Guest has mail delivered to my residence with out my consent!

[Teresa858]

Guest booked 8 nights; Sept 5 until Sept 13

On Sept 5, I checked the mailbox grabbed my mail and made my way back to the front door of my house. As I approach the door entrance I climbed the steps to the patio I noticed to the right by my bicycle a box! I assumed it was a package from Tonique company for facial soap I was elated to receive.  As I reached for the box and glared at the name I noticed it was not my name and I had to think for a minute... Its the name of the guy who is to come later this evening!! I immediately became livid. The nerve this man had to have his mail shipped to my house and did not have the sense, respect to converse with me about it. I was appalled, I felt disrespected and all types of thoughts flooded my mind. He may be a  potential "squatter," he now can calm residency, what if the item in the box is hazardous and so fourth!!

Sept.6-7

The next few days this guy just gave off bad vibes, glared at me in silence as if I did something to him. He would not look a me directly nor my husband when speaking. So I felt awkward being in his presence. He seemed suspicious, his mannerisms were just all too much for me! To the point I had my husband to move forward weeks early and build the wall in the hallway closing off the two guest rooms that have outdoor entrances, in which one of the rooms this guy stays in. Just so I could feel conformable in my home as it is my son and I at home throughout the day.

So, dealing with this impression given the first encounter and then this is why the topic is an issue!

Today is Sept 9 this guest text me:

" I ordered something, I need for work and had it shipped to your address, it should be here this week." He text this as if its the first item, he's unaware I knew  already as the package was on my patio that he helped hi, self to when he arrived and before he knocked on the side house door!

My response was as follows; " Please, get a post office box for your personal mail for next items. As I never gave permission for ANY guest to use my address to have mail shipped to! Also, you booked 8 days, your checkout is on the 13th this Friday by 12 noon as stated on Airbnb.I know you requested a longer visit (through my husband, not me) but unfortunately  for you someone has booked from the 13th till 30th of Sept. So, if your mail is delivered after your visit ends it'll be at the local post office!"

Has anyone encountered a problem like this with a guest?

[ONERüF0]

Seems you are making more out of this than need be.  Have guests deliver packages to homes frequently...what is the concern?  

[Linda108]

While I understand your concern should there be some dark reason that a guest would use your address without talking to you first, I am concerned that your message was a bit over the top and you have ensured a bad review.  I would never appreciate ANYONE communicating with me in that way if I inadvertantly made a mistake or crossed a line.

[Teresa858]

Greetings,

You shared your opinion now thanks! Some people are passive and having a guest stay 8 days with mail being delivered to your residence isnt an issue but for me it is!! I would appreciate a 'head up,' then maybe my  taking in of this would be different, I'm certain! Also, how I communicated with the guest was not disrespectful, at all. Thoroughly read!

I appreciate your feedback!

[Suzanne302]

@Teresa858  I, too, would be livid that someone had mail sent to my address without asking permission first. However, I agree with @Linda108  that perhaps your response could have been a bit more professional. Something like:

"Unfortunately we cannot accept mail for guests at this address. If you need something delivered the post office is located at XYZ. Since it isn't possible to extend your stay, this will also ensure you have access to your package if it happens to arrive after you check-out."

Simple and professional, yet clearly conveys mail is not to be delivered to your address.

[Teresa858]

Yes, ma'am understood! Yet there is no set way to respond and I do not see how I was "rude" Defiantly was not intended. 

Thank you for the feedback!

[Michelle1588]

You were absolutely correct in your stance. The nerve of a guest using your address to mail a package to himself without your permission. There are so many legal implications that can arrive out of a simple mailed package in the name of a visitor in NYC. So I'm with you on this one! I had a long term guest try that very same thing. I was pissed that he had the nerve to do that and not ask... That alone warrants suspicion. Good job. You have to be firm because some people are creepy and have ulterior motives. Common decency should tell a person not to use someone's address for mailing without asking. And common sense should help the understand when you say, NO. 

[Teresa858]

Hi, 

You think so?.. I am new to hosting and I've read similar issues with worse endings is why this matter is such a big concern to me and on top of it the guy seems weird and I am ready for him to exit my residence!

Thanks for the response!

[Sarah977]

@Teresa858  As a host, you should certainly not allow things that you don't feel comfortable with. But as others have said, do try to keep your communication with guests unemotional, and professional. It's hard when you don't like a guest anyway, I know, but you're going to run into all kinds of people when you host-some will be respectful and considerate and appreciative, some will be entitled complainers or act in ways that you feel are disrespectful. Some you'll love, maybe even become friends with, some you'll count the hours until they leave. You certainly shouldn't let bad behavior just continue, that's where a lot of hosts run into trouble, afraid to say anything, letting a guest walk all over them, or trying to please someone who obviously will never be pleased. It's always best to make it clear that this or that isn't okay, because if you let it continue, those kinds of guests will just take more liberties and be even more demanding.

But even if you're upset with a guest's behavior, it's important to find ways of saying things that are simply factual and firm.

I had a female guest who brought some guy home with her at 3AM-they were drunk and noisy and woke me up and kept me up for an hour. Now I could have gotten out of bed and gone and banged on her door and told him to leave right now (big ugly scene, right?), but I didn't. When I got up the next morning , they were already gone, but she had another 3 days left on her booking. I messaged her, saying that what she had done wasn't cool, that they woke me up and that she had booked for 1 person (and I only host one guest at a time, anyway). She messaged back saying sorry. That she'd like him to stay with her and she'd be willing to pay more. My response was that no, I only host one guest but if she wanted to invite him over during the day, and introduce him to me, and hang out a bit, that would be okay. She never did have him over, we never spoke about it again, and we got along fine for the rest of her stay.

A lot of things can go south or be okay, depending on how you handle it.

[Teresa858]

Hello,

I really appreciate your response. My favorite thus far! You're are absolutely correct, this is a learn able moment!

[Christine615]

Some people have autism or Aspergers. Not everyone is functional the way you want. I just had guests I was concerned about because of some "glitches" in communication, until my daughter told me she met them and they were quiet and polite.

I've gone to conferences where I had to ship things ahead of me. I always ask first to let people know. Especially if I can't have the package held. I learned the hard way when shipping boxes to a hotel that I would be charged $25 per box just for them to receive them. On top of the hundreds paid to ship them.

So don't assume they're being inconsiderate. Better to ask.

But if you're nervous about having different types of people in your home, maybe consider this isn't the right gig for you? I've learned to have a thick skin (took a while to build it up).

You could also post in your listing that your home is unavailable for guests needing packages delivered. Then it's case closed - a house rule.

[Susan1404]

@Teresa858- since it is so bothersome for you, you might consider putting something in your house rules that guests should check with you first before having anything shipped to your address.  I myself have had guests do this several times.  One guest asked beforehand and the others did not.  This was not too concerning to me and has not posed a problem since.  However, I will state that many people have things shipped to hotel rooms and I can see guests not understanding why there would be a difference when having things shipped to a residence they are booked at. 

[Teresa858]

Yes, I plan to update my house rules! Thanks for your feedback!

[Inna22]

@Teresa858I would have been livid as well. I would have been worried about establishing residency, being blamed for lost mail or having something illegal shipped to me; having it delivered after departure and a new guest inconvenienced by a mail person.

However your text to guest was really passive aggressive and unnecessarily so. We are in hospitality business. I always give a guest a benefit of a doubt on the first round. We all communicate in different ways and have different assumptions.  The guest has already shipped the box and is already leaving on the 13th. Your primary goal now (and in future similar situations) is to have him leave on good terms and not trash you in a review. You are not going to teach him a lesson with this text, only make him angry. Something like”I am glad you first package arrived safely. I will be on the look out for the second one. I kindly ask that you deliver all future packages to the local post office as I do not allow guest packages at my house. I understand you were not aware so no worries there. By there way, I now have another booking on the 13th and unfortunately would not be able to extend your stay however wish you amazing time for the rest of your trip to Augasta. Please do not hesitate to reach out if you need anything”.

Then go buy a pillow from target for $3.99, right his name on it and pound on it for a few minutes 🙂

[Teresa858]

Hi,

Thank you so much for commenting, I agree! I will definitely express myself differently. He wasn't aware I would just assume common scene you're a guest, you'd converse/inform host before hand, common courtesy. I am taking this all in and handle it a bit different next time, I need to update my rules as well.

Alright, I appreciate you have a good day!