Woke up to this message

[Laura2592]

No reviews. Staying to celebrate their "mini moon."

"Hi Laura!!
We’re super excited to visit this weekend! I got some chocolate covered strawberries for us to celebrate after our mini wedding and I am having them delivered to the cottage on Friday. I’m not sure what time they’ll arrive from Sherri’s Berries, but if you happen to see them, would you be able to put them inside for us? We were also wondering if we could have a log for our stay and whether we would be allowed to use the outdoor fire pit on Saturday to roast marshmallows? Do we supply our own wood for that? Thank you so much"

We:

1. Do not allow deliveries/mail/packages for guests in ANY WAY. Clearly stated in the rules (which they claim to have read-- they did send over the code when booking.)

2. Are not on site and will therefore not be able to put any berries inside (also stated that we are not onsite)

3. Leave a firelog for indoors with every stay through March 31 (also clearly stated in the rules.) Plus the weather will be in the 70s over the weekend so probably too warm for an indoors fire.

4. Typically leave strawberries and a bottle of sparkling wine with chilled glasses for honeymooners as a surprise.

If I have a repeat of the clueless honeymooners who dropped a flaming firelog on my porch when they did not understand how to open the flue I may lose what is left of my mind. This does not bode well.

[Laura2592]

Also they are checking in on Friday. So I am more confused about why they won't be there on Friday to get berries (that they are not supposed to have delivered anyway...)

[Colleen253]

@Laura2592 Oof. Have fun tackling this one. Can’t help chuckling a bit at “if you happen to see them…” Where does she imagine you’ll be that you’ll see the berries and put them inside? Very strange, all around.

How many more stays are there to test you before you’re done?

[Laura2592]

@Colleen253 eight more with 2 additional possible stays. The countdown has begun!

[Kitty-and-Creek0]

@Laura2592 

Good issues to bring forward, important ones - 

Another message for the coffee table book! Hang in there, Laura, keep breathing. This will be OK. Being off site always has its issues and concerns, especially where there is access to a fireplace, fire pit, etc. We had fireplace issues at the resort, and the only way we were able to keep guests from smoking the place out was to demonstrate the damper for them, build a proper fire and call their attention to how it was laid. With the fire pit and bbq we made sure they did not squirt fire starter on it, ditto with the indoor fireplace. Keeping the chimneys and roofs clean was also a must, even more so when they burned pine, a soft wood that gums up chimneys. Here at home we do not allow open flames of any kind indoors or out. We have an electric tabletop grill for outdoor use as a bbq. It is an excellent one, a well known high end brand, so guests are happy using it. The risk of fire here is always enormous, so we're really firm on that safety issue.

Kitty

[Deb216]

@Laura2592 Oh Laura!  I don't know what the rest of us will do without your entertainment!  I will definitely miss you!  Hang in there...and please update us after this one.

[Mark116]

@Laura2592  Oh dear!   Better remind her there is 'wildlife' around and a box of fruit/chocolate might not last too long if its sitting outside all day.  

[Kitty-and-Creek0]

@Mark116 @Laura2592 

Oh, definitely! Food on the porch or in a car would not last long here at all. 

[Laura2592]

@Mark116 and @Kitty-and-Creek0 we are going to have some very happy squirrels/raccoons. 

[Laura2592]

Despite telling this guest we do not allow deliveries and could not accept her berries, there was a delivery attempt this morning. I can't tell if they left them or not as they may have placed them inside the screen door.

[Kitty-and-Creek0]

@Laura2592 

Not responsible for filching by wildlife! Even my strawberry plants are chewed to the ground by critters, if I don't protect them...

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

Oh @Laura2592 😄

[Laura2592]

Now they can't figure out how to open the flue....I think I have ptsd with honeymooners. 

What is it about these people?? Literally zero problem with the flue all winter. Fires a plenty. 

Give me strength 

[Sarah977]

@Laura2592  I wonder if they also need instructions on how to consummate their marriage? 🙂

[Sarah977]

@Laura2592 You realize this is the universe just letting you know that if you were entertaining any doubts about quitting hosting, it is cementing your decison? 🙂