First time in the community and I'm perplexed about our current guest registration.

The gentleman has one review, a positive one just for him.  He came with his family to stay at our place yesterday.  I'm sure he and his wife would be nice guests if it were just for them, but their children were not prepared to be a guest in someone's home.  Don't get me wrong, we love having children in the home but we do prefer children whose parents don't allow certain behavior.  This family would have been better suited for a hotel stay rather than a private home.

They arrived 2 hours before our noted check-in time, but we assumed that their early afternoon arrival indicated they had plans to visit a local park or some other local activity and wanted to drop off their bags.  They announced that we were their intended activity.  ??  They proceeded to allow their children to run all over the house with food and drink in hand, spilling crums and liquid all over the floors and mashing his sticky face into the windows.  The older child was very afraid of our dog, so we put him in the garage as a courtesy, but our listing indicates that we have both a dog and a cat so we were disapointed that they'd bring a child who is afraid of dogs.  We let them do their thing in the spaces rented via AirB&B and graciously allowed their sticky & messy activities to spill over into the rest of the home.  We were preoccupied with our own activities throughout the day.  The parents didn't seem bothered by the children running throughout the house & yard, or the children giving us orders as the day progressed. We did ignore and redirect the child as he ordered us around, it was already quite awkward by this time.

It appears they left the home in the middle of the night.  We heard them up and about at 1 am, and when we awoke at 5 we saw that they had left.  The spaces were a big mess with food in the beds and all over the floors, but this was to be expected even in their sudden departure.  There was no note or message. 

Unfortunately, at the same time the air mattress that was set up for the older child appears to have begun to lose it's seal just prior to their arrival.  The mattress is a new replacement and been used for 5 previous guests so I did not suspect that it was failing until these guests arrived and I showed them to their room, but I hoped it wasn't broken and showed them the switch to re-fill the air.  After seeing the child jumping on the mattress later in the day and playing with the switch to inflate the bed I asked them not to allow it because that will damage the air mattress.  I checked in on them prior to our going to bed and noted that the air mattress was deflated more than before and wanted to see if they had any requests or needs before we turned in for the night.  In the morning the air mattress was indeed quite deflated and has certainly failed (I have since refilled the air and see that it does have a slow leak).  I do not feel it is right to blame them for this damage, only note that it is unfortunate that it happened at all and may be the cause of their midnight departure. 

I did leave them a message via the platform apologizing for the failure of the air bed and noting that they left unexpectedly, apologizing for any other failure on our part.

I am hesitant to leave a poor review for the father's account as I'm sure he would be a pleasant guest on his own, or with his wife, and I will not blame them for the airbed failure, but how do I craft an appropriate review?  Do we offer them a refund?  I do expect a poor review from them and I'm unsure how to deal with that, if at all.  How would my fellow hosts handle such a situation?

Thank you for your input ~

** Update - the guest did reply to my message inquiring about their sudden departure and he said it was because the baby would not sleep, and while the air bed was unfortunate it was not the reason they left.  He was polite and appreciative.

While I'm relieved, I'm still unsure how to craft a review of their stay.  We have had families stay before and we have never had such an experience.

19 Replies 19
Level 10
Kendal, United Kingdom


"The gentleman has one review, a positive one just for him. He came with his family to stay at our place yesterday. I'm sure he and his wife would be nice guests if it were just for them, but their children were not prepared to be a guest in someone's home."


We regularly get this where a guest with otherwise fine reviews ends up being quite challenging. It is exactly this group dynamics. Just because one person in a group of eight knows the house rules doesn't mean that the other seven get to find out nor even feel compelled to abide by them.


There really should be a process where all the guests are identified and informed about the house rules by Airbnb prior to arrival so that there is complete clarity.


The current situation of reviewing guests based on a group is flawed. The guest is responsible for the group yet some guests are incapable of controlling their group in this way.


Other platforms don't present this issue. I think the reputation of Airbnb as being a gatecrashing party platform is the problem. Having all guests registered on a booking would be the answer as well as transgressions by groups being more harshly dealt with by Airbnb.


Children under 16 would not need to register however, so parental responsibility in this case would be the measure to judge by.

I had a guest Merle p.Tucker Reservation # HMAFF5J53M  who stayed at my home longer than the check out date that it says Merle checked out by.  She was to check out on a Wednesday but instead checked out on Friday morning around 4:30am.  When you speak with this guest she is very personable and very articulate with great stories.  So you can not help but enjoy speaking with her... then you accidentally find out how many people and animals are really at your home.

How does a host add the extra days she stayed especially if the reservation has already happened?  And Airbnb has already paid for that reservation?

So (#1)  - She remained at my home past her check-out date.  

Does Airbnb have a way to charge the guest for the extended days she remained at the home?  

Also (#2) - On the reservation this guest reserved the home for "2 dogs" and "2 people"  in reality this guest had placed around 76 dogs inside my home not including little puppies;  on my reservation profile it clearly states that the first dog is free but the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, ...etc...  is a $25.00 charge.  

What does Airbnb do in a case like this?  

How does Airbnb add the dog fee?

Also (#3)  because of the animals this guest had to hire workers to help her with transporting dogs; feeding; etc... so this guest hired workers/employee's;  took the hinges off my door and broke into my private (no guest usage written in the profile owners garage and owners closet)  the employees stole items from inside  the owners garage and owners closet.

How does Airbnb protect the host and help get back  the stolen items or help to reimburse for the stolen items?

(#4)  What and How does Airbnb go about to help the host when there is damage this guest has caused?

 Between the animals and workers they backed right into my garage door; the dogs   had pretty much they had free range of the inside and outside of my home  running around and jumping  up on my couches; chairs;throw rugs;  eating walls; furniture,  the dogs were shedding, peeing, pooing and some where in heat which ended up getting all over my furniture and carpet and throw carpet, the tile on the inside of my home and on the outside of my home.  

What or how does Airbnb have to help the host to get my home free from the smell, clogged pipes, clogged filter on the a/c; my washing machine had hair stuck to the inside of it is there any help from Airbnb for all the damage these dogs have and are costing me to get my home back up to par. Although because of the blood and urine I do not think my upholstered living room couch and chairs and wool throw carpet can be saved. My leather couches have claw marks and bites; my walls have bite marks from the dogs.

I have cords chewed; etc.

The guest claimed she was renting my home with only two dogs and two people.  

She had an RV up at my home; she stayed longer (past) her check-out date.  

I am trying to get home home free from the smells;damage; etc.  

How does Airbnb go about to charge this guest for all the damage she has caused?

How does Airbnb cover the host for opening up her home with open arms only to have  damage this person has caused costing more then that of the current reservation ?



I am totally  beside myself.

M.chelle Dimitro


40050 Camino Arroyo Seco Road

Temecula, CA 92592

Level 10
Chicago, IL

@Ricky-B-Crouse0 This is a fairly old thread. You should start a new one posting your question. I would recommend refraining from posting any personal details about you and your guest. Keep in mind that this is a community forum, not Airbnb headquarters so any replies would be recommendations from other hosts. 

Level 10
Placencia, Belize

"..and graciously allowed their sticky & messy activities to spill over into the rest of the home."


The guests are indeed better suited to stay in a hotel, if anything because their unruly ways there wouldn't  have been so easily accomodated since they would have been confined to their own 'padded cell'. 

Level 10
Sayulita, Mexico

@Wes-and-Lisa0  Why are you sure they have learned from this experience? They are obviously used to letting their little darlings run wild without respect for other people or anything else. This parenting behavior didn't start when they arrived at your home.

" Guests allowed their children free rein in the home, running around everywhere, included shared spaces, with food and drink, which required extensive clean-up, allowed their child to use the new air mattress as a trampoline, resulting in its demise, and made no attempt to clean up after themselves. Children gave "orders" to the hosts. Have no idea if guests would have been more responsible traveling without their offspring, but as a family situation, unfortunately cannot recommend."

Thank you all for your input.  We have never had an experience like this one and we were quite speechless over it this morning.  We agree that it is important to let other potential hosts know how this visit went but we don't want to cast too dark of a cloud over them either, I'm sure they've learned from this experience (I hope anyway). 

We will be following some of the advice above, and we appreciate having a place to get input from people who have had experience as hosts. 

Level 9
Assenede, Belgium

We often have children staying over with their parents. I do work with people with special needs and i am used to setting boundaries every day. I know its not easy but when we have children of friends or guests staying over and they behave in a way i dont like i tell them in a polite way.


For example....i would like you to have your cookie while sittibg at the table because crumbs.. 

Please dont walk while you are might fall or spill water while doing soo.

I would like it if you would wash your hands after you played in the sand because blabla.


Could you please not touch the walks or windows.. .with your hands. Otherwise your mum/ dad has to stay here tomorrow cleaning instead of visiting the beach.

Do put voundaries to both parents and child. Maybe certain things you could mentain making a joke around it.


Other families with children can just be a nightmare and nothing will help. In that case you can only count the hours untill check out

Level 10
West Vancouver, Canada

Just be a matter of fact, to the point and leave personal comments about parenting to yourself perhaps

Yes, and this was part of my concern regarding crafting a review. 

Level 10
Rio de Janeiro, Brazil


In the review you could say the truth: "I recommend them as couple. With children they are better suited for a hotel stay."

If you want to be very kind but also say the truth, you could say only "I recommend them as couple" and advice them in private message that, they should not allow certain behaviors from the part of their children.

Another option, is - Do not leave a review and message them in private that they should not allow certain behaviors from the part of their children.
You would be being kind to them, and also giving a good advice to help them and other hosts.

As for the refund or compensation, it is a private matter. If you feel better if you offer it, do it.


 Forgot to say:

When rating the items "cleanness" (place was left in a mess) and "communication" (checkin time and leaving without any notice) give them 3 or 2 stars, according to you judgment.

Thank you for your input here.  Yes, I agree that it would be best to leave a private message with advice and leave a less specific public review. 


I'm not sure why you are hesitant to leave a negative review..... they seem like the poster family for "bad guests". I'd give them less than 3 stars rating for cleanliness, house rules and communication without a second thought. 


They did not respect your check-in time, Your home was a mess. The apparently did not read your listing description properly or acknowledge the presence of your dog before arrival. They left without proper communication. And imo, any parent that let's their children behave in such a manner in someone else's home could not be a "good" guest regardless of whether he travels with his children or not.


If you had known what that guest family had the potential to do and were given the choice to host them or not.....would you have still wanted them as guests? 


I always think of honest reviews as for the sake of other fellow hosts. Please be honest and factual - you don't need to go into details. 


Guest and family arrived prior to check-in time. Children left food residue all over the house which required extensive cleaning. We clearly state the presence of our pets, but had to keep our dog caged for the duration of their stay because one of the children was afraid of dogs. The children ran around the house & yard and they tried to order us (hosts) around which we firmly ignored or redirected. The actions and behavior of the children made us very uncomfortable in our own home, and considering the amount of cleaning needed after their abrupt departure, we would not welcome these guests back in our home. 


Considering the mess they left...... why would you want to refund them? Unless a guest point-blank asks for a refund, you shouldn't worry about refunding money. 

I suppose my concern primarily was how to craft a review, not so much not wanting to leave one.  We were both just so taken aback this morning by the whole thing. 

Yes, other hosts need to be advised for future reservations.

And my concern regarding a refund was regarding the air bed - we failed to provide what we had advertised with that.  And if that was the reason they up and left in the middle of the night then that is a legitimate matter. 

Level 10
Austin, TX

But if the child’s mistreatment of the bed is the reason it was flat then you don’t owe them a refund. Rather, they owe you for damage

The bed was losing air before their arrival as I noticed it upon their arrival.  I cannot blame the child for the damage because it appears to have begun before he arrived.  Granted I do believe he worsened it.

Level 10
Lincoln, Canada

@Wes-and-Lisa0I agree with @John1080: you have to review him as the guest he was, not the guest he potentially could be if he was there by himself. As the parent, it was his job to step in and redirect or correct his kids, and he didn't, by the sounds of things. Sounds like a job for "Guest and his family are more suited to a hotel environment" review to me. 

Level 10
Westcliffe, CO

@Alexandra316 Yes, and he let the kids run wild, which is what @Wes-and-Lisa0 can say and which is reflective of him. Given the experience, other hosts need to know. 

I agree that other hosts need to know.  I guess I was stuck with how to word my review more than whether or not to leave one at all.
I do appreciate having a group of people to give me input here. 

Level 10
Westcliffe, CO

I would leave a negative review, as I’m doubtful that someone who allows children to behave that way would himself be a thoughtful guest on his own. 


He he needs to be held accountable and other hosts need to know. 

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