Worried about incoming guest

[Liz197]

I'm quite new as a host, today my 4th guest arriving.

He seemed considerate and friendly.

So ... he was originally arriving at 4pm, the check in time has been pushed back throughout the day, which is fine, i get it, plans change.

I was then asked if he could bring a guest just for tonight, i agreed.

He now isn't checking in until 10.45pm, I've reminded him 10pm was my latest check in time.

He has apologised, he seems nice but now i'm feeling a little bit concerned and stressed.

I'd appreciate any feedback, thoughts, comments on how to handle this

Thanks guys!

[Jessica-and-Henry0]

I hope all the communication you had with the guest was through Airbnb. If so, if I were in your shoes I'd think "enough is enough" and tell the guest you won't allow check-in after 10pm. My experience (not from Airbnb but rather other life experiences ) is that most people who know what to do to take advantage of the kindness of others always "seem nice enough" at first. They only become nasty when people refuse to accomodate their "special" requests. I'm also a new host, and my advice is, remind him of the house rules, be firm and stick to your rules. If you don't stick to them, no one else will. 

Actually, to be honest I probably would have been more firm about not allowing the extra guest (I have a very strict rule allowing only registered guests entry), but I might have been open to a late check-in IF the guest had a good reason (like flight delay or car trouble). 

I would send a message along the lines of "I've already been quite understanding and considerate about allowing a last minute unregistered guest to stay just for tonight. I have been waiting for you to arrive and check-in since 4pm. It is now XXpm and you have postponed your arrival time X times. This is NOT acceptable behavior as an Airbnb guest. My home is NOT a hotel. Please do what you need to do to check-in by 10pm as stated in my listing or else I will have no choice but to contact Airbnb. I hope to see you no later than 10pm." 

[Robin4]

@Liz197 @Jessica-and-Henry0

I have said it before so often Liz, people who want to haggle over house rules or other details very rarely make good guests.

Just the manner of their approach, their nondescript way of orchestrating these little variations, as though it is no big deal signifies that they have had a lifetime of getting their own way....they have perfected their craft. When this guest tried to request variations you should have at that point stated....."Our agreement was for xxxx and If I deviate from that it effects all sorts of other arangements so I reluctantly have to say no, sorry but it's got to be this way!"
Throughout my life I had to rely heavily on human nature in business to the point where I have seen this thousands of times and I can almost group them into categories Liz.

The most strident and dificult type are those that were 'only children'! They never had competition growing up and are used to getting their own way. They will very rarely accept something on face value and always put a condition on it that is more to their expectation or liking.

The next most difficult group are those who are the result of a failed parental relationship, a divorce, a custody issue. They feel dudded, as though life has been cruel to them and they need to extract the best out of every situation as a form of compensation.

Curiously those who have lost a parent through death when they were young turn out to be excellent people to deal with. They take on a helping role early because they have had to, and they become very adaptable and accepting of situations.

Liz, you can tell a lot by the way a guest approaches you....If they compliment you or your listing and simply want to stay, they will make good guests! If they want to ask a heap of questions about various things they could have read in your listing description, what they are doing is trying to solicit an alteration that will shift the balance of power from your favour to theirs.....and it is probable that they will be difficult. They don't do it consciously, it's just something they have always done, it's a form of entitlement.

I have recently been put to the test when I did let my guard down and offered a discount for a stay on request. I have had reason to regret that decision.....and it won't happen again!

I know most of this Liz is not information you were asking for, but I can asssure you it is valuable to put in your memory banks for the future!

Cheers.....Rob

[Andrea9]

And @Liz197, when somebody asks about bringing another guest it's also important to tell them that while that's possible the reservation must be changed before to reflect the new situation to be covered accordingly by Airbnb (and if you want add on for insurance reasons) and if extra-person charge applicable, then of course adapt the rate. Don't wait for guest to do it, because they will probably use any excuse to avoid it. Always send changes proactively from your side right away.

Seems like guests pushing for later and later check ins are trying to enter past host bedtime and without being seen. Since you kept pushing he had to admit to the second person. Was it a same day booking?  The combo of same day, really late entry, plus probably hoping to sneak in a 2nd - you do the math.