Recovering after abusive guests

[Dáithí0]

Hi people

Has anybody ever had any issues with abusive clients that they are finding hard to forget?  I have always had great guests but the following happened recently.

It started with me getting a phone call from somebody claiming to be friends of the guests coming to my apartment. I was very nice and welcoming on the phone but I quickly noticed a sort of air to the conversation from the caller that they believed my apartment may not be in a "nice enough" for them and they wanted to know exactly where it is. I said it was too difficult to explain by phone and they if they would please be kind enough to check the directions from the airbnb ad it would explain all the details of it, and that I also had to go back to work, really I wanted to get off the phone as quick as I could as I was not liking the conversation and questions about how good my apartment was.

Anyhow I messaged the clients on airbnb saying their friend called but it would be nicer to keep it on Airbnb rather than by phone. I got a message back saying they weren't sure who it was exactly who called me but must have been a relation of theirs. I was a bit annoyed that they gave out my phone number randomly but I didn't say anything at risk of bad feedback so wished them well and a welcome for their upcoming booking and how to access my key safe to let themselves in. I heard no more from then on.

I messaged when they had checked in asking how they were getting on etc but no reply - on their check out day I did the same but they again ignored all my messages. After they had left I send a final message saying I hoped they had a lovely trip etc and would they mind giving me feedback and that I had left them nice feedback in the meantime.

This time I got a reply... it was awful... they came back with a load of made up reasons to complain. Everything they could think of wasn't good enough, they even didn't like the colour of my skirting boards. But the most upsetting part of this was when they went through my wardrobes and removed my clothes and photographed them sending the pictures to me. They also called my clothes and personal belongings rubbish. It was very intrusive and upsetting. They then said they would hold off on feedback for now but that they believed that I should pay them over 200 Euro. In other words pay them 200 or face bad feedback. 

In horror I contacted Airbnb who thankfully intervened explaining to me that it was a clear display of extortion and not to worry about it.

However since I feel as though I was violated and I am finding it hard to forget. My home is probably the most personal thing I have, I always enjoyed sharing it on Airbnb but seeing my clothes photographed, my things referred to as rubbish and my house disrespected so horribly has had a lasting effect on me. I realise these were people who clearly had an agenda from the start and were on a mission to get a free holiday in Dublin - but that doesn't really help. I still feel very upset from it. I have created a solution to lock my personal belongings away now and hopefully I wont have guests like that again.

But has anybody else experienced this? And if so how have you managed to recover from constantly thinking about it? I realise my apartment is lovely and all my feedback is 5 star and I give the best possible service I can, but I am constantly cleaning and recleaning and have a sad feeling about it all. 

Thanks guys

Dave

[Todd-and-Reese0]

Wow. This is horrifying. So sorry that happened to you. We have a different situation where we are here all the time so they cannot do things like that, but we have discussed if we ever rented out the whole house that we would put our personal things in a locked closet and put locks on any doors/areas that we didn't want them to go into. We've already installed a lock on our liquor cabinet due to guest behavior and on the door to our private balcony (off a bedroom they aren't allowed in) but now we are going to put them on our offices because guests sometimes think it's okay to give themselves a tour of our home when we aren't here. We also installed interior cameras in the main areas that point to exterior doors and cameras. It seems that every time we let our guard down, something happens. So, we keep adding safety measures. You may want to consider.

[Dáithí0]

Cameras are a good idea, I guess most guests are great but when they are bad they are really bad it seems.

[Helen3]

Hello @Dáithí0

This is one of the strangest stories I have come across.

I am so sorry you had such horrible and strange guests.

My first guest was a truly horrible man who made up lies about my home, so I sympathise. Thankfully as you will see I have had lovely guests since.

If you are going to leave clothes in a place you let out I recommend you leave them along with any personal and expensive items in locked wardrobes so guests can't look through them. 

I would also suggest not taking calls from people who claim to be friends of guests. They should never have given out your number.

I suggest perhaps a nice massage or spa day with friends, a partner or relatives or other treat to take your mind off these horrible people. You will soon have lovely guests to replace these horrible memories.

[Dáithí0]

Thanks for the tips, yep it was a very strange experience. I definitely learned never engage in any contact outside of Airbnb other than urgent directions or something like that. Really it would be best if Airbnb didn't make your number available directly. But yep will be locking everything away now. 

[David126]

Must admit I would not use ABB for a whole house rental, I have a few weird incidents, nature of the business, now my property is pretty obvious but my first thought would be if they have your number they have your address and if they are not your Guests then what are they doing calling you?

[Dáithí0]

Definitely, it is more something I will suggest to airbnb to not share your phone number as they should only contact you in writing via the app and that way there is a complete record to protect you. 

[Bruce43]

@Dáithí0 wow bad news mate.i guess you don't live on or near the premises.(listing)

I am sure bells went off in your head when this transpired 

It started with me getting a phone call from somebody claiming to be friends of the guests coming to my apartment. I was very nice and welcoming on the phone, but I quickly noticed a sort of air to the conversation from the caller that they believed my apartment might not be in a "nice enough" for them and they wanted to know exactly where it is.

that is the guest from hell knocking on your door.

Take a break if you can and take a vacation is my advice.

Or a whiskey and a break from an instant booking to guests you can vet

your house looks amazing.

Pick your guests! Through messages and profiles.

Communication, before booking is a must don't trust the so called invisible filters, Airbnb tells you it has. 

[Dáithí0]

I rely on Airbnb for college so I don't have too much choice in who I take so I rely on airbnb for their filters, but in fairness they were really great in helping me. It is amazing however how much a bad client can effect you, I work very hard to give them a great experience so it really got to me as they tried to rip me off and hold me to randsom. Thanks for the comments on the apartment buddy 🙂

[Lyndsey2]

In my experience, the best thing to erase the memory of bad guests is new, great guests! Also, when a guest makes me feel violated or imposed on, I try to redirect the energy by doing something particularly nice for the next guests. A bottle of wine, a pass to our local museum, or even just an extra thorough scrubbing of the space. Somehow turning the energy around into something positive helps me to shake off the bad vibes. 

I am trying very hard to do that right now, as I had one guest just show up and let themselves into the space an hour before their specified arrival time, followed by another who gave very low ratings because of quirks of the listing very clearly outlined in the listing and again in the photos. Hmpf. Not a very good week at all over here either.

[Dáithí0]

Good tips. I've had some really lovely people to focus on. 

Just to note if you have quirks noted on the listing already then you can ask Airbnb to review that feedback as being against the rules. 

[Lyndsey2]

I called this morning to do just that. Fingers crossed for good luck! He also marked me down for cleanliness but in his comments under cleanliness said the bathroom is too small and he didn't like the style. ??? What does that have to do with cleanliness and of course the style and size are been obvious from the photos. Luckily, it's a listing I co-host for so I feel a little more removed, but also, I took photos of the room and bathroom to document how clean they were, so hopefully at least on that point, they can call his review false. 

[Dáithí0]

Definitely get Airbnb involved as they really couldn't have done more for me when I handed it over to them. Also I didn't even go back to the client, Airbnb did it for me so there was no more contact with them. It's amazing how people think - they style of the bathroom lol it makes for funny reading as your style is your style - it was in your ad so what's the problem. 🙂

[Zoe34]

@Dáithí0 I am so sorry you have had this experience - I just looked at your listing and it is absolutely gorgeous.  Don't let some mean guests ruin the way you feel about your most prized possession!

I too had a rude guest who reviewed my home in the worst way.  He put down the location of my house, the things inside my house, even the shape of my house!  It was a very odd review, but out of 25+ reviews, he's the only one who has been negative.  This happened in March and I still think of it sometimes, so I understand how you feel.  But please know that you have a beautiful home and remember that and keep on hosting! 🙂 

[Dáithí0]

Wow thanks so much for that lovely comment. It is a relief to know that somebody else has experienced what it is to rethink it when you just want to forget about it. As you said it's your most prized possession and so it's personal at and entirely different level. In a way it's like somebody telling you they don't like the shape of you haha