Difficult Guest

[Janelle21]

I have a guest for 9 days who I feel I'm having to teach/have some ettiquette. He had only positive reviews so this has been very frustrating.

Left damp towel post-shower on leather sofa,

Took up 2 parking spaces,

Opens & closes doors so loud it can be heard through whole house (seriously, just turn the handle man)

Places dirty(raw chicken tray from the grocery store) in with clean dishes in sink.

Never, ever leaves.

I hate how I've been feeling so nitpicky and asking him to please do this/please don't do this, and it's wearing me down. These aren't in my welcome guide/ instructions because they've never needed to be. We have 6 more days together  and I'm just so tired...

Any suggestions?

[Sarah977]

@Janelle21  You have a guest who is basically like a teenager (maybe he is only 18 or 19?) and doesn't understand that wet towels can't be left on a leather couch or that the unwashed chicken tray isn't okay to put with clean dishes. There really isn't much you can do about that except clean up after him, because, as you say, you'll just be nitpicking all day. His mommy probably cleaned up after him.

Slamming the doors is different- that is disrespectful to others and you should ask him to be respectful of the fact that he chose to book a home share and not create that kind of noise that disturbs others. Also that he can damage your door by doing that and if that happens, you would need to charge him for repairs.

I'm also a home share host, and about all you can do in this situation is change your own attitude so you aren't so bothered by his inattention. Pretend some young nephew or cousin came to stay with you and behaved cluelessly like that and just resign yourself to having to pick up his wet towels, etc, because no one ever taught him any different and you won't be able to teach him that in a week.

You don't indicate what sort of person he is, if he is easy to converse with. In some cases you just need to be real. "Dude, (as she pulls at her hair) you are driving me bonkers- did your mom just clean up after you all the time? I really hate to have to nitpick at you, but could you please try to be a little more conscious of the fact that you're sharing my home with me and not living alone?"

Make sure to leave an honest review. One thing I'd say in the review is that he isn't suited to home-sharing.

Either put up with his unconscious ways, and try not to let it upset you, or tell him he has to find another place and leave.

I had a guest who was a totally lax dishwasher. She cooked a lot, and always cleaned up the kitchen after her meal prep and washed her dishes, but there was always bits of food and grease all over her "clean" dishes. Unlike your guest, she was a totally delightful person and a good guest in every other way, so I chose not to mention it (although I'm sure she wouldn't have been offended and would have paid more attention if I had), I just rewashed her dishes when she wasn't around.

[Ralf5]

@Janelle21 ,

may be you should put a big sign over the sink and in the bath room

"remember - your mom doesn't live here ..."

[Sarah977]

@Ralf5  I did once put up a sign like that in a place where I was picking fruit and there was a shared kitchen for all the pickers, big enough for a family of 4, that 40 people were expected to share (don't get me started on the people who were running this place).

The camp was largely populated with 18-20 year old kids. Because I couldn't stand the filth and mess any more, I spent an hour one day scrubbing and bleaching everything down, throwing out the half-eaten food in take-out containers piled on the table, etc. 

There were 2 young women sitting on the couch in the kitchen yakking with each other the whole time I was doing this. Not only didn't they pitch in to help, as soon as I was done, they got up, made themselves some ramen noodles, left the packaging and bits of dried noodles all over the counter and their dirty cooking pot and dishes in the sink. I really felt like slapping them.

That's when I wrote that note, in big letters, on the blackboard that was on the wall.

[Dale711]

Hi @Janelle21 

**

Write a note, let the guest figure it out!

**

Happy Home Sharing ✌️

**[Comment removed in line with the Airbnb Nondiscrimination Policy]

[Sarah977]

@Dale711  That's a really sexist comment. And female home share hosts are not at all interested in affection and attention from their male guests. They just need the guest to be respectful.

[Dale711]

Hi @Janelle21 

Please accept my apologies 🙏

I used a wrong words, and should be more precise.

You may consider to sending the guest message,

‘Please Attention on the daily basis manner in the shared space. 

e.g. don't left the towels on the sofa, parks the car in the correct space, gently close the door 

Respectfully others housemate and create a  happy environment in the shared living ‘

@Sarah977

My bad 🙏 Thank you for your feedback and the corrections.