How to handle those difficult reviews!

Robin4
Level 10
Mount Barker, Australia

How to handle those difficult reviews!

I have posted this comment on another thread but have felt that, due to problems experienced by new hosts when it comes to how they should handle the review of difficult guests I would open a new thread.

This is a long post but a lot of time and thought has gone into it....We all learn every day, and as you continue to host you will become very proficient at sorting out 'the wheat from the chaff' but if you take note of these points I am sure this post will stand you in good stead!

 

Reviews cannot be taken frivilously because they are the centrepiece of the ABB platform. But on the other hand we are reminded at every opportunity that anything less than that 5 stars is not good enough...and for that reason we 'pussyfoot' around issues for fear what we say may come back to bite us in the bum!

And if we start rating our guests as per our experience.......ABB will find a way to remove it!

 

From seeing thousands of these posts I think I have come up with a protocol for reviewing.

There will be some hosts and guests that will fall outside of the common boundaries of accepted behaviour! There are times when police will need to be involved and even more times when help from Airbnb is required and these incidents will require immediate action, but this will only ever be the case for a handfull of bookings over your hosting experience, particularly as you become more experienced in spotting problem guests before accepting! So what I am saying will not be relevant to those situations. What I am talking about are those hostings where rules were broken, personality clashes existed, and there may have been a different perspective between host and guest. If you are concerned about what to write, try the following! And if the reviews do differ wildly keep these points in mind for your review response:

 

1/. Never write a review until you have had two nights sleep after the departure of the guest! There are many little things that will annoy you enough to make a comment when they are a fresh experience, but which, with time, will mellow and can be appraised in a more objective way.

2/. Always write a review as though you have been asked to do it for someone else. 'YOU' will see things as being 'bleedin obvious' because it's your 'turf'! Another set of eyes will see a legitimate reason why the guest did (or felt) what they did!

3/. As I have said before, make yourself a nice drink, leave your emotion out in the garage, or out in the barn before you sit down at that keyboard. What you write at this point will stay with you long after you have forgotten about that belligerent 'turkey'! It will stay with you as long as you host and....it cannot be removed! We have all said things we wish we could take back! When it's in a review it is 'set in stone'....there is no going back!

4/. Tell the community what you feel about this guest, but don't give the guest a reason to resent you. As I said in a comment in another thread, you can make them feel guilty by carefully selecting your words but still finish by wishing them well in future. This way the balance of nature is restored....you made your point, but you have also said 'no hard feelings'!

 

And if their review is a stinker:

5/. Never get into a 'he said/she said' slogging match with a guest. You will always loose, and you will make yourself look petty and a difficult person, in yourself, to deal with. Remain aloof and always assure the guest you value their contribution because after all, the only way you can become a better host is to take notice of what others say. Don't apologise, but tell the guest some things are beyond your control.....like, how much cloud cover may have been present on the day! But tell them that their comments will be taken on board and acted on.

 

Many guests will form an opinion of you by how you carry yourself in the review process....you can be seen as a diplomatic person with great hosting skills........or you can be seen as a 'tough nut to crack' !

Sorry this is so drawn out but, it is a major issue on the forum ....I am not saying I am the review sage but I have had a lifetime dealing with people....I took a mechanical services company from 3 employees to 27 in 6 years......and I don't think my people skills are all that bad!

Cheers.....Rob

238 Replies 238
Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

Hi @Marc46, I'm not 100% sure how it works. I thought if a resolution dispute had been opened, neither party would be allowed to leave a review, but perhaps that is not the case if the dispute has already been closed.

 

It would be great to hear from someone who knows about it. I would be very interested. I couldn't find the answer when I searched the Help Centre.

@Marc46 you should cancel the reservation and terminate her stay (with help of ABB, not by yourself) because she violated your house rules by bringing extra people . She wouldn't be able to leave a review because of cancellation. She would not be refunded.

You made her a favor and in return you got punished with bad review. 

Take a look at my house rules about registration and visitors

ps

you can cancel and terminate their stay at any moment when you find out that there is more people inside , it doesn't have to be at the arrival.

 

Any host or landloard have to learn how to say NO and defend his property and house rules. Big mama / policeman / doberman combination  🙂

@Branka-and-Silvia0 You wrote "you can cancel and terminate their stay at any moment when you find out that there is more people inside , it doesn't have to be at the arrival."

THANKS, good advice, I learned something from you. 

Jean110
Level 2
Las Vegas, NV

I wish I would have read this earlier.  I have been hosting since October2016 .  Have a great experiences until my last guest.  A very young girl and her boyfriend.

 I could tell she was drunk when they arrived.  No big deal, their first trip as adults, in Las Vegas.   They went out after about an hour, were gone till 4am.  At which time, hell broke lose.  She was screaming and crying.  From what I could hear, they were physically fighting.  This went on for about15 minutes, then my husband, who works graveyard, got home.  I was a little itimidated to go in there alone.  The male guest was about 20, Atleast 6'3 and about 250lbs.    My husband knocked on their door twice,  then entered.  They were both red faced and the room was a wreck.  She was bleeding from her leg.

 

 They convinced my husband that she had fallen out front and thats why she was crying.  Thats Bu**sh**.  I wanted them out that minute.  He talked me down and said, their young, our daughters ages.  Give them another chance.  I did.  They were here for 3 more days. They couldnt stop telling me how sorry and embarrassed they were for the first nights events. They were a little loud and very messy after that but nothing I couldnt handle.  So by the time they left, I was calmed down.  I did not put anything about the first night in their review.  Maybe she had fallen.... maybe my instincts were wrong.  Then I got my review.   They  gave me 3 and 4 stars in every catagory.  Not one 5 star.  My 12 reviews before that had been all 5 stars.  I am still, so mad.  But. what can I do, freak out on two stupid, immature kids, who im never gonna see again.  No, but I will tell the entire truth from now on in my reviews.

 

Thanks for letting me vent,  TJ

TJ, after 3 yrs of hosting with ABB, I gave my first negatve review last week, a group of 6 young men, they were well behaved but left our place a complete mess, that has never happened to us. The young man never returned a message on my review, so I guess he realized that they were bad. All I can say is to just be honest.

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

@Robin4 I've had a good run recently with some really delightful guests. However, there were a couple back to back who seemed to disregard some quite important house rules (I ask all guests to confirm they've read and agreed to the rules before booking) and I'm finding it tricky to write reviews for them.

 

The first one smoked (a lot) in the bedroom, which is strictly against house rules. Although he left the windows wide open when he checked out, the smell was really strong and took a couple of days and a lot of cleaning to get rid of. Luckily I didn't have guests arriving the same day! He also continuously left lights on - once for an entire day and evening - and taps running. However, he was a nice enough person so I didn't want to leave a negative review. So, I just chalked it up to experience but commented on these things in private feedback. I'm glad I did as he rated me five stars on everything.

 

But, then the next set of guests (a couple) were worse. I found them a bit difficult to communicate with, particularly the guy who barely said a word. It wasn't a language barrier, because their first language was English. Unfortunately, I was away on a work trip for a couple of days during their stay. When I got back, my other guest informed me that the guy had been smoking marijuana. He smoked outside, on the request of the other guest, but that's still strictly prohibited quite clearly in my house rules. I also found out they had friends over without my consent. Again, breaking the rules.

 

At a bit of a loss what to write here. I don't want to be overly negative, but I have a weird feeling about these guests and that they are going to either leave me a less than positive review or low ratings, but I could be wrong.

 

Would something like this be appropriate:

 

"X and Y were polite and very self-sufficient guests. They were out and about most of the time and I was also away for part of their stay so I didn’t spend a lot of time with them, but they were tidy and cleaned up after themselves. It was unfortunate that a couple of quite important house rules were broken though."

 

And to keep the specific comments on the drugs/visitors to private feedback?

I think your correct on what your response is.

We recently had a lady inher 40`s and her mother in her 70`s, they showed up at our house, the young lady gives me this strange look. I take them into the house and showed them the downstairs common area, the lady`s mom was thrilled and happy. I then showed them the second floor where they had 3 rooms plus a private bath all to themselves. About 10 min. later they come down and she tells me that she is a very lite sleeper and that the cars in the street were not going to let her sleep. Then she changes her story and tells me that the photos on my listing, which were taken by an ABB photograper, she tells me they used a wide angle lens. She then tells me that they were leaving, I told her she should cntact ABB and that I thought she should at least  pay me one night since she had booked 3 nights, she very sarcasticly told me she was not paying one cent. They  left and about 15 min. later an ABB represntative called me and asked if I was willing to refund all or any of her money, I told him that I had offered her to pay 1 night and she blew me off. I refued to refund any money period. Two weeks later I recieved an e-mail from ABB asking me again if I was willing to settle for one night payment and I still refused, it has been about 2 months and no more calls or e-mails from ABB, I argument was my host status as a super host and all our reviews and that the lady had other issues. I really want to thank ABB for sticking by me.

 

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

@Jack70, glad to hear you had a good resolution from Airbnb on this one. I'm not sure what the real issue was with these guests, but their behaviour seems pretty strange to me!

Robin4
Level 10
Mount Barker, Australia

@Huma0

Hey, you're back!.....I was worried you had left us here for greener pastures now the hint of summer is coming 🙂

Good to hear your hosting is going OK....and I can report that I have managed to keep the Crocodiles well fed, ander control and haven't lost a guest to them since our last talk!

Ok, lets recap on this review. Yes agree with @Jack70, he is right, and you are on the right track. 

 

Back tracking a bit 90% of reviews you know, or have a really good idea of what you are going to get. The guest will have been wonderful, or an absolute turkey, so for those reviews you either give them a glowing review, or tell the world in a subtle brief way you wish them well but wouldn't want to see them again....great, all cut and dried!

There are the odd times where someone (and I hesitatingly have to say, mainly women travelling on their own) will tell you how wonderful you were as a host and how marvelous it was to say in this excellent place, you leave them a brilliant review and when theirs comes you get a low star rating and they have a catalogue of grizzles! You are going to get caught out with them and there is just nothing you can do about that Huma....except possibly (oh, and this is going to get me into trouble) keep reviews about single traveling women brief and generic!! 

 

But, in a situation where the hosting was ok but rules were broken but both of you parted amicably, just keep the review itself very short and generic...."X an Y left my house in good condition, my interaction with them was minimal and I hope they enjoyed their stay".

That's all you need to say, you don't want to build them up, and you don't want to crucify them at that stage. When their review comes, if it's a good one you can thank them for their kind review, say how hosting does introduce challenges for both hosts and guests but we all learn from every experience just I and as X and Y did. A little more observance of my house rules and respect for other guests would have been great but I feel sure time and experience will make X and Y good guests to host.

You have told the world that there were problems (which we will take on board) but you have been gracious about it.

 

If their review is a poor one you can say that you are sorry that their stay was not up to their expectations, and possibly their feelings are in a way similar to yours!..Make a token comment like, "I understand some pleasures in life do come at a cost but, it would have been nice if X and Y had considered those guests who come after them where my smoking policy is concerned. After all it is a reflection, not just on me, but to future guests and that is a little unfair. I wish X and Y all the best for the future but if another booking request came from them I would have to respectfully decline it!

 

So Huma, you are not going to have egg on your face where your review itself is concerned. So often we see a host gives a glowing review and the guest gives a stinker and then the host backtracks with a mass of compliants which screams...."You were only great before you gave your review"! Don't get into that situation Huma, it is not a good look!

Listen possum, you know how to handle yourself, you are a smart girl, and the fact that you take the time to think these things out instead of simply lashing out with your first thoughts, to me, makes you a great host.

Cheers.....Rob

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

Thanks @Jack70 and @Robin4 for the advice.

 

@Robin4 glad to hear the crocodiles haven't nibbled any of your guests and no, unfortunately no greener pastures, just some big deadlines at work, which are thankfully done and dusted.

 

So, I bit the bullet and wrote the review. As I expected, the guests didn't leave a glowing review, although it wasn't terrible either, but one four star review really knocks my stats and it take a lot of five star ones to bounce back, so that will be my superhost status gone at the next assessment! Oh well...

 

Here's what they wrote:

 

"All in all the stay at Huma's was 4 stars. The only concerns were that the bedroom is actually on the 4th floor and the wifi was not strong mainly in the bedroom. Unfortunately the fridge was having problems when we stayed there, it wasn't cold enough to store any food or water. Location was great for catching the tube.

Accuracy feedback:
Your guest mentioned some issues that weren’t accurately reflected in your listing description: wifi, listing description. Additional comments: “The bedroom was not located on the third floor, it was actually the fourth floor. Maybe in the U.K. the ground floor doesn't count but in the states it does. The wifi was in and out in the bedroom which was disappointing.”
So, not so terrible, but kind of annoying. Debating what to respond, if I respond at all, as I don't think the above comments are totally fair.
Firstly, in the UK, it is the 3rd floor! Am I suposed to change my listing to use American terminology when I'm in London and I have more British guests than American? The listing says early on "Please note that this room is at the top of the house, i.e. on the third floor, so there are quite a few stairs!" and then a little bit further down, "This particular room is at the top of the house (3rd) floor, so may not be suitable for guests who have difficulties with stairs." Bear in mind these were able bodied people in their early 20s. However, they brought a ludicrous amount of luggage for a short stay, which I did repeatedly offer to help them with.
Re the WiFi, we have not had any problems with it in this room for months (I do make a point of checking with guests) since I had an extra router put in. However, I still told them to let me know if they had problems with it just in case I needed to reboot the router. They never mentioned it. They generally avoided me during their stay, so I messaged to ask if everything was okay or if they needed anything. No response. My other guest tried to talk to them to no avail. They planned to leave without saying goodbye even though I was in the next room!
Yes, the fridge was broken. However, we have two frigdes, and I told them they could put stuff in the one that was working totally okay. The response was that, as they didn't cook at home, they weren't planning to here, therefore they didn't need a fridge.
Anyway, I'm not surprised that they chose to pick holes. I had a feeling. They were very weird from the outset. I had to delay my work trip by a whole day because they wouldn't be slightly flexible about check in, saying that the Eurostar journey from Paris to London would be 'overwhelming'!! They ended up arriving at the time I had requested anyway, so there was no need to change my flights after all...
Sorry, rant over. Just needed to let off some steam. Then... figure out if/how I should respond.
 
Robin4
Level 10
Mount Barker, Australia

@Huma0

Hey, said in another post on Community Help, just wish we didn't have this barrier of distance between us that prevents us from giving you, Gerry and Rashid and all those other lovely London hosts a big hug and tell you we are all with you, hand in hand. 

 

On a lighter note I feel the need to cheer you up a bit. All this talk of Crocodiles down in the lake has lead to a certain wander lust on their part and a couple of them are coming up into the rear garden and quite close to the cottage of late!

This one I can easily identify because she has lost a toe/claw as a result of some friendly family altercation, and I call her Maggie!

I call her this for two reasons....Rod Stewart (Maggie May) is so tiny this croc could swallow him in one bite! And secondly Margaret Thatcher had a big political bite but, despite their size, her teeth were no match for this female's!!!

 

IMG20170323183955.jpg

 

IMG20170323184029.jpg

 

 

Cheers.....Rob

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

@Robin4, yes Maggie is a fine specimen indeed! Thank you for your hugs and good wishes. x

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

But @Robin4, maybe you need to add an orangutan to your menagerie?FullSizeRender.jpgThis isn't my place by the way, but a rather fun hotel I stayed at in Maastricht.