he called me to ask what days I'd be cleaning the space (they were in lower level of my house) & I had to let them down easy that I didn't clean their space while they were there.  He seemed miffed that I didn't clean their space but charged a cleaning fee.  They demanded I buy window shades for all the windows in large family room that she never seemed to leave.  (The bedroom windows have shades.)  AND, most odd to me, they, too, rearranged lots of my furniture--including an antique, guilded headboard that they brought out of the room and hung plastic, recycling bags on!  The removed at least half of the art on the walls, hid the pieces under the bed and put up cheap plastic clocks in their places.  They, additionally, were so unfriendly that neither I nor my other guests felt comfortable going past them to do laundry in the laundry room.  They were so odd!  So, I didn't write a review and I don't think they did either!

OMG Lila! You know how I am feeling then. I am so sorry for you too! I just want time to fly. It is going to be over in the end of September 🙂

 

Good luck, then, in the interim.  The great part of AirBnB is that just around the corner is a fabulous guest!  I bet your next guest will be wonderful!  Good luck and godspeed!

I would never let a guest establish tenancy (generally 30 days in the US).  28 day maximum.

In Brazil, we don't have this. Here it takes years to establish tenancy. 

Michael956
Level 10
Salvador, Brazil

@Bianca156  Your listing is lovely and beautifully decorated .  I also take pride in how I decorate my house with things i've collected around the world, and it would drive me CRAZY if a guest tried to change or hide my decorations.   Your guest is showing great disrespect for you and your home.  

@Michael956, unfortunately, I have to agree with you.  But as @John1080 said, I will have to tell her my concerns and frustrations. Especially because I am going my way to help her with absolutely everything. Bringing items that she askes me. Taking her to see the neighborhood. Helping with shopping and to adjust as she must stay here as her husband works with the University. @Michael956 Your home is also so lovely! I love San Francisco. I was there with the cruise ships a couple of times and loved it to bits and pieces! 

@Bianca156

Talk to the friend you are doing the favor for. Tell that friend they need to talk to your guest and MAKE her understand the way she is acting and treating you is unacceptable. (Even though you have no intention of kicking your guest out, your friend does not know that.)

 

Also....I think you should stand your ground. Be firm about dos and don'ts. I think this is a clear case of you giving an inch and the guest taking a mile. You are not that guest's personal assistant or maid. Don't let her treat you like one. 

 

My experience is that long term guests need a different, and much more extensive set of rules compared to short term guests. 

 

I had a guest that was a bit passive-aggressive last year. Henry and I maintained a businesslike attitude - polite, helpful with a smile but kept personal interaction to a minimum and kept our distance. 

I agree that the doctor friend is careless and at fault. Unfortunately guest is a "pro".

Her communist sympathies dictate that others (rich landowner) should pay for her.

She loves rules and will play them.

If she got word from doctor friend that host was complaining about her stay, she'll be on the phone to Airbnb claiming harrasment and she'll get a free stay.

Jessica, You are right! I completely changed my behavior with Her. I am treating her with respect and that's it. Last week she asked to come over to the apartment and complained something about the toilet sink. When I came over, everything was fine. So I took the opportunity to pinpoint some things. She even complained that I have removed that tray. I explained why I removed and told her that because she had moved the furniture around, now she didn't have anyplace to put her bags and keys on. She told me that she didn't want to use that furniture for that. SO...... that's her problem. I told her that I was not going to buy something else. She is just difficult and I am counting the days. Regarding my friend. I told her what was happening, and told her that If money is not a problem, next time she should help them to find a Hotel with Flat Services. I won't recommend them in my feedback. 

 

Sarah977
Level 10
Sayulita, Mexico

@Jessica-and-Henry0@Bianca156   Jessica, you took the words right out of my mouth! Bianca did this as a favor for a friend. The friend needs to be taken into the picture to tell this woman that she is taking advantage of someone who opened her home to her for much longer than she normally takes bookings,  that it's embarrassing to have recommended her if she behaves this way, and that she needs to show respect and appreciation or find another place to stay.

Isaac80
Level 1
Cheyenne, WY

For my listings, my designer and I have put a lot of time and energy into setting up a nice looking place with a design aesthetic we want to continue.  For a Guest to come in and demand changes...I would deny deny deny them that option. Not in a rude way, but with the understanding that they chose my listing, if they aren't happy with it, they are more than welcome to cancel their trip and choose someplace more suited for them.  I had one guest who was very private and wanted basically to black out every window for "security" but with patience and clear communication, they agreed my measures were adequate and they left the house almost exactly as they first saw it...good luck to you.  Communist flag? Really? I didn't know that was a thing. Lol

Thanks, Issac, after all,  I've added some observations to my listing for further cases. I am not accepting any reservations longer than two weeks. I don't want to be involved with people that are looking into living in the apartment. In my city, we receive a lot of Business and Educational Tourism, short stays, and I am happy with the people that bound with the pictures and feel that they want to stay there just because they like the aesthetics.  There is not a communist flag, but she used lots of objects that reflect her political view. I am a Buddhist and I don't have absolutely anything that reflects my religion and my points of view because I don't want to offend anybody. Anyway, I've made peace with the situation. After they leave, I put everything back and carry on!