Is Passive-Aggressive Revenge Bad?

[Paul154]

It's high season and I'm enjoying high and easy popularity. I'm close to the airport with convenient bus service. So yesterday I get an inquiry. "blah-blah-blah, You're close to the airport good, blah-blah-blah, Are you close to the light rail?" I roll my eyes. I'm not close to the light rail. As a matter of fact, my airport bus is faster and more convenient. I know I don't want this person and I know this person is looking for an excuse not to book. But i do pre-approve and give her a polite reply explaining my bus situation , knowing I'm wasting my effort. So I wake up, finding her day has been booked by another guest! I'm relieved and happy to have my judgement vindicated. But there is that evil vindictive side of me that revels in denying her a reservation. Am I bad?

[Alice-and-Jeff0]

Nope.  Not at all @Paul154.  I'm glad all the time when people I suspect are going to be troublesome book elsewhere.  I've dodged some real bullets.  

[Andrea9]

@Paul154, nope, just protecting yourself, and good for you another booking came in  🙂

We probably all do it. If somebody inquires where I have doubts and asks for ex. are you far from the center I'll answer a bit less reassuring than otherwise. Or I'll point out the weak situation of my listing as weaker than it is 😉

[Kenneth61]

I suppose it comes down to how much you value your own time. If you are booking a high turnover daily property, is that practical and profitable to begin with? And if you are obsessing on intangibles like your own feelings and non-existent guests, then you have more time than I do. I can't tell you how to run your business, but it sounds like it needs a streamlining. Go to longer rentals, and add in some fees for your trouble. Up your booking requirements, and pre-approve only the best.  Give yourself a rest, unless you just like the psychological drama of being a landlord.

[Alice-and-Jeff0]

@Andrea9 - often times I politely say, "you can find that answer in the "Getting Around" section of my listing. "  and then decline. I'm super sure that the person is going to keep asking me things answered in the listing and I'm just not going to keep engaging them. 

[Andrea9]

@Alice-and-Jeff0

Indeed! I've done that too. In that section it says it'll take only around 12min with all stops to get here by tram or bus, but if I know I'm not that keen on having that person in my guest room I'd be more proned to say "Well it will take you a quarter of an hour by public transport"  🙂

[Annette33]

but @Paul154 , when you pre-approve, as you did, you do run the risk, albeit small, that that person would book with you after all, and then you're trapped!

Just answer, do not use pre-approve or decline: I recently got the confirmation, with @Alice-and-Jeff0 encouragement, that nothing happens to my perfect response rate as long as I just answer the inquiry, short and sweet will do:

I had believed that Airbnb would knock me down in my response rate if I didn't us either one of those two choices - and Airbnb's wording in the rules sure is very obscure and ambiguous regarding this , but I just answered and sat tight:

the inquiry kept sitting in my inbox in red, I got multiple reminders by Airbnb to either pre-approve or decline, it then said (in red) "response overdue" - but when it was all said and done, my response rate stayed at 100%! So all that pressure from Airbnb is a lot of hot air....!

For obvious reasons one may not want to pre-approve, but neither decline prematurely, as too many declines are not good to hve on one's account 

[Mariann4]

Thank you @Annette33.

I just had this question trouble my mind as well. Got an inquiry. Replied. And then became nervous... Had I responded well enough with a reply? Strange thing actually. Airbnb shouldn't have the right to impact my mind like this. But I knew the inquiry was no done deal as the one inquiring was new to Airbnb. And there I was, worrying about my response rate, not wanting to create a new question in CC, and not bothering to take the time to read up.

So on the dashboard I was prompted to respond. But when I clicked on the respond-button I was told: you have already responded to this inquiry. The system obviously has a glitch. Again... I did what I was supposed to but the system only picked up on it on one side and not the other. And I was nervous. So I pushed the pre-approve button to make sure my response rate wouldn't suffer. But now I know. It was enough for me to respond with a reply.

Thank you.

Mariann 🙂

[Annette33]

@Mariann4 , I went through the same worries, especially as Airbnb's wording is not clear at all about it, and me , with my old trained  lawyer mind went at it and analyzed their dubious stand on it and just about came to the conclusion that one has to activate one of those buttons, or it doesn't count as response. Anyhow, now I experienced myself that "just" answering is good enough.

I sur do not like these misleading things Airbnb puts out, just like making Kellyville, OK the default home town for people who don't bother to fill out their profile. Why not just leave it alone? Such things just rattle us hosts - unnecessarily.  

I am making up a catalog of such mildly deceiving things Airbnb has in place, might post it one day...

[Andrea9]

@Annette33 

Those reminders and the ticking clock bother me, so I immediately go to my dashboard, click on 'dismiss' after the inquiry and it will disappear. BTW if you click on 'respond' it will show you that "You have already responded to this inquiry".

What I also do, to clear my mental desk is to archive the inquiry on my inbox. Pouf, another attention thief gone too.

[Farah1]

@Paul154 yesterday I received a reservation request with no greetings, the initial message only say "how far r u from the airport" not even a question mark! I really want to say "18 miles", but I do not want to be like her (I consider her approach is rude/not friendly). So, I replied by addressing her name and gave a thorough professional answer hoping that she realized that maybe on the next message she would say "Hi Farah, what about bla bla bla".... nope, the next message was "is your home close to downtown Seattle?". At that point, I already know that she won't be a good fit because that information is available in the listing and that means she did not bother reading the listing and just throwing questions at me. Based on experience, there will be a pretty good chance that she will not follow house rules/be a complicated guests. I can see some pattern with complicated guests.

[Em4]

@Paul154 they are not a visitor.  they are a customer.  if you don't want them, someone else will take their money.

i have IB so anyone outside the listing conditions will have to communicate first.  myself, i don't take the questions or the way in which they are phrased personally.  if a question has been answered by the house rules and listing info, i just copy and paste.  if its an entirely different question i try to provide the info they think they require.  i rarely preapprove (@Annette33 has pointed out the response choices avail), before questions have been sorted.  i take my cue from the prospective guest.  3/8 times someone in that situation has gone on to make a reservation.  as soon as they have reserved though, my concierge service kicks in.

re @andrea perceived weaknesses in my accommodation provision, i record these in my listings and the host info.  if price is an issue go to the village.  if under 12 yrs age children are an issue there is provision without electric fencing and large machinery in the village.  if distance is an issue, it is only 5 minutes to the village and there is nothing there to compare with Hukawai Lodge and its location.  so generally we come back to price.  public transport is not an issue here, since there isn't any.  transport from an airport is also not an issue, since the closest international airport is 5 hrs away.  without exception atleast 90% of travellers arrive with a vehicle.  to Hukawai Lodge, 100%.

re passive-aggression, its not my thing.  but i can certainly understand that after some time in the game dealing with people, that certain patterns can become onerous, monotonous and tedious.  i am very direct in my listings.  this intentionally acts as a filter.  on the ground i am exceptionally amenable although i won't tolerate BS.  my goal is to provide my full range of skills to guests in order to make their stay as memorable and non memorable as they choose.  and since i now have a season (+-40 days) under my belt, i no longer rate the review system as highly as i did before starting.  its my opinion that there is no managing every personality type.  people will do what they will do.  and the review system is a tool of power wielded negatively by generally the passive aggressive.  i just try every day to do the best i can.

otherwise i agree with @Kenneth61 a little business streamlining might help reduce the pressure you might feel when dealing with certain personality types.

🙂

Em

Hukawai Lodge

Franz Josef, NZ

https://www.airbnb.co.nz/rooms/15418840

[David126]

Somebody contacted me wanting to stay but wanting a third off. I was on the road so not exactly a rush to reply situation, it was for that night but a busy time and only for a night and there is a point where it is not worth it.

So I get home unload and there is another request at the regular price, hit accept.

I then have to break the news to the discounters that I have no availablity and am not aware of anywhere that would meet their price point and trust they found somewhere to stay.

[Susie5]

@David126, you've hit on my pet peeve - the ones whose first communication is, "will you cut your price for me?"  I almost always say no, sorry, no can do.  The one or two times I engaged in a dialogue about it didn't turn out especially well - those were uncommunicative guests just looking for the cheapest place to stay, some of whom smoked on my premises despite my no-smoking policy.  

I had one person who was here with her family but she was doing a fundraising walk and wouldn't be there for one of the nights - she asked for a price break on that night, and I said no.  Then I found her husband's brother had come to stay for that night in her bed!  She was determined to get her dollar's worth.

I wonder if they realize how that first contact about money comes across! 

[Andrea9]

@Susie5

"I wonder if they realize how that first contact about money comes across! "

They don't! Some think they are being smart and for others it's a cultural thing.

I had somebody (landscape profile - go figure!) just name an inacceptable amount in his inquiry, and when I would accept it he started criticising me on my listing as to why it wasn't worth my asking price!!!

To let out my frustration I vented on my local FB group and found out from 2 other hosts in my area of town (where the inquirer had wanted to visit a pal) had gotten very similar inquiries, and the woman too got follow up messages about why her price should be lower.

When one can detach from the irritation, it's even quite humorous...