Stop Negotiating With Guests Who Already Decided to Leave You a Bad Review

[Alice1947]

Let me say something most hosts don’t want to admit:

If a guest is already building a case against you…
the review is already written.

And no — giving a refund won’t save you.

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The Biggest Mistake Hosts Keep Making

A guest starts complaining.

Then:

• “Can we get a discount?”
• “This wasn’t what we expected…”
• “We’re not happy…”

You try to be a good host.

You respond fast.
You apologize.
You offer solutions.
Maybe even a partial refund.

And then?

They leave you a bad review anyway.

---

Here’s What’s Really Happening

This is not a “difficult guest.”

This is a strategy.

The pattern is always the same:

1. They test you with small complaints
2. They ignore what was clearly written
3. They escalate emotionally
4. They push for a refund
5. They use the review as leverage

At this point, you’re not hosting anymore.

You’re being managed by the guest.

---

My Rule: The Moment I See Bad Faith — I Stop Negotiating

No more:

• Off-platform conversations
• Informal agreements
• “Let’s find a middle ground”

Everything goes through Airbnb.

Because once a guest shows bad faith, flexibility becomes a liability.

---

Shift Your Mindset: You’re Not Fixing the Stay — You’re Building a Case

This is where most hosts get it wrong.

They try to recover the experience.

I prepare for review removal.

That means:

• Every message stays on the platform
• Every issue is documented
• Every inconsistency is noted
• Every refusal (like denying repairs) is recorded

I’m not arguing.

I’m building a file.

---

Never Trade Money for “Peace”

This is the hardest pill to swallow:

Bad-faith guests don’t want resolution.

They want advantage.

If you give:

• A discount
• A refund
• Extra concessions

You’re not solving the problem.

You’re confirming to them:

“This host will concede under pressure.”

And the pressure increases.

---

Red Flags You Should Never Ignore

If you see 2–3 of these, stop playing defense:

• Asking for discounts early
• Ignoring instructions and later claiming confusion
• Multiple unrelated complaints at once
• Refusing solutions but continuing to complain
• Escalating tone quickly
• Leaving the property in worse condition

This is not about the stay.

This is about control and leverage.

---

What Actually Protects You

Not kindness. Not speed. Not over-delivery.

What protects you is:

✔ Clear communication inside Airbnb
✔ Evidence (photos, videos, timelines)
✔ Showing you offered reasonable solutions
✔ Showing the guest refused or escalated

Because in the end, Airbnb doesn’t judge feelings.

They judge documentation.

---

Final Truth Most Hosts Learn Too Late

You cannot prevent a bad review from someone who planned to leave one.

But you can:

• Discredit it
• Remove it
• Protect your listing

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So Next Time…

When a guest starts pushing, manipulating, or negotiating aggressively…

Don’t try to “save” the situation.

Recognize it.

Shift strategy.

And remember:

You’re not there to please everyone.
You’re there to protect your business.

[Guy991]

Hello @Alice1947 ,

I would like to expand on the theme you started in your important post. Each person has a different hosting style and strategy, and it is not only about the host themselves but also the type of property, size, amenities, location, and the type of guests that arrive. So not all suggestions work everywhere.

There are some pieces of advice in your post that work for my region and some that don't. For example, you conclude that you cannot prevent a bad review from someone who planned to leave one, and that the answer is to discredit or remove it.

In my case, both parts need a closer look. I can prevent a bad review from a guest who planned to leave one, and there is more than one way to do it — to the point where they end up leaving 5 stars. And as for removal — based on recent posts in this community, that is no longer straightforward. Airbnb is not removing even retaliatory reviews.

So while some of what you mention may be right for your context, it should be framed as such, because for others the practice is quite different.

[Konpan0]

Alice1947さん

とてもいい教訓ありがとうございます。

私も先日、一人の危険なゲストの予約を取り消しました。

今あなたの書いたこの文を読んで、間違いではなかったと確信しました。

---

Alice1947

Thank you for the very valuable lesson.

I also recently canceled a reservation for a dangerous guest.

After reading what you just wrote, I'm convinced it wasn't a mistake.

[Google translation added by OCM]

[Zheng49]

I'm not convinced this strategy works when the review removal process is taken care by AI these days. But yea, before the whole AI thing this way was a lot more feasible. 

[Konpan0]

「有効かどうかは疑問」とは、何に対してのことでしょうか？AIが登場したことによって何が変わったのですか？教えてもらえますか？

[Alice1947]

Hi @Zheng49, 

Its important to do the writing with the AI already, and ask for the AI to meet criteria, but as I said, you must understand the type of guest, the situation and access the problem with a clear protocol, and use AI to each oficial communication so you can get redirected to a human who will evaluate the problem, hopefully with fairness. 

All the best and thank you for the feedback on the post! 

Alice 

[Elaine701]

I'm in agreement with all your points. However, I take a bit different approach:

No reason to complain.

Strive to prevent any reason for the guest to complain about anything. Sparkling clean, comfortable, fully outfitted, everything working, lots of unlisted extras.  Under promise - over deliver.

Avoid unhappy guests.

Some guests will be unhappy no matter what. Ask a few friendly questions before they book it. Their answers (or lack of them) can reveal a lot. Demanding inquiries are told "Sorry, we want our guests to be satisfied with their choice. Here's another place that's better for you (link). Wish you a lovely stay, wherever you end up". Declined. 

Occasionally, one might slip through the cracks, but  I haven't had a bad guest or bad review in years. 

[Christine2602]

J'ai eu récemment un client très satisfait de tout.

Il est auteur et éditeur de bande dessinée pour adultes.

Il m'a reproché de ne pas m'être suffisamment intéressée à ses livres ! 

J'avais bien compris le forcing pour que j'en achète un.

[Translation added by Community manager]

I recently had a client who was very satisfied with everything.

He is an author and publisher of comic books for adults.

He criticized me for not being interested enough in his books! 

I understood perfectly well the pressure they were putting on me to buy one.

[Alice1947]

Hey @Christine2602 , 

Isn't being a host a adventure?

You can find yourself playing just about any role guests want you to play...

but our business is renting the space, not our attention. 

All the best dear!!! 

[Alice1947]

Hi @Elaine701 , 

Loved the part you say decline bad guests, and also the extra amenities strategy. 

All the Best! 

[Konpan0]

予約前にいくつかフレンドリーな質問をしてみるというのは、どんな質問ですか？

中々フレンドリーな質問が思い浮かばなく、そして、中々判断に苦慮しています。

お教えいただきたくお願いします。

[Adriana2233]

Your advice on all points is 100% spot on.  I just had this happen to me.  They were professional airbnb stayers. They stay for work, travel and leisure.  All at the same time.  There were 4 guys staying in my house and maybe 1 woman and a child.  They booked on a short notice then immediately asked for a refund but my policy is firm on refunds. I was conflicted on what I should do and worried that if they stayed after not giving refund would they write a bad review.  I reached out to airbnb and they told me that they could write the bad review but with proper documentation I can dispute it and have it removed.  I recorded the house before their stay and after which they did leave a mess and didn't follow basic checkout rules,  left the house full of trash,  broke into an owner only pantry that was locked, left the hot tub open which got full of debris from wind,  ripped a hole in a screen to plug in an extension cord to their vehicle,  left all the external doors unlocked,  lights on through out.  Cigerette buds everywhere.  Anyway I think you have the picture.   Now i left them a moderate review but sent them a detailed personal review.  I also made note on my account not to rent to them again. 

[Alice1947]

Dear @Adriana2223, 

You handled a lot of things really well — especially documenting everything and keeping communication on Airbnb. That already puts you ahead of most situations like this.

If I could suggest one small adjustment for next time, it would be around the review.

In cases like the one you described, it actually helps the whole host community to be a bit more direct in the public review, not just in the private feedback. When the review is softer than what really happened, the next host doesn’t have full visibility of the risk.

It doesn’t need to be harsh or emotional at all — just clear and factual. Something along the lines of:

• didn’t follow house rules
• left the property in poor condition
• accessed restricted areas without permission
• wouldn’t host again

That last point is especially important, because it signals clearly to other hosts what to expect.

All the best in the future and no more bad guests! 

[Ayse147]

Yes, this post perfectly summarizes the reality many hosts experience. You're absolutely right, especially about the "bad faith guest" strategy and the "buying peace with money" trap.
I acted the same way: when the guest started complaining early, I kept everything within Airbnb messages, didn't show extra flexibility, didn't offer a refund, and documented every step. But unfortunately, the result was the same.
Even though I clearly presented the evidence (messages, photos, timeline, solutions I offered, and the guest's rejection), Airbnb didn't remove the negative review. As I've heard from many hosts, it used to be easier to remove, but in the last year or two (especially after the new AI-powered dispute system), the removal rate has dropped significantly. They say it's almost impossible now.
I've written to them formally many times, tried escalation, spoken to different agents  but got no results. Airbnb generally says it's "the guest's subjective experience" and doesn't support the host enough. Many hosts complain that they "protect malicious guests, not us." I've heard from some hosts that "it's possible to pay Airbnb staff to delete reviews," but I've absolutely never done that and I don't recommend it.

[Joelle43]

Hello @Ayse147 

I agree with you that it has been increasingly difficult to remove reviews, even retaliatory ones but am surprised by the statement that you can bribe Airbnb staff to remove reviews!

There will always be scammers who will say that they can do this but like you, wouldn't entertain that type of action either.  Is this an urban myth I wonder?!