Use Air BnB houses as safe houses for people escaping domestic violence

[Lyn8]

Hello everyone,

For a fair while, every time I read something about domestic violence, I think of Air B n B and the world wide resource of fully furnished houses, r4eady to go.  How about we get together and start a support programme for victims of domestic violence.  

From what I can gather, one of the major hurdles facing people with children to escape from a violent partner is the absence of anywhere 'normal' to escape to.  There is often the option of staying with family, but many people are reluctant to do so.  This would be from not wanted to upset their family and also the option to kind of squeeze in somewhere is problematic.  A big reason is that the perpetrator of the violence usually knows where their victims family lives.

As a community, Air B n B hosts could offer short to longer term accommodation to victims.  This would give them somewhere anonymous to go which is already well set up for family life.  

I know there would be much to discuss between Air B n B and the host community.  However we could sort out the problem of compensation by creating a fund which could be drawn upon to compensate hosts for their accomodation use.

Let me know what you all think please.  

Regards,

Lyn

[Mike-And-Helen0]

@Lyn8 laudable aim, but I have to protect my own family.

When there is a chance the perpetrator will track down the abused person...at my address.

[Cj61]

then don't sign up @Mike-And-Helen0.

I think it is a great idea @Lyn8 Lyn. If a Survivor is able to travel a distance from her regular residence then it could be a safe option. There would be many factors to consider but it could be doable. When I worked at a refuge there were procedures to increase safety and if hosting had been around then like it is now it could've been a way to increase options. We had to turn away at least as many as we accommodated purely because of lack of facilities. And, yes, many had to return home with their little children in tow to further abuse because they'd tried to unsuccessfully escape.

[Juan63]

Op asked for thoughts on the idea including dissenting ones. Huge concerns that could lead to dangerous results.

[Gordon0]

Like @Mike-And-Helen0, I think it's a very nice idea, but unless managed professionally and extremely securely, it has 'danger' written all over it. It's not the sort of thing that can be done as a 'hobby' because people's lives are at risk, and those who need the support are dealing with highly-charged emotions and thoughts.

Distance is very rarely a safety net in these situations. 

Good luck @Lyn8 and @Cj61 in your endeavours. 

[Helen3]

I don't this this would be practical as hosts aren't vetted and the person experiencing domestic violence could walk from one situation to another where they could be in a vulnerable situation with a host.

There is also a risk of the partner turning up and committing further acts of violence.

I think a better option would be for hosts to be able to give a donation from any accommodation which is booked,  which could go towards supporting those without a home such as refugees, those fleeing domestic violence and young people experiencing homelessness.

Even a small donation from hosts could soon add up particularly in cities and larger towns and make a huge difference to those who have nowhere to go.

[Trevor243]

I support male victims of domestic abuse - there are a lot of them - and I can tell you now that using AirBnB places for victims is not a good idea. Victims need a safe place with security - gated, restricted entry, CCTV etc - and someone on-site to supervise, advise, call police etc etc. Ex partners follow their victims "home" to the safe houses. Donate to a charity if you want to. The charities do some very good work. Remember that men can be victims too - and many of them do nothing because they think they just won't be believed.

[Sarah977]

@Trevor243  Neither the OP nor any of the responders mentioned gender at all in respect to domestic violence. I think we all know that it can come from either.

[Jackie570]

Domestic abuse survivor here.

There are legal hurdles; victims need restraining orders and no-contact orders specific to their residences and that won't work if they are only staying in one place for a couple of days. Also, victims need a place to have their mail sent and communications to go so they don't have to go back to where they were living to receive documents. A lot of victims escape without their IDs, birth certificates, or other paperwork and must have those replaced in order to find work or get other help, so a permanent address is vital.

Many (not all) victims need support and counseling to keep them from returning to their abusers or inviting their abusers over to talk things through. Domestic abuse is a cycle, not an event, and we as hosts are not qualified to deal with the fallout from it. 

This is all without even mentioning that there is an unstable, violent person who may attempt to injure or even murder someone who is staying at your house. 

[Sarah977]

@Jackie570  Thanks for your "boots on the ground" contribution here. Many people have the best of intentions re helping those less fortunate than themselves, without understanding all the ramifications.

[Sudsrung0]

  Bad idea what happens when "Those less fortunate" turn violent and you cant get them out of your property? We had one recently who had split up from her B/F booked one of my places for 2 days she obviously told the B/F where she was staying every morning he would come round drunk banging on the door disturbing other guest in the resort, we had to throw here out drink and drugs Forget it

[Jacqueline1181]

I am in Boulder Colorado 2 small dogs now homeless due to DV and STALKING is there anywhere I can ask for place to stay i am willing to do anything to help with house I had life flight coma breathing machine now struggle with PTSD and no housing is keeping me on hamster wheel no criminal background 60 yrs old thank you for any ideas God bless 

[Jennifer4106]

Hi y'all,

Reaching out as I'm a 41 DV/financial victim. Im looking for any help on any open places for my 13 year old daughter, myself, and 3 year old beagle who is an ESA. He was sole provider and when with 3.04 in my account.  We slept in the park a few nights until my family was able to help put us in the current airbnb we are in. I lost everything except our clothing. Any leads or any help would be so appreciated ❤️ I now know and understand why victims go back. 

[Tonia705]

Hello!

Does anyone know of the program this is through? The irony is I have been a contracted  property mgr and concierge for vacation homes for several years.

I am a mom of 2. I have had a safe plan in place for 3 years.  I finally saved enough for a car, called the hotline and left.  I have full custody of my children.  All I was told was to wait and call back every 4 hours. The hundreds of resources I was given to get a hotel voucher all send me in circles with just other referrals. The only place that I even had any emotional support was the Catholic Church. They were frustrated as they too tried calling the list with no results. 

The goal for shelter is immediate safety. With connection to an advocate that will assist in planning the trip out of state. 

My children are safe in a home temporarily. I have been on the phone full time in between delivering for door dash for gas and trying to afford a cheap airbnb room. It's just  circle with no progress. The wear and tear has caused my vehicle to need maintenance.  

My situation is rather unique in that I have been contracted as the welcome host coordinator with vacation home owners. This involves cleaning and inspections of the units. So I can work in exchange for the assistance.

I have a clean background, IVP-lev1 Clearance  Card, no drug abuse history and 20 years of excellence in all fields of hospitality combined with training with Disney, Hilton, St. Regis, Ritz Carlton and Gaylord. I recently finished my AA in legal studies as well. 

Right now I am even looking for a live/ work property position that oversees the booking, cleaning, maintenance and performs inspections, adjusting what's needed for the new arrival. I also provide concierge services for 

The guests. Pre arrival special event baskets, personal shopper and custom made guide book to fit the guests needs. 

I have a clean background, IVP-lev1 Clearance  Card, no drug abuse history and 20 years of excellence in all fields of hospitality combined; Disney, Hilton, St. Regis, Ritz Carlton,  Gaylord, are some of the few I have worked for.

I am willing to relocate as soon as possible to start a position like this.  

I am from upstate NY and have been residing in Arizona for 9 years. 

If anyone knows of any resources or is a host that would be in interested in collaborating via video (out of state) or in person,  please let me know. 

**

Thank you! 

For privacy 

Signed,

Tee

**[Sensitive information removed in line with the Community Center Guidelines]

[Jaimie39]

I could use one of there now been in bad domestic violence relationship fighting charges on top of my mother dyjn while trying to maintain college I don't feel safe idk what to do