My cleaning person passed out drunk on the floor of the Airbnb

[Inna22]

My dear friends, I usually bring you stories of my crazy guests. Some even say that I am a magnet for those. I take offence at that as it is false. I am not a magnet for crazy guests, I am a magnet for crazy people in general.

On Sunday a new cleaning person has started. She seemed to be very sharp with prior experience, asked all the correct questions. I left after a while and she texted me a few times with relevant questions. Eventually texting stopped. I assumed that she either ran out of questions or was busy cleaning. I came back about 10 minutes to guests arrival to check her work and to greet the guest. She was on all four swaying back and forth a little. I thought: she must be cleaning a spot on the floor thoroughly, how great. She then got up and continued to sway. So I thought she got up to fast and got a blood rush to her head. She then plopped back on the floor and started to feel with her hand for her glasses that were oddly somewhere in the corner of the room. So I thought she must be completely blind without her glasses. But then when she attempted to vacuum on all four, I have run out of excuses. I asked her if she happened to have a drink and she said that as a matter of fact she did. I then saw a garbage bag with an empty bottle of white wine and about 6 empty cans of hard cider, all full in the morning and left behind by previous guests. I looked around and realized almost nothing was done.

I was quickly trying to figure out if my first priority was to start cleaning or kick out the drunk cleaning person who at that point was sort of laying on the floor.

I decided that cleaning person comes first, particularly since she is a ticking bomb as far as barfing. As I was shoving her out the door, the guest texted me letting me know he was running late. For those of you who complain about guests being late, I can not relate. This was one of the happiest texts of my life. While I was cleaning bathrooms, changing linens and mopping floors with a speed of a cartoon character, I received a text from the cleaning woman: didn't you like my cleaning? When will I get paid? At least I know she was alive.

[Liz701]

what a nightmare but glad it worked out in the end with your guests (despite some speedy cleaning on your part!) 🙂

[Helen427]

@Inna22 

Unfortunately your story whilst it has it's funny side & perhaps you are taking the mickey, it's probably a little more common than some realise.

Some need serious help for alcohol & drug related issues who resort to doing cleaning jobs as they are unemployable in other jobs as they would be more readily found out.

We used to have a cleaner in a local motel who it's beyond belief how she got the job, she rolled up to work whatever time suited her, didn't give a toss what time she entered Guests rooms or what boundaries she crossed in those people's rooms or lives - one can find out what they want very easily when one has no morals or common decency.

She had serious alcohol & drug issues and a personality disorder.

Be careful who you let in your homes, vet them, check backgrounds of those they use as references.

[Kevin1322]

I know a man who has been three times in rehab, yet has been turned down for state benefits because he turned down a job working in a bar.

A nicer man (sober) you could not meet. A military veteran, charity volunteer,  and a functioning alcoholic  holding down a highly skilled job as a stonemason for most of his after-army life, sent two kids to university, falls off the wagon a couple of times a year.  A whole life of one step forward two steps back.

There but for the grace of god......

[Susan17]

@Helen427 

"Some need serious help for alcohol & drug related issues who resort to doing cleaning jobs as they are unemployable in other jobs as they would be more readily found out"

Addiction is a classless disease, it doesn't discriminate. You can be sure that there are just as many hosts, guests and high-flying executives out there struggling with drug and alcohol related issues, as there are cleaners.

https://www.seasidepalmbeach.com/recovery-blog/google-execs-heroin-overdose-shines-light-silicon-val...

"She had serious alcohol & drug issues and a personality disorder".

Yep. A shockingly high percentage of those with substance use problems, also suffer from concurrent mental health disorders. It's called dual diagnosis, or COD (co-occurring disorders), and unfortunately, effective integrated care (the blending of interventions into a single coherent treatment package) can be extremely difficult - if not impossible - for patients to access, as successive governments worldwide have abjectly failed to put the appropriate measures in place to deal with the growing crisis. (Currently, only an estimated 7% of dual diagnosis sufferers are fortunate enough to be receiving the proper treatment)

https://www.irishtimes.com/life-and-style/health-family/plight-of-those-with-dual-diagnosis-most-evi...

"...when one has no morals or common decency"

Without ever knowing what travesties, traumas, or tragedies may have brought a person to a certain point in their lives - and until one has walked a mile in their shoes - it's probably best not to speculate on their morals or their decency. 

[Elena87]

@Inna22 

I think obviously the cleaning lady made a schoolgirl error by drinking the left behind grog in the wrong order

Cider after wine = you'll be fine

Wine after cider = you'll be a collider

[Inna22]

@Elena87 this is too funny

[Casita-By-The-Texas-Bay0]

What a story! At least you can see the funny after the fact!

Thanks for sharing!

[Cathie19]

Epic story @Inna22 .  Great insights from our fellow hosts here.... @Casita-By-The-Texas-Bay0 , @Helen427 , @Elena87, @Casita-By-The-Texas-Bay0, @Susan17 , @Anonymous , @Sarah977 & @Pat271.

Inna, have you considered that the next time the cleaner contacts you for her cleaning fee, that you respond with the total cost of the full ciders and wine she drank, PLUS the labour / emergency call out fee  of the “other excellent cleaner” who recognised your dire emergency, and  who stepped in to undertake the job at such short notice! 

[Inna22]

@Cathie19 Love that!

[Susan1404]

@Inna22- I needed a good laugh for today and your post provided that!  I can't imagine the stress you suffered when you realized you needed to do the cleaning with lightning speed!  Have to say I think you missed your calling in life and that was to be a writer.  Hope you find a reliable cleaning person for the future. 🙂

[Inna22]

@Susan1404 thank you, but I usually have an attention span for just a short story like this one and even that is full of typos. I will just use this forum as my literary outlet. Luckily, Airbnb business provides for a lot of material

[G-C-R-M0]

@Inna22  - If there's airbnb "Best of", this should make it in there!!
You got my vote!!!

All the best to you, your cleaning crew situation, and good luck to the cleaning lady hope she gets the help to manage that addiction (or maybe she was just really thirsty and couldn't find water?)

[Kevin1322]

@Inna22  absolutely made me laugh out loud. You legend.

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

hahahaha 😄 aaaa 

[Sudsrung0]

We had some guest checking out one evening we had gone there to say goodbye as you do when they had gone I go around the villa to check and turn all the light off this was 5 bedroom,

Looked in the fridge to see if anything needed to be thrown away just drink and bottles of water so I leave them the cleaner will be here tomorrow we allow the cleaner to drink what she needs when she's working.

I know what time she will be there so later I called her but no answer I am nearby so I drive to see her and she's sitting there almost past out, What happened she's drunk one of them bottles of water in the fridge was full of vodka she had probably drank half in one go as it get hot here, my biggest worry is she could have fell in the pool it's a big pool and the house is built around it,

Another problem was she didn't have any credit's on her phone this villa is really private with a high wall around it and no immediate neighbors a cry for help would have fell on deaf ears.

From now on only drink from bottles that are sealed we have loads in the storeroom and dont go to work with no credits on your phone, too lazy to stop and get some