How to handle those difficult reviews!

Robin4
Level 10
Mount Barker, Australia

How to handle those difficult reviews!

I have posted this comment on another thread but have felt that, due to problems experienced by new hosts when it comes to how they should handle the review of difficult guests I would open a new thread.

This is a long post but a lot of time and thought has gone into it....We all learn every day, and as you continue to host you will become very proficient at sorting out 'the wheat from the chaff' but if you take note of these points I am sure this post will stand you in good stead!

 

Reviews cannot be taken frivilously because they are the centrepiece of the ABB platform. But on the other hand we are reminded at every opportunity that anything less than that 5 stars is not good enough...and for that reason we 'pussyfoot' around issues for fear what we say may come back to bite us in the bum!

And if we start rating our guests as per our experience.......ABB will find a way to remove it!

 

From seeing thousands of these posts I think I have come up with a protocol for reviewing.

There will be some hosts and guests that will fall outside of the common boundaries of accepted behaviour! There are times when police will need to be involved and even more times when help from Airbnb is required and these incidents will require immediate action, but this will only ever be the case for a handfull of bookings over your hosting experience, particularly as you become more experienced in spotting problem guests before accepting! So what I am saying will not be relevant to those situations. What I am talking about are those hostings where rules were broken, personality clashes existed, and there may have been a different perspective between host and guest. If you are concerned about what to write, try the following! And if the reviews do differ wildly keep these points in mind for your review response:

 

1/. Never write a review until you have had two nights sleep after the departure of the guest! There are many little things that will annoy you enough to make a comment when they are a fresh experience, but which, with time, will mellow and can be appraised in a more objective way.

2/. Always write a review as though you have been asked to do it for someone else. 'YOU' will see things as being 'bleedin obvious' because it's your 'turf'! Another set of eyes will see a legitimate reason why the guest did (or felt) what they did!

3/. As I have said before, make yourself a nice drink, leave your emotion out in the garage, or out in the barn before you sit down at that keyboard. What you write at this point will stay with you long after you have forgotten about that belligerent 'turkey'! It will stay with you as long as you host and....it cannot be removed! We have all said things we wish we could take back! When it's in a review it is 'set in stone'....there is no going back!

4/. Tell the community what you feel about this guest, but don't give the guest a reason to resent you. As I said in a comment in another thread, you can make them feel guilty by carefully selecting your words but still finish by wishing them well in future. This way the balance of nature is restored....you made your point, but you have also said 'no hard feelings'!

 

And if their review is a stinker:

5/. Never get into a 'he said/she said' slogging match with a guest. You will always loose, and you will make yourself look petty and a difficult person, in yourself, to deal with. Remain aloof and always assure the guest you value their contribution because after all, the only way you can become a better host is to take notice of what others say. Don't apologise, but tell the guest some things are beyond your control.....like, how much cloud cover may have been present on the day! But tell them that their comments will be taken on board and acted on.

 

Many guests will form an opinion of you by how you carry yourself in the review process....you can be seen as a diplomatic person with great hosting skills........or you can be seen as a 'tough nut to crack' !

Sorry this is so drawn out but, it is a major issue on the forum ....I am not saying I am the review sage but I have had a lifetime dealing with people....I took a mechanical services company from 3 employees to 27 in 6 years......and I don't think my people skills are all that bad!

Cheers.....Rob

238 Replies 238
Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

@Victoria567like you, I try to lay it out plain and simple, loud and clear, in my listing description and house rules. It's amazing though how many guests refuse to read these (even when they confirm they have). 

 

One would think it's the Millenials with their purported short attention span that would be the mot guilty, but in terms of either not reading anything, or reading it and then expecting it to be how they 'want' it and not how you described it, the older generatioin are by far the worst in my experience.

 

I do occasionally get guests in your age bracket that are like you and I am eternally grateful for them. Unfortunately, they seem to be the minority.

Victoria567
Level 10
Scotland, United Kingdom

Hi @Huma0

Unfortunately the march of this type of  guest through the air bnb platform in my recent experience has nothing to do with age or education.

The only common denominator is an inflated sense of entitlement, which boils my onion!

 

Ive got a few red flags now 

Masses of communication before hand by this type of guest.....just to make sure they dot all the “i” and cross all the “Ts”

 

Picking your brain dry....short of you booking everything for them, as you have in their mindset now morphed from host to servant.

 

The day before, telling you they WILL be arriving much later than 9 pm.......and hope it’s ok....too bad if it is inconvenient for you the host as they are more entitled than you.

 

At breakfast letting you know about their various food fads.....this August I had more food fads, allergies, food intolerances than in my 30 odd year career working for the NHS!

 

Hence my listing clearly stating not suitable for Nut allergy, food intolerances or allergies.

Who wants an ambulance chasing lawyer?....no thanks!

 

Long stays....no thanks.

Kids .....no thanks

The list gets longer as a result if once bitten and twice shy.

 

The great majority if my guests have been wonderful people, I even still correspond with several of them......but it is the small handful of entitled ones that sadly you remember, unfortunately for all the wrong reasons.

 

 

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

@Victoria567

 

You have more or less summed up my current guests!

 

- Masses of communication before hand by this type of guest: YES! Endless questions about stuff that's already stated on the listing.

 

Picking your brain dry: YES! Everything from Avis locations to specialist magazines, but won't read my guidebook.

 

The day before, telling you they WILL be arriving much later than 9 pm: Didn't want to give me an arrival time, didn't tell me their flight was delayed, didn't respond to my messages, left me waiting for hours...

 

At breakfast letting you know about their various food fads: I don't provide breakfast, but these guests still find plenty of ways to fuss even over the coffee making facilities, colour of the sugar etc.

 

So, all the red flags are there, but these are flags I only saw after the booking, so how can you avoid these types of guests? I always ask guests to confirm they've read the listing/house rules, but a lot of the time they just lie about that.

Victoria567
Level 10
Scotland, United Kingdom

Hi @Huma0

Please have a look at my listings house rules.

Ive turned into Atilla the Hen, but I’ve some crackers this season, you could not make it up!

 

 

Today I looked at my progress report ( I’ve finished my season now)

 

Guests gave me 4* for inaccurate address, my street is stated including the postcode, so what’s inaccurate about it?

 

What blew me away was a 5 * review and the host comments about a list of missing items.

are you ready?

 

Missing bed linens.....pure cotton 1000 thread count sheets, new down duvet, 100% cotton duvet cover with pillow cases to match. A 100% pure cotton quilt folded at the bottom of the bed.

 

Mising pillows....2 feather pillows on the bed and another 2 pillows in the wardrobe which I showed them when I accompanied them to the bedroom.

 

Missing toilet paper ...a full roll of Andrex and a box of Kleenex tissues in the bedroom 

 

Missing soap....reality a bottle of Molton Brown handwash and a large basket of toiletires that included shower gel, shampoo, conditioner, hair mousse, hair gel, make up removal wipes, cotton pads, sanitary towels, tampons, disposal bag for sanitary pads, toothpaste, dental floss tape, hand cream which I pointed out when I showed them their private bathroom with overhead mineral shower.

 

Only one towel.....reality a large new fluffy cotton bath towel per guest, a cotton face cloth per guest and 2 cotton bath mats.

 

I was so cross that I phoned air bnb today to complain about this nonsense...I’m a consistent 5* Superhost, does anyone believe I would omit all these items from a top quality bedroom?

I myself do all the cleaning and preparation of the bedrooms and bathrooms.

 

I might be retired, but I’m certainly not retarded!

 

Air bnb said nothing they can do and not to worry as it does not impact my 5* rating.

What bothers me is how these girls can lie about the amenities provided which are top notch.

Ive noticed a significant pattern with these entitled guests this season.

Female

Vegetarian/ food fads/ allergies....I’ve had more of these allergies in the month of August than I’ve had in my entire long career working for the NHS.

 

And all from the land of the free.....have they opened up all their lunatic asylums? as the last 2 seasons ALL the guests from that part of the globe have been absolutely outstanding.

 

This year I’ve been lumped with all the virtue signallers! 

 

Phyllis2
Level 4
British Columbia, Canada

Thanks for the laugh today.  Yes the inmates are running the asylums.  As I’ve said before Brits are our favourite guests.  With Germany and Belgium, and Netherlands a close second.

as far as calling Airbnb about unfair or outright lies forget it.  They don’t do anything but tell you not to worrry about it.  Well that’s now the first review everyone sees when looking to book and do they read the other one hundred stellar reviews below it.  It’s an unfair system.

For you and I who take this seriously anything other than five stars feels like a personal affront when you knock yourself out for every guest.  Keep a stiff upper lip and maybe we should swap Airbnb’s one time and critique each other.  

Victoria567
Level 10
Scotland, United Kingdom

Hi@Phyllis

Hah Ha Ha

The concrete is still slowly setting on my upper lip😉

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

@Victoria567

 

I've just read your house rules and I don't think they're particularly long or strict. Mine are longer and while not as strict in some respects (e.g. my guests have unrestricted access to my kitchen), I have a lot of restrictions you don't.

 

Your rules about laundry are very sensible. I also need to stop guests hanging wet laundry in bedrooms, especially on upholstered furniture. The nightmare guests I mentioned earlier left a loadful of dripping wet (handwashed) laundry hung all over one of the bathrooms, all around the bath tub etc. etc. This is a shared bathroom and they knew I had other guests arriving. I had to go and hang all of it in an appropriate place (the two drying racks on the terrace) as I can't have my other guests seeing the bathroom like that!

Victoria567
Level 10
Scotland, United Kingdom

Hello @Huma3

Thus is the very reason I limit any guest stay to a maximum stay of 3 nights.

If they are intolerable....the saying that springs to mind is.

 

A guest in your home is like a fish.......after a period of 3 days they tend to go off!

 

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

@Victoria567

 

Yes, I get your point! If these guests were only booked for two nights, I would be over it already. Eight nights seems very, very long now. The guy was hammering on the floorboards again late last night. He woke another guest and scared the living daylights out of her.

 

However, I have found that most of my longer term guests have been wonderful and I usually prefer them. At the moment, in my other two guest rooms, I have a young lady staying over three weeks and another staying for three months. Neither are any problem at all. If I had 2-3 night stays in each room, I would be run ragged. I can't manage that with my day job. I was actually hoping to get more long term guests.

 

This is actually the first time I've had problematic guests staying for so long and these guests are luckily not typical. 

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

So I just had a guest (checked out today) who was a pain in the backside (lots of issues with communication, for a start), but seemed like a nice girl. I have a feeling she will leave me a good review, although of course I can't be sure.

 

I don't want to cane her in my review, especially since her last host mentioned an accidental spill on the carpet and gave her a low cleanliness rating (even though it's clear from both sides she paid for the damage).

 

So, I'm going to be nice, but not glowing, in the reivew, give her appropriate star ratings and send her this private feedback, which is rather long, but I want her to understand that she needs to be more careful:

 

"Hi X, it was lovely to meet you. Thank you for being such a nice and friendly guest. There are a couple of small things I should mention though.

 

You seemed to continuously leave your bedroom lights on while you were out (something I ask guests not to do in my house rules).  On the first evening, you left the bathroom light on after showering and your bedroom night on all night while you were out. The next day you left lights on in the bedroom the whole day and evening and, even when you checked out, left some lights on in your room. I’m not sure if this is something you do at home but, apart from my bills, I don’t think it’s great from an environmental perspective.

 

Also, I was a bit surprised that you left rubbish all over the bedroom floor and on the bed when there is a bin provided in the room and there were also some black marks on the bedspread (not sure if you maybe put your suitcase on the bed?) and some stains on the sheets and duvet cover. I’m not sure what those are but they looked like blood. I appreciate that in your previous Airbnb the cleanliness issues were due to an accident and that you paid for the damage, but if you want to improve your ratings on Airbnb, I would advise that you be a little bit more careful with your host’s things.

 

I hope you do not take offence. I think you are a very nice girl and I have not said these things in the public review because I don’t want you to get another review mentioning problems with cleanliness etc. I just think, with a little bit more care next time, you would receive better ratings.

Best wishes,

Huma"

 

Do you think that's okay? I feel a little like I am giving her a lecture and I don't want to put her down too much...

Andrea9
Level 10
Amsterdam, Netherlands

@Huma0 I for one think she had it coming. You were considerate not mentioning it in the review, which is probably more than what another host would have done. She sounds like she's a charming but household-wise a bit airheaded person still. I know growing up to adulthood I've had a few people call me out nicely but directly on issues, which of course stings. Yet I can tell you thatwas lesson learned, and I'm glad I got the message early enough on and not later.  

Not saying something is supporting and fostering sloppy or bad behaviour, and while many say it's the cost of doing business, I can't help but notice how many hosts are lamenting how many Airbnb guests are not that great, on the whole have gotten worse. Maybe it's time we private hosts put on our big girl or boy pants and say something. Help make ia better guest world out there or something...

And thank you for hopefully improving one guest's bad behaviour for the next host(s)!

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

Thanks for the feedback @Andrea0,

 

Yes, I think you are right. It's rare that I've given guests this kind of private feedback and, when I have, I've not usually heard back from them (except for one guest who blamed it all on her travelling companion!). Still, if this guest does take even a little bit of it on board and learns for next time, then it's worth a shot.

 

Incidentally, I had another set of guests staying in another room at the same time who had only one bad review (related to cleanliness) and terrible star ratings. When they requested to book, I asked them what the deal was. They said they had no idea why the host gave them such a bad review and they'd had no feedback from her. I could see from their response to the review that they disputed the claims they had left the place unclean.

 

Whatever the real story was, I thought I'd give them a chance and I have to say, I didn't really have any cleanliness issues. They were maybe not perfect, but close enough. They left everything cleaner than most. So, I don't know if the previous host had it all wrong, or the guests were just especially conscientous this time because they wanted a better review, or if they had learnt a lesson from last time...

 

Victoria567
Level 10
Scotland, United Kingdom

Hi@Huma

Respectfully might I suggest you remove the part of your review where there is an element of doubt such as......eg not sure if you put your suitcase on the bed?.....not sure what those were, but they looked like blood.....

 

Id just leave the description as Stains, otherwise it’s making you appear that you are jumping to conclusions ( I know you are not, but it’s the intellectually challenged I’m thinking of)

 

This habit of leaving lights on all night, leaving bathroom fans on all night seems to be a habit I’ve particularly noticed from our guests from across the Pond.....maybe their energy costs are a fraction of ours, that we have to endure here, in dear Blighty.

 

So this excessive energy consumption ( in our eyes) is the perfect norm for them, so I’d also remove that part of your private feedback and perhaps I’d suggest.

 

Here in the U.K. along with most of Europe we have cripplingly high costs for domestic energy, hence our strong ingrained habit of switching off ALL electrical appliances and heating when NOT required.

 

I admire you for letting guests use your kitchen......My kitchen is my wee kingdom, which I’m loathe to share with anyone!

I believe it is perfectly correct and acceptable (would go as far as to say obligatory!) in this day and age to request AND expect our Guests to turn off lights, air cons, TVs etc when they exit our AirBnB accommodation.  Thus to tell a Guest who has consistently failed to do this during their stay at your AirBnB is absolutely a plus for all of us! Many thanks