Cleanliness 2 stars. So I ask the guest what the problem was... sit down for this one.

[Kevin1322]

got a  2 star rating for "cleanliness".

So I message the guest to ask what the problem was.

Them " wood floors were not shiny"

Me: They are not wood, they are porcelain tiles.

Guest "they should be shiny"

Me: They are R12 rated non-slip tiles.  Non slip tiles aren't shiny.  Flattered that you thought they were wood, but they don't shine up. We bleach them daily. That is the point. The clue is non-slip. For grip. So you don't slip on them. 

Guest "you should have warned us, we could have dropped our phones and broken them"

Me: My tiles?

Them: "no, our phones"

This is what we are dealing with in 2021.  

You have to laugh or else you cry  🤣

The Endless Mirth of hosting.

[Colleen253]

@Kevin1322 This reminds me of the time I got down rated on cleanliness because the house smelled 'smoky' and one of the guests in the party had an asthma attack. I do feel badly about that poor guest, but guess what amenity was featured in the TITLE of my listing at the time? "Fireplace". What was featured prominently in description and photos throughout? You guessed it, "WOOD BURNING FIREPLACE." The house smelled a bit smoky due to the dozen or so previous guests who for the life of them just could not read or follow my brief and clear instructions on how to work the **bleep** thing. The fireplace is permanently off limits now. People are interesting.

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

😄 😄 😄 😄 😄 😄 😄 

O

MY

GOD

!

[Elaine701]

Yep, they're out there. 

Sometimes wayyy out there 🙃

[Kevin1322]

and they walk among us 😬

[Gichele0]

🤣🤣🤣.. I had a guest cancel the reservation, they complained there were bottles “everywhere” confused I asked for the “proof” they show me the shampoo and conditioner underneath the bathroom sink I leave in case guests need it. Airbnb still canceled despite the fact my listing said I provide these things. This host life ain’t easy 😂

[Suzanne302]

@Kevin1322 

Guest "you should have warned us, we could have dropped our phones and broken them"

Me: My tiles?

Them: "no, our phones"

I. Can't. Even. 😦

[Kevin1322]

These are the people they put "do not drink" warnings on bleach for.  🤣

[Ian611]

Better they dropped their phones than risk slipping and breaking their necks.lol

[Kevin1322]

I'd go for the neck option,  if given a choice😎

[Ann72]

@Kevin1322  I recently got a 4 overall.  Why?  The house was hot.  Why?  Guest didn't want to open the screened windows.  Why?  Because the insects outside buzzed.

In the summer.  In a house in the Maine woods.

[Kevin1322]

🤣

[Kevin1322]

we had two moaning about the sound of the sea. They could have closed the triple glazed window, but obviously getting out of bed was too much bother.  Clue is in the listing title: "Handy for the Coast Path"

Obviously too handy for the coast for some 🤣

There is some sort of idiocy epidemic going on under the smokescreen of covid, I'm sure.

[Kevin1322]

the ones I can't fathom are those who give you five stars for everything asked but 4 overall. That seems to be a real issue with new airbnb users. particularly brits who seem to be saving five stars for the perfect experience that they will never have because they are still saving five stars for the next one, just in case.

[John1902]

@Kevin1322 Kevin I have had exactly that same problem. And it is so demoralising when it’s a lack of understanding. To the point that I put in a page in my guest info explaining the review system as I couldn’t find it anywhere else.   My point is that with airbnb reviews if all was fine , in line with the listing and I didn’t mislead them anywhere that’s a five star review and that there are no degrees of brilliance just degrees of shame. I also explain it in the context of the overall requirements for remaining a super host or for even just keeping your listing and that all of these thresholds are above 4.   Finally it’s maths but seems unfair that one 4 star

Review impacts on your average but it takes 15 or so 5* reviews to recover the position.  Since I’ve done that I’ve had only good reviews and 17 5* ratings on the trot which raised my average from a tortuous 4.88 to a terrific 4.89.  

I do make a point of saying that im not forcing them into a 5* review and they must give me the review I deserve. This just gives them parameters to make that decision.   

john