NASTY NEW YEARS GUESTS

[Tatyana5]

Do other hosts seem to get a mixed bag of either lovely or ungrateful, overly demanding guests on the holidays? I am beginning to wonder if I am cursed with terrible, impossible-to-please guests on the holidays. I have awful New Years guests and today I feel sad and uncomfortable in my home... I worked an entire year to recover from last years entitled, winter holiday nasties. Dreading that my excellent rating will again be destroyed by another awful couple that should have stayed in a hotel or at home.

I don't want to sound ungreatful myself: Most of my guests are wonderful! Most follow basic etiquette (or are fair/apologetic when they do not). Most are extremely positive about the accommodation and the extra care they get,  on top of a great deal of an entire, temporary home for the price of a single hotel room.

My last years New Years guests were snotty and entitled, but this years guests have topped them! There have been mishaps. (It’s a lot to maintain.) It’s tough for everyone on major holidays. The property is beautiful and beautifully furnished, but it is FAR from perfect. It is not a hotel (and not a hotel price either). Mishaps happen – especially at busy times. We are all human. Cannot get my head around ungracious people like this.

Unfortunately this year there was a last minute problem with the fridge thermostat not keeping a good enough temperature over the winter holidays…

These people were so rude and unthankful for my efforts to fix the problem. Nothing was enough. Not one ‘thank you’ or show of understanding. Even though I offered money off, as well as immediately working to provide a replacement fridge the same night (which I fully acknowledged was not ideal and apologies profusely for).

Even though I am a relatively small-framed female, it was too much to ask the husband for help bringing the replacement fridge inside. Even though the problem occurred over the Christmas/New Years season there was no allowances made. Even though I dealt with the matter that night, when I arrived (giving them my own fridge/freezer) I was snapped at that ‘it was a terrible time to come!’. Even though I had lugged such a heavy thing 3/4 of the way by myself and the husband is 30’something, again I was snapped at that the husband was busy and I should have found someone else to help me carry the heavy thing over the fence – yes at night in the countryside, just before New Years.

Maybe it’s shark mentality. You know, ‘blood in the water’? I have found that while some people will be satisfied when they are shown respect and remorse for a mistake (especially if they are given a monetary discount as well) others go for the throat.

QUESTIONS PLEASE:

1) Does anyone have any advice on how much money I should give off? I refunded the full cleaning fee to the people before.

2) I don’t feel comfortable leaving a neutral review for these ‘guests’. They were pretty awful about the fridge (And they were just generally charmless before the incident – not responding to my repeat messages requesting their ETA. Then being unfriendly when I arrived 20 minutes after they came. I had no idea when they would come and they had written instructions that they were free to enter the property and make themselves comfortable.)

STORY FOR THOSE WHO FEEL LIKE READING:

Guests before Christmas left the fridge it full of stuff and the door slightly open. With the heating on, after a week I guess it broke the thermostat. True, my fault for not noticing. We are all human. I wasn’t sure if it was broken, because I only found out 2 hours before the Christmas guests arrived. It is no surprise that I could neither get the fridge fixed, nor a new one delivered during this time… The Christmas guests said it wasn’t bad and left writing a lovely note thanking me for a “special and perfect Christmas”. The fridge unfortunately did stink of fish/meat after. So, I offered money-off to the pre-New Years back-to-back guests who came in between. They also said the issue wasn’t that bad… Regardless, I couldn’t get anything delivered, but was convinced the fridge was at an acceptable level (a part from it being freezing outside just in case.

So the New Years Guests…

It started with them not answering my repeated requests to give their arrival time. It’s not a big deal to me if people don’t answer straight away, but by 2pm they still hadn’t responded at all (check in is flexible after 3pm). They’ve booked 6 weeks before and I haven’t heard a thing from them since. In my limited 1.5 years experience people like this tend to show up between 8 and10 pm, but at this point I am not even sure if they are coming at all because there has been no contact.

Like most of us over the holidays I have back-to-backs. Like most of us, my interest is to make the property clean and comfortable. time is extremely tight – unless I didn’t actually clean everything thoroughly or maybe had a team of people. If I know guests are coming after 3pm, it gives me time to spend some extra effort doing extra nice things for them (flowers etc). This time I was spending extra time cleaning and deodorising the faulty fridge.

If I know they are coming at 3pm I stop at 2:30 so I can tidy up to be there to greet them, but I still hadn’t heard anything. At 2:50pm I finished cleaning, left the door unlocked, raced back to the main house to have a quick shower and dress. At 3pm I leave a final text saying I am occupied for the next 20 min, by the off chance they arrive, but say I will be over shortly. (It also says to go into the house and my listing and my more detailed instructions.) Simultaneously they text for the first time to say they will be there in 10 minutes.

I arrive at 3:20 as promised to stony faces from both of them. ???

I explain about the fridge, apologise, offer money off… It sounds like it isn’t really okay with them. The fridge is’t cold enough. So I say give me some time, that I have an old fridge but I’ll need to clean it and think where to put the thing so as not to inconvenience them further. They seem to accept the compromise.

I have a beautiful old Smeg fridge, and yet another, but both were really dirty and I wasn’t sure how well they worked. From their attitude, it was pretty obvious these were going to be difficult to please guests. Long story short: to avoid further problems I decided to give them my fridge. Large and kind of ugly, but at least I am sure it works.

I return to explain what’s happening and confirm if it is okay to come back a lot later - 2 hours maybe. I suggest to put the replacement fridge in the front room/dining room in an unused area. Okay, not ideal and it spoils the prettiness of the place, but this way they don’t need to go outside. Husband says fine.

Spend next 2 hours thoroughly cleaning and sanitising my fridge. Dismantle part of my kitchen and my old conservatory to get the thing out! Haul it through the sodden, Suffolk soil on my own in the dark… I am 5’6” – not tiny anymore, but not at all a big woman. It’s a BIG fridge. At the little fence that divides the two properties (about 3/4 of the way) I go to the guests’ entrance. Knock on the door. Nothing… Knock again. Wife comes out and snaps at me in a nasty tone =>

Wife: “Yes?!…

Me: “Please can Husband[name withheld] came and help me get the fridge in?”

Wife: “He’s putting the baby to bed!…You’ve come at a bad time! This is in fact the worst time you could have come!” (Still snapping in a very rude tone and I am just standing there totally gobsmacked by her attitude and tone of voice, which is close to yelling.)

Me: “Uhhhm, uhh, uhh. I am not sure what to do. Do you mean I should leave and come back later? Or… do you not want me to come back at all” (Not in a nasty tone, just bewildered and worried this is turning out as it has.)

Her: “Don’t you have someone to help you?!”

Me: (I’m thinking:…’Yes, sure I’ll just get that groundsman that works 24/7, for free and doesn’t take holidays off,’ but don’t say this.)

At this point I am so totally shocked by this woman’s lack of humanity, I mutter something about dealing with it myself (with no idea of how) and just walk away without continuing the conversation or trying to ameliorate the situation as I would normally.

Husband comes out a bit later to find me unsuccessfully trying to lever the fridge over the fence into a wheelbarrow in the dark. I am almost in  tears at this point and mutter something like: “I just don’t understand [your attitude]. Sorry, I just don’t understand. Your stay is important to me. Don’t you see it is important to me? What else do you want me to do? I’m trying to fix the problem. I said I’d give you money off. I am sorry.”

Husband: shrugs and mutters something off-handedly like “It will be alright.”

We get the fridge in. Again I say I hope it is good enough and apologise yet again reminding him I will still take the money off. Again he kind of off-handedly just acknowledges that he has heard my words and at least they have a colder fridge now for their child’s food.

AND FINALLY

It’s a 175 year old house in the countryside. Things happen. You cannot just snap you fingers in the countryside – especially not on the busiest days of the year! If there ever is a problem, I always make amends by showing remorse and trying to fix it immediately. I always make it clear that I take their holiday seriously. I usually offer monetary compensation. From my experience this is above what a hotel might do in the same situation.

Most people know what they are getting with a B&B and even when things don’t go perfectly, the trade off of having a whole home for less than one room with bathroom in a hotel, plus amenities, plus personal service etc is more than enough. Honestly, I host because I NEED the money. But it is definitely not just the money; if it were I wouldn’t have the ‘cutsy’ type of accomodation that I have. (I definitely wouldn’t spend £200 per bed on sheets, when I know I could get the same rent on polycotton). It is so, so important to me that people have a lovely experience staying here.

I know I probably take it too seriously… Opffh it just really, really gets me down.

Really makes me want to stop hosting.

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

@Tatyana5 

As usual, @Sarah977  already wrote what I think, thank you Sarah 🙂

I would just finish one of her sentences in another way:  ".... In the meantime you can put your food on the balcony or on the window, luckily, it's winter, or you may cancel and find another accommodation "

There is no way I would struggle to transport a fridge and risk to hurt myself. No way!

[Tatyana5]

Hello Branka & Silvia!

Don't you think? It is frigid outside!

Yes, honestly I don't have the confidence to be stern with them and actually internally immediately take THEIR side (at least up until they start pulling the entitlement attitude like these people did). Up until that point, I am listing what else isn't perfect about the property, what could be better and imaging any other reasons for their lack of graciousness. It is a lovely B&B – if I do say so myself – and I would be thrilled to stay here if I were a B&B guest... but there are definitely foibles and it is not perfect.

Funny enough in my past career – when I was much younger – I didn't suffer nonsense from unreasonable customers in my shops!... Now it somehow feels so incredibly personal when it's a question of guests in my own home.

I want everything to be good for them and get super guilty and worried if they are unhappy.  I am my own enemy in this but I am learning.  ;D

Thank you!  I have favourited your cute apartments in Zagreb.

xx

[Sarah977]

@Tatyana5  Life can be so unfair- just think how different it would have been if you'd had the type of guests whose focus was on having a good time and said "Good thing it's winter! We'll just keep our refrigerated food out in the car for now. Don't stress out, dear, I'm sure you'll be able to get it fixed soon, and Happy New Year."

[Tatyana5]

I so much was thinking exactly the same thing!

xx

😄

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

Lol @Sarah977  I left my previous message before reading yours 😄 Jesus, we always think the same way, it becomes scary 😄

[Sarah977]

@Branka-and-Silvia0  We're just doing our best to have these thoughts out there in both hemispheres 🙂 

I was actually going to suggest that she tell the guest to put their food outside, but living n Mexico where there's all kinds of critters, and before that in Canada, where there were bears and cougars, I considered that it might not be a good idea to just put food outside, depending on what wildlife there is around Tatyana's place. But of course, having to tell guests they could deal with the lack of a fridge in the winter by storing their food outside, perhaps in an animal-proof container, isn't somehing you'd have to tell a person who had any common sense or adaptive skills.

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

@Sarah977  Very soon after we start hosting i realized I shouldn't rely on anyone's common sense. Hosting is very similar to baby sitting, we have to tell, write the note and draw a picture even for most common and logic simple everyday tasks. Like, lock the door behind you, open the window if you feel too hot, close the window if you are cold, inhale, exhale ... 😛

[Sarah977]

@Branka-and-Silvia0  I think babysitting was easier and the kids a lot smarter than some of these guests 🙂 At least you could tell them it was bedtime and then get some peace.

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

@Sarah977  yeah... at least kids are under supervision 24/7 and you can have a baby monitor in their room 🙂

[Tatyana5]

They have private parking, a large driveway to themselves. So really they could have left the food in their car. It is very cold out. I honestly just didn't have the nerve to tell them that... Then they started talking about their baby and that they had a fish pie and food was for him. (And the poor child has literally been shrieking since they shut the door - ALL HOURS, ALMOST NONSTOP –  so it's playing on my mind that he must be very ill). Uff! Just not nice.

[Rowena29]

hi @Tatyana5 ,

Boy, really an unpleasant experience for you.  You've been given lots of good advice, and I particularly agree with @Sarah977 's contribution for what it's worth.

Just one more thing that I would suggest.

There is nothing drives me crazier than guests who don't reply to my messages. I'm a remote host, I NEED to know what's going on.   So, from bitter experience and begin very badly burned on several occasions, one of my first house rules is ...

"COMMUNICATE. Just a bit. PLEASE keep an eye on your  inbox. Especially just after you've booked, AND a few days before arrival. Sometimes I have to give you information or ask a question. PLEASE ANSWER so I know you have read and understood. Just a few words is fine. More is fine too. Feel free to ask questions yourself at any time."

  And further along in the house rules I specifically mention check in time,  and say

" *CHECK IN starts at 2 pm onward. Please let us know when you plan to arrive. We know plans can change - JUST LET US KNOW – the earlier the better - no one likes hanging around waiting for 2 hours. We DON'T live nearby. This is a regular house on a regular street and there is no “hotel” reception. Just us. Waiting. "   

Within all these rules I hide a code word. When a guest IB's their first message in the pre booking message is Have you REALLY read my house rules? What's the code word?

So  by the time they book, they've been more or less forced to get a least a glimmer of what I expect.  

I have repeatedly found that guests who book and don't communicate or reply to messages, are guests who are trouble.  I'm sure there are exceptions, but in my experience they tend to be the "this is just like a hotel, I've booked, that's it" mentality.   If I've asked a question of a guest and they don't reply for a few days ( even if it's a booking some time away) I get CS to ring up and make contact with them.  CS say to them "Host has been messaging you and you haven't replied.  Can you please make contact.  CS usually take the time to educate the guest a little on how they shoudl be treating the platform.

If the guest replies,  they are usually on the back foot and I usually find this brings them to heel, so to speak.  Sometimes they are just naive.   ( BTW CS have always been willing to ring when I ask them, but always try to get ME to do it. I just thank them politely and tell them I'd feel SO much more comfortable if they rang, it gives the call more credibility and it ensures everything is kept on the record. They've never not rung for me)

If, after CS has made contact/left a message,  they  guest STILL doesnt' reply/respond within 24 - 48 hours,  I would have absolutely no hesitation in cancelling the booking via CS. (This is why it's clever to get CS to ring them in the first instance - you've created a trail).  I would very particularly do this over a peak holiday period - you will almost certainly get re booked anyway.

since I"ve become a Nazi about this, I've not had any really awful guests. Still problems of course, but no guests that I feel sick to the pit of my stomach about as i'm driving away, thinking, "I dont' really want these people in my lovely home"   It's SO  much easier to handle things if you can  prevent the wrong type of guests coming at all,  rather than have to deal with them when they arrive.  

I"ve gone on a bit, Hope this is of some help, and do hope you are feeling a bit cheerier.  In a couple of months or so, when you are feeling less fragile,  your nasty experience will make a terrific dining out story - especially if you act it out, demonstrating the fridge going over the fence into a wheelbarrow.  Cheers

[Tatyana5]

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply and I definitely don't think you have 'gone on' . Hahaah. I am the last person who could accuse someone of that.

I enjoyed reading your comment.. It is great advice. To shield myself from the entitled and inconsiderate I actually had a fair amount of instructions in different places about things like the importance of keeping me posted about arrival, why they shouldn't come early either, what the quirks are with my property etc. etc. I think(?) I actually took advice from one of your other posts in our forums? Immediately after the existing incident, I made sure there are not just 2, but 3 places where I give instructions about these guidelines. I changed it from not only saying that they need to keep me updated about what is going on, but specifically that they MUST give me ETA... I ended up doing the same thing after other bad guests – te people who threw a fit that there was electric heating, but no central heating (in spring) for example. I may even make it stricter still. Will re-read it.

[Anna8386]

Excellent advice! I might use it. I too, after almost 600 bookings, find that guests who barely communicate (and when they do, it's short & terse in the bad sense) are not great guests. They don't appreciate the opportunity to have a unique experience with a local host at a much better price. Thanks, Rowena!

[Rowena29]

@Anna8386 I'm hardly the voice of experience - i've not been hosting ALL that long, but I do read and think and ponder and tweak quite a lot. Ironically, it's highly likely we will move away from  airbnb and STR altogether - at least for our current listing. Not for any dramatic reason other than we''ve now done the most of the first round of renos, and after a year it's seems pretty apparent we can make quite a bit more for Long term rental as well as save huge amounts of time ( I live 1.5 hours away from the listing).  We knew this when we started  - but it suited us to have the flexibility to work on the house on weekends between guests.

BTW - when you are specifically talking to another user, if you want to be sure they read it, you need to "tag" them - ie use the @ symbol and then type their user name. Then users will get an alert that you've tagged them.  Didnt really matter in this instance as you were just making a comment, but if you'd been asking a question, you might have never have got a answer.  Only saw this by chance...

[Anna8386]

Tatyanna, let me first say I completely, 100% understand and agree with you! How absolutely ridiculous of these guests to behave that way. I've had close to 600 stays, and I've found that less than 1% of guests act this way, but when they do, it is SOOOOOO unpleasant and downright stressful. 

You stated so clearly the reasons why guests shouldn't act this way: 1) we hosts are human 2) it's just 1 person managing on a short time frame 3) we go above and beyond to make them have a comfortable and delightful stay and 4) it's WAAAAAAAAY less than a hotel!  

To answer your questions, I think a 15% discount would be very reasonable. Your place is adorable and spacious (I just looked at the entire listing and reviews) and is already very reasonably priced.  And I would leave an honest review. Guests like that should NOT be using Airbnb. They should use a hotel, as you mentioned. I call those type of people "hotel people." They do not embody the Airbnb community spirit.

I've had a couple guests like this, and no matter what you do, they're not happy. And when they're that nasty, even if you give them a discount or any refund, they still tend to leave a bad review. I have finally begun to leave honest reviews for people like this. Nobody wants to host people like this and if all of us hosts can let the public know, future prospective hosts are forewarned. 

Your place is so beautiful that my chin dropped open when I saw the exterior photo. I'd love to stay there one day if I can get there! I've saved it to my wish list. Best of luck, and you're doing a fantastic job.