So I am currently at a airbnb and there are two rooms in the apartment. I am here for about 10 days. Upon arriving my host say that starting on the third day she won't be here throughout my stay(which is fine if she was, I was only getting one private room.) We're here on the 6th day and in the middle of the night I here loud music coming from the living room -heavy metal. It sounds like a movies or something- she entertaining her boyfriend. After about 45 mins I go to the kitchen to get water and to see if maybe they can turn in down some- It's loud and a very small apartment. I ended up walking in on them having sex. How should I handle the situation? My problem is not with the sex- just the inconsideration seeing that she had a whole empty bedroom she could have used. I'm not a friend who's shacking up . I am a guest who PAYED to stay here.
@Morocco2 yup, definitely inappropriate. I know things can happen in a moment of passion but the loud music in the middle of the night alone is not ok when you have paying guests who are trying to sleep, let alone having sex in an area that's accessible to guests. Awkward to say the least!
@Morocco2 did the host see you? If so, I think you need to have an immediate conversation. If not, I would let her know gently that noise travels in the space, and say that she might not be aware of just how much it does. If you are a male and she is a female, any mention of the actual encounter can possibly make her feel as though you were peeping (which I am sure you were not) so tread lightly. I would keep it to the noise.
You would think a host would be a little more conscious of this stuff. Wow. I am sorry this happened to you.
@Laura2592 It's not so much about noise, but why would you have sex in a common area??????????? when you have guests in the house???????? It's true a woman may make such an accusation, but how can it be 'peeping' when she and her partner are in the living room, not the bathroom, not the bedroom, but the common space that is shared with guests?????
@Mark116 I wouldn't have sex in a common area with a guest in the house, nor do I think most people would. Totally gross. But I mention gender just so that the guest doesn't get a clap back review where the female host accuses a male guest of spying. Not at all what I think happened, but something to be aware of. I am sure the host is embarrassed. I would not want the guest to put themselves in a situation where they had to be on the defensive.
There are a lot of threads about guests not being careful or quiet about their romantic activities during a stay. Noise in a shared space is a safe topic to mention. Seeing someone in the altogether is awkward and I am sure neither guest nor host wants that feedback.
@Laura2592 It's sad that the guest could be seen as liable in such a situation, but you're right.
I kind of doubt that the host is embarrassed, because if she were embarrassed she would have gone to her own bedroom and the whole situation wouldn't have happened. It is gross. We are so used to hearing horror stories of dumb guests, but there are some truly wacky hosts out there too.
@Mark116 yeah, it takes a certain kind of mentality to do something like that. Sadly I had a housemate years ago who liked to exhibit all of her encounters in common spaces because she was under the (mistaken) impression that people wanted to see her. If you mentioned how uncomfortable it made you, it was your problem as what she was doing was "natural". Some folks have an exhibitionistic streak. But man, that is really truly incompatible with being a host! I feel for the OP. If it were me, I would look elsewhere to spend the remainder of my stay
I'd class it more as exhibitionism on the host's part, than voyeurism on the guest's part.
Also... heavy metal music?? Can't imagine a worse soundtrack for a roll around the living room.. 😂
@Morocco2 Wow. People really are crazy. I can't imagine doing something like that. It's difficult because obviously this is a very sensitive issue, since you're the guest and it is the host's home. I would knock the host on the stars though, because having sex in a shared space is RIDICULOUS. Without opening yourself up to getting in trouble, the best I can think is to ask the host to possibly keep things 'quiet' in the common areas during the night...but such a totally clueless person, it will probably make no difference. I might seriously consider asking airbnb to rehouse in this case.
I am a woman. Yeah, I don't think the host saw me, but her partner did I believe. I just quickly went back to my room - it was the middle of the night. Everything till this point has just be fine, no complaints whatso ever. It just put a bad taste in my mouth and makes me really consider finding a new place for the last few days.
@Morocco2- is there a possibility that your host forgot you were staying there? Not trying to defend your host, but just wondering if there might be a valid reason for all of the loud music and exhibitionism. I agree with @Mark116 - definitely knock the host on stars because at the very least, no matter what the reason, you are owed a sincere apology.
I don't think so, I explained to her the purpose of my stay when I was checking in- she cleared out half her closet for me to hang things up. It's almost a two week stay! Yeah I don't feel unsafe, just a little disgusted and annoyed. I think I'll just write it in my review!
@Morocco2 I wouldn't get into too many specifics in your review, airbnb sometimes pulls review if they feel it's an invasion of privacy. I'd say something more generic, like the host made you uncomfortable by behaving inappropriately and loudly in the common space, something like that.
@Morocco2 Don't blame you at all for being annoyed and disgusted. It's beyond unprofessional to do that as a host in a common area. If that is the only part of your stay that was negative, you can always have a chat with her on the day you check out and just say how uncomfortable that made you and she should be more aware of her surroundings and who is in the apartment.
Interesting. I would've been a little taken aback. I guess I was more shocked when my guest said that I personally offended him. I asked him how he said well look at you I wasn't exactly expecting someone with your skin colour! His lame girlfriend was the one who booked, not that jerk face. I told them there is a picture of my pretty freckled brown skin in my picture. I called Airbnb. They were totally helpless. In the meantime they stayed in my bed for 1 hour covers messy, and all. They refunded their money back within about 1/2 hour. It took me close to 1 month to get $50 for the cleaning fee. You have no idea what I went through.