@Maureen447 Unfortunately, you began your hosting career at a time when hosts are reporting getting some of the worst guests they've ever had. It appears that since COVID, there are lots of new Airbnb guests (I suspect there is social media buzz about how hosts are now desperate for bookings and it's a great time to get a deal on an Airbnb), who tend not to bother to read thoroughly, or at all, through the listing description or house rules.
Your place is lovely- the setting is gorgeous, and I can see how much work you put into it. The kitchenette is sweet, those people were just being jerks.
A few suggestions- If you are using Instant Book, turn that off for now, so guests have to send a Booking Request. This gives you the opportunity to communicate with them before deciding whether to accept their booking or not, and check out their reviews, if they have any. A guest with a string of great reviews is probably nothing to be concerned about, but a newbie guest needs to be well vetted. You would want to make sure they have read all you've written in your ad, are aware and willing to comply with the house rules, have entered the correct number of guests, are aware you live on the property, that there isn't any Wifi, etc. Communicating with guests and reading their reviews is the best way for me to ensure I get good guests.
Raise your price! $40/night for a private suite for 2 people, in an awesome setting, with a kitchenette and all the amenities you provide, and a hot tub to boot, is way too cheap. You'll get a better quality of guest if you aim for people who aren't just looking for a cheap place .(I say this in spite of the fact that I hate it when I read "Low prices attract low-quality guests", because I have a budget-priced, for my area, private room/bath listing and I get consistently lovely guests, but your price seems really way too low for what you offer)
Although you have listed it as a private room, and mention way down at the bottom that you live in the separate part of the house, I think you should put the wording in the body of your listing info. "This is an owner-occupied home, although our portion of the house and the entrance is completely separate from the guest quarters. As we are on-site, we are available to assist you with whatever you might need during your stay".
And while all hosts may not agree with me on this, I think that when you are living there, you shouldn't have that wording about the guests being able to choose self-check-in. Any guest who is averse to meeting the host, who lives in the same building, is not a guest I would want to have. Meeting and greeting your guests can go a long way towards you getting a sense of who they are, and them understanding that they are staying in someone's well-loved home. It isn't necessary to be overly chatty, or stay long, when they arrive, but a quick greeting and orientation is a good idea, IMO.
What I actually do with my guests when they arrive is show them to their room (they also have a private entrance, although they share my kitchen), give them a quick run.through of the most important things for them to be aware of in there, like where all the light switches are, that it takes a few minutes for the hot water to work itself through the pipes to their bathroom, etc. Then I say I'll leave them to get settled and relax, and that I'll clue them in about the kitchen, door locks and other stuff whenever they're ready.
I don't like to overload guests with too much information when they first arrive- they are usually tired from travelling, a bit disoriented, and it's hard to pay attention to the workings and quirks of a strange place in that state.
And don't put up with guest nonsense, like expecting a refund because she didn't like "the energy" after spending the night, using up the amenities, and leaving a mess. She ha every right to leave if she wishes, but no way should you agree to a refund.
Hope this helps a bit and that other hosts have some suggestions, as well. Hang in there- it's a hard learning curve sometimes.
