Really?! I said no guests, even after the third time you asked...

[Alison437]

I’m a little bewildered and perplexed as to how this guests train of thought must be functioning. I send every guest when they book a list of my House rules, The third and one of the most important rules is no friends/family or local friends allowed.

That means nobody coming in for a quick bathroom break or hanging out in the foyer of my house while you retrieve something from your room. They are completely safe sitting in their car in my driveway while they wait for you. Here I am at home on a Friday night FaceTime in my best friend when my Airbnb guest returns to my house because he supposedly forgot his wallet.

Not only does he walk into my house but so does his so-called girlfriend. The girlfriend Who he has asked me three times now to be able to come over and watch TV when they return at night past midnight. I’ve told him every time that I do not allow guests not on the reservation and I do not want strangers walking around or being in my home. He came back at me with, “well maybe once you meet her you’ll feel better about it. I’ll bring her by so you can meet her.” NO! If this person is not on your reservation I don’t want them in my home, point blank simple. There is a very specific reason why I don’t want friends or guests here.

I live here with my eight-year-old son and this is my home, my castle. I am OK with sharing it with a guest who I meet when they check in. That’s it. So why does he now have the audacity to walk this woman into my home interrupt me while I’m on my personal phone call and basically force me to meet his girlfriend who I already told him I was not interested in a introduction! I’ve been a super host for two years now and this is the first time that I’ve had somebody press an issue that I have already denied. He is now overstepping boundaries and bringing a stranger inside the threshold of my home.

I personally feel that this is a major violation and I feel concerned that it’s only going to escalate and result with him bringing her inside and upstairs to our sleeping areas. I know it may seem petty to some people, but the guy could have called ahead and said hey I forgot something my girlfriend is with me would you like to meet her. But instead he just shows up and walk her into my house. I feel extremely uncomfortable with this and I want to know if anybody else has experienced something like this? I called Air Bnb last night after the third time he pressed the issue about her being allowed to sleep over without being on the reservation. Air Bnb said they would notate my account with my concerns but now I know it may seem petty to some people, but the guy could have called ahead and said hey I forgot something my girlfriend is with me would you like to meet her.

But instead he just shows up and walks her into my house. I feel extremely uncomfortable with this and I want to know if anybody else has experienced something like this? I called Air Bnb last night after the third time he pressed the issue about her being allowed to sleep over without being on the reservation. Air Bnb said they would notate my account with my concerns but now it’s escalating.

He’s been here for three nights already and has four more nights to go. Based on the way things are happening I truly feel like his next step is going to be to return and bring her into the home. I’m such a nice and laid-back person, that I feel bad having to report him and have him kicked out. But at the same time he has crossed a major boundary and violated my House rules which are clearly written and he agreed to. 

what would y’all do?

[Sarah977]

@Alison437  What would I do? I'd say "Well, XX, since it's apparent that you have no intention of respecting me, my house rules and my home, I'm going to suggest that you find another place to stay as soon as possible. And until you do, do not bring your girlfriend or anyone else here again.

And I would call Airbnb and tell them he needs to be rehomed and his reservation needs to be cancelled, with no penalties to you. Make it clear to them that you're a single mom and guests bringing unregistered guest to your property, especially after they have been told no less than 3 times not to, is a safety issue for you, not to mention total disrespect. 

And if he shows up again with the girlfriend, or anyone else, I'd tell him your next call will be to the police to have the trespasser removed.

His only "train of thought" is that he gets to do whatever he likes.

[Helen3]

100% agree with @Sarah977 @Alison437  get back on the phone to Airbnb ask them to cancel the book and ask this 'guest' to leave.

[Alon1]

@Alison437 

Firstly, I never seek anyone's advice as to solving any problem with guests in my home. But that's me and this Community Centre is about sharing problems and seeking advice.

As I see it you have two options. Either terminate the booking or given that you accommodate up to 3 and charge additionally for the 2nd & 3rd persons, request he adds his 'so called girlfriend' to the reservation with payment.

[Helen3]

What a strange and rather unnecessary comment to make @Alon1 .  The whole point of these forums for hosts and guests to ask advice. Why be here if that is how you feel?

[Alon1]

@Helen3 

I gave two answers. Firstly, that I would never seek advice as to how to deal with a guest.

Secondly, I gave the advice that the poster wanted, which is evidently in line with others.

You chose to focus on just the first part of my comments. That's a one-eyed view.

[Helen3]

You could easily have just provided advice @Alon1  - no need to try and make a host who is obviously having a problem they want help with, feel bad about posting.

I didn't comment on the second part of your response because I didn't have an issue with it and Sarah had already provided a comprehensive response with great advice.

[Alon1]

@Helen3 

When I viewed Alison's post there was no response as yet. It turned out Sarah and I composed our responses more or less simultaneously, and posted minutes apart. Only when I clicked Reply to post did I see Sarah's post appear.

We were obviously on the same wavelength in suggesting cancellation. However, I also suggested an alternative, to add the 2nd person to the booking with additional charge as set out by Alison.

My point about not taking other people's advice, is that no one else has had contact with a particular Guest. It's a personal interaction or chemistry, and ultimately one has to decide for oneself. 

[Robin4]

@Alison437 

Alison, you articulated yourself wonderfully, and what you have stated is your perfect right.

After 3 no's, it's apparent that this guest will drive his agenda come what may. The next thing you know he will sneak the 'other person' upstairs and into your sleeping part of the property without your knowledge.

You have a right to ask him to leave at this point,  call CX, you have a rapid contact option being a Superhost, explain that this guest is consistently trying to break one of your house rules and you have safety concerns for not just yourself but your young child.

Some guests just won't take no for an answer, so be pro-active here Alison, it's in your best interests!

Good luck....Cheers.....Rob

[Alison437]

Thank you for this response! I have been pondering for a couple hours; unsure of what the right thing to do is. I almost feel like I’m being mean by taking such a dramatic measure, but I feel like I’m talking to my eight-year-old child having to repeat myself so many times without changing my answer. Even explaining why I have that answer. The difference is my son has an excuse because he’s eight, this guy is definitely in his late 40s or early 50s. I think you’re right and it’s better to take action now so he has time before check out to figure out his future situation.

[Laura2592]

@Alison437 I would ask Airbnb to rehome this guest. I would say to the guest "I know that you dont think this is an issue but I'm very uncomfortable with the fact that you brought your friend into my home. Each host has to make rules for their own safety and comfort and I feel that my space is not good fit for you. I'm asking Airbnb to find you a more suitable accommodation where you can complete your stay. "

Women often apologize when THEY are uneasy. Listen to your gut and keep your boundaries.  It's your house. You are being perfectly reasonable. 

[Robin4]

@Laura2592 

Laura, that is a good point, 'Women often apologize when THEY are uneasy.'  

Men don't, they continue to try and justify their position.

Sole women hosts need to set more specific terms and conditions with their hosting. It's an unfortunate quirk of nature, the male of the species generally considers himself more important than the female. Almost one third of the 'civilized' world seems to forcefully adhere to that belief. Even in our equal opportunity societies, job for job, men still earn more than women, and have an easier road to the 'top jobs'!

Women will seek reason, men will seek justification.....that's why @Alison437  needs to be firm here because this man will not accept no as meaning, no. Sad, but true!

Cheers......Rob

[Mike-And-Helen0]

@Alison437 by overstepping your clearly stated a reasonable house rules (boundaries) he has demonstrated absolute disrespect for you.

Not a good fit, making you uncomfortable and needs to stay elsewhere.

[Clara116]

@Alison437 How did it turn out?? Keep us posted we are on your team and hope to support you. 

Hope he's gone and learned his lesson.

best to you

[Alison437]

So after many calls to customer service as the situation had been progressing. I made a decision to simply confront the guest and talk to him about the issue and how it made me feel uncomfortable.

I told him that I had the option to cancel the reservation and Air Bnb would help him relocate. I told him that he had been there enough nights and I felt that he and I had been comfortable that’s far so I didn’t see a need to take such drastic measures. So after many calls to customer service as the situation had been progressing. I made a decision to simply confront the guest and talk to him about the issue and how it made me feel uncomfortable.

I told him that I had the option to cancel the reservation and Air Bnb would help him relocate. I told him that he had been there enough nights and I felt that he and I had been comfortable that’s far so I didn’t see a need to take such drastic measures. So I told him that I was choosing not to take that action so long as he agreed to not repeat the action and to respect my wishes and my rules.

Had it not been the weekend and a chance that I would not get rebooked( because sometimes on the weekend people have already made their reservations and they are already settled in and not seeking new accommodations), although with the history of my listing, I’m usually booked every day even if it’s last minute. I still didn’t wanna take the chance on losing partial payment I had already received for his eight day stay. I am running a business after all.

He seem to receive my information well and there hasn’t been any other mention of it and I don’t see anything weird happening via my ring doorbell.