My cleaning person passed out drunk on the floor of the Airbnb

Inna22
Level 10
Chicago, IL

My cleaning person passed out drunk on the floor of the Airbnb

My dear friends, I usually bring you stories of my crazy guests. Some even say that I am a magnet for those. I take offence at that as it is false. I am not a magnet for crazy guests, I am a magnet for crazy people in general.

 

On Sunday a new cleaning person has started. She seemed to be very sharp with prior experience, asked all the correct questions. I left after a while and she texted me a few times with relevant questions. Eventually texting stopped. I assumed that she either ran out of questions or was busy cleaning. I came back about 10 minutes to guests arrival to check her work and to greet the guest. She was on all four swaying back and forth a little. I thought: she must be cleaning a spot on the floor thoroughly, how great. She then got up and continued to sway. So I thought she got up to fast and got a blood rush to her head. She then plopped back on the floor and started to feel with her hand for her glasses that were oddly somewhere in the corner of the room. So I thought she must be completely blind without her glasses. But then when she attempted to vacuum on all four, I have run out of excuses. I asked her if she happened to have a drink and she said that as a matter of fact she did. I then saw a garbage bag with an empty bottle of white wine and about 6 empty cans of hard cider, all full in the morning and left behind by previous guests. I looked around and realized almost nothing was done.

I was quickly trying to figure out if my first priority was to start cleaning or kick out the drunk cleaning person who at that point was sort of laying on the floor.

 

I decided that cleaning person comes first, particularly since she is a ticking bomb as far as barfing. As I was shoving her out the door, the guest texted me letting me know he was running late. For those of you who complain about guests being late, I can not relate. This was one of the happiest texts of my life. While I was cleaning bathrooms, changing linens and mopping floors with a speed of a cartoon character, I received a text from the cleaning woman: didn't you like my cleaning? When will I get paid? At least I know she was alive.

56 Replies 56
Kira32
Level 10
Canary Islands, Spain

@Inna22 

 

It's funny that she had the guts to ask for money. LOL!😂

Kat84
Level 10
San Pedro, Philippines

She needs them for that cider 😁

Sheryl93
Level 2
New Jersey, United States

I have to admit this is pretty comical but I don't know how I would have handled that. Good job on getting her out of your home. I would have probably called an Uber and not pay her. Glad she made it home safely.  

As I am just starting out, I still enjoy doing the cleaning myself. I get great exercise  by going up and down three flights of stairs every day and I'm one of those people who feels that only I can clean and sanitize my rooms to my satisfaction.  I hope that I will always have the energy and desire to do so.

All the best with your next cleaning person.

More funny stories please.  🙂

A little late to the party here (heh, heh, heh)... I enjoyed that you assumed the best, that your cleaner was drunk was your last observation rather than your first assumption!  Hilarious story, sad situation, glad you ended up with time to get your place cleaned up for your next guests.  

Kat84
Level 10
San Pedro, Philippines

More funny stories 🙂

 

Well, my cleaner was always a bit drunk, but there was no evidence. No bottles of white wine, no cans of cider 😁

 

I had more problems with the guests always complaining about "the smell of the cigarette". Seven people wrote messages in the guestbook (how lucky I am that I have a guestbook!) that room smells like a cigarette. Few people were posting bad reviews online...

 

I was wondering how come people are so brave to smoke when I scare them with no smoking policy, penalties, etc? I can't come inside the unit due to their privacy and watch them 24/7...

 

Until one day I got this IMG-3b9e55b29c2e61c1531f3fbed5143d32-V.jpg

The guest just checked in and sent me that photo. I had to say sorry many times... What a shame. It's my cleaner, who was smoking inside the toilet while I was going crazy trying to catch my guests, who "smoke"! 

@Kat84 no way! I am glad you eventually figured it out!

Kat84
Level 10
San Pedro, Philippines

And I am glad that you caught your cleaner early, so she wasn't able to bring much damage

Kanani2
Level 6
Albuquerque, NM

It's both horrible and funny!

Cathy504
Level 2
Puerto Peñasco, Mexico

Inna,

You cracked me up. I laughed so loud that I just woke up the house! 🤣

 

I have been doing this a long time and have often contemplated my own worse scenario, from using tongs to pick up & dispose of used condoms, to beautiful dish ware left on the patio with old guacamole being consumed delightedly by cockroaches to the guest that thought doing a charcoal cleanse while on vacation was a good idea and I had to replace all linens, repaint the wall, reupholster a chair and remove/replace the grout and new blinds all sprayed with black charcoal; of course the gust denied it..... I was so livid and determined to not comply with her disrespect, but rather found my own respect in dumpster diving until I found the deactivated charcoal!  Wow, Airbnb was so fantastic in assisting to collect the costs that exceeded the damages.

 

in truth, my sincere congratulations on actually checking! A mistake that many hosts don't do and 'assume' that it's being done. I had an old cleaning person that said I was a "Special kind of Picky" (I accepted the title like a gold at the olympics). I have no problem getting down & dirty to scrub floors or show new housekeepers the best/most efficient cleaning methods, which also saves on expenses over time of wasted products or not recycling properly. (Why not use the remaining roll of paper towels to finish the glass cleaning? Some housekeepers will open a new roll just for that & throw out the old roll.!😤 (This attention also saves your furniture from incorrect cleaning with abrasive chemicals etc...)

 

As I have grown and manage many units; I have Scaled UP to do both Pre-Arrival inspections as well as Post Departure inspections prior to housekeeping entering.   While this sounds encumbersome; here is the benefit: It puts controls in place to prevent any he/she said claims that are not valid, along with us finding valuables guests leave behind so we can return to them, additionally,  we document any discoveries with photos should a claim arise to protect ourselves (both from less than stellar guests, but also from repair/cleaning contractors) After some time, I eventually had to hire up to continue my standards.  While this was fearful to take on additional expenses, it allowed me to grow my business in marketing and more personal attention to my guests!  I AM QUITE PROUD OF OUR MANY ,MANY REVIEWS FOCUSED ON CLEANLINESS!!!  

 

We all know the Golden Rule, treat others as you would want to be treated.  I personally want every guest to have the very best experience just as I would want.  I don't know if it's their first vacation in 20 years, or possibly their last one together, but I do want them to make memories to last a lifetime. 🤗

 

Happy Hosting Inna, 

 

Cathy

Sean-And-Jenn2
Level 2
Burlington, MA

This is hysterical! We are both crying over here at this post it’s so funny, and horrific. We are trying to figure out what we would have done. And she asked about getting paid?!?! You should have sent her an invoice for the booze! I will never complain about my cleaners again. 
Jenn and Sean 

Linda1213
Level 6
Vero Beach, FL

OMG..... but smiling ear to ear!! ‘Fast as a cartoon character’ bwahhh

LBR

Your stories are hilarious but this takes the cake. I am glad you were able to finish and get the place together for your guests and  the cleaning lady is ok