When another host abuses you!

[David3267]

You know Airbnb is going downhill when another host direct messages you calling you a f****** d*** and an a******* in two separate messages and Airbnb does nothing about it! Both messages reported to Airbnb but the (bot generated?) replies say the review cannot be removed. I'm not too bothered by her review and didn't even ask for it to be removed even though its a ranting, factually incorrect diatribe. My issue is 1) Airbnb do nothing about this abusive behaviour 2) they clearly do not read or are unable to understand a clearly written, detailed complaint about this host, supported with the fact she was brazen enough to write these abusive things via messages which are clearly visible to Airbnb 3) they hide behind confidentiality as their excuse for doing nothing 4) Perhaps most concerning is that despite my 4 star rating of her (obviously before the abusive messages started) she still appears on her profile as the perfect 5* guest. Obviously I ticked the "I would not host again option" but now even doubt if this is registered against her. So, the moral is, even as a super host (but as long as you're playing the guest card, you can be as personally abusive  & foul mouthed as you wish without any obvious sanction. Any one from Airbnb wish to comment on this as all i get is, case closed, case closed...???

[David3267]

"While profanity and name-calling is restricted in public reviews and listings, I don't think it's forbidden in private messages" Well that's just tremendous. Let's all play by the rules, shall we? So, if I was to type... F£ck off you silly little c%nt... that would be perfectly fine with you would it...as long as it's in a private message rather than on this forum?

[Anonymous]

@David3267   Would it be fine with me? Well, I wouldn't feel like we were bound to become best mates if you called me a misogynistic slur. But I wouldn't feel that some kind of action needed to be taken against you in revenge, either. I'd just leave the conversation and get on with my life.

[Helen744]

@David 3267 not sure who you are replying to David , just a joke on my part of course to lighten the mood .Taken as I do swear, but never at a guest and I do expect a guest to have the modicum of manners not to swear at me . Remember to put the name of the person you are replying to in when you reply not your own as it will appear. cheers H

[Laura2592]

@David3267 This review reads as "I am not from around here and want things the way I am used to." I didn't really see much that would help me decide to book unless I was really worried about my car. 

As an American who doesn't drive, I am always puzzled by car culture in the US, particularly when traveling (yes I am weird, and I realize this is a Canadian guest). We have a neighbor at our New Orleans weekend place who offers her unit on Airbnb. The location is awesome-- 4-5  blocks from just about anything you want. Its a walking location and Lyft/Uber is very plentiful for those who prefer to ride. There is no secured parking for guests. The listing states all of this clearly. Yet she STILL gets people who insist on bringing a car for a short stay, who complain about street parking, who complain that tourist spots in the French Quarter don't have parking, who complain about walking, who complain about the weather, who don't research when huge festivals are taking place and then complain about crowds or being unable to get a table at a restaurant they want to go to, etc. These are the guests who expect a host to serve as concierge, transport and tour guides. When I read this review--( I couldn't get a reservation at a restaurant in one of the UKs most popular summer destinations!)-- I simply thought "this person needs a tour group or all inclusive resort." Just a poor fit for what you can offer. 

There is no excuse for abusive language and I am sorry that happened to you. This guest does seem better suited to a hotel overall. I might gently suggest that she take some time to do a bit of googling before her next trip abroad. I am sure that over time if she hosts herself, she will understand that not all spots are a great fit for all guests.

[David3267]

"There is no excuse for abusive language and I am sorry that happened to you"... thanks, you seem the only person who gets my point that personal abusive language is not acceptable !

[Helen744]

@David3267 the issue of abuse is also caused , well not caused but facilitated by giving the guest a mobile number especially your private one. This is a hazard of doing business and occaisonally an abusive guest will use this ,knowing full well that this cannot be traced to them . When it begins it is wise to immediatley state that all messages must go onto the app and hang up and block the phone number Dont give up just yet H

[Huma0]

@David3267 

If a guest messaged me calling me  a" fu£kin d£ck and an ar£ehole", I'd not be happy about it either. I would report and block them. However, I wouldn't hold out that much hope that Airbnb would do anything about it despite the reporting.

Airbnb CS is really hit and miss. I've had one situation where I was thanked profusely for being the only host who had reported someone who was trying to scam literally thousands of hosts and that user was instantly blocked from using the platform. I've had another situation where Airbnb prompted me to be suspicious of a guest, I called up CS, was told to report and block the guest, yet she remains on the platform using a fake profile (instead of her original one with a really damning review) to book listings from unsuspecting hosts. 

At least by blocking this guest, you never need to hear from her again. Unless she also creates a new profile (you're not really allowed to do this but Airbnb seem to let people get away with it as I've mentioned above) at least people can see on her profile that she behaved less than appropriately in her messages to you.

I agree with @Laura2592 in terms of how I would interpret her review of you. I would stay well clear of this guest if she tried to book with me. However, I am seeing it from the perspective of a host, not a guest, i.e. that a guest should not blame a host because they failed to read or understand the info provided or are incapable of doing any of their own research on a location. 

By the way, did you check out the reviews she has left for other hosts before you accepted her booking (you can do this a bit more quickly using the AirReview Chrome extension, although it is quite glitchy and doesn't always load properly)? Sometimes a guest can have lots of positive reviews, but a lot of red flags in the reviews they have left for their hosts.

Personally, I stopped assuming early on that fellow hosts would be good guests. Of the Airbnb hosts who have stayed with me, I'd say at least 50% were problematic.

[David3267]

thank you for your well considered response, will vet other hosts I'm hosting from now on, shame it has to come to this as I always (naively?) believed in the community ethos

[Helen744]

@David 3267 now this is seriously passive aggressive  ,cowardly and sneaky and is a sympton of bullying and how to get away with it , honed by some facebook and online people . It is very regrettable and sad . Report her for bullying . It is also turning up here in the community centre as an issue H

[Helen744]

@David3267 . now this is seriously passive aggressive ,cowardly and sneaky and is a sympton of online bullying and how to get away with it. it is very regrettable and sad. Report her for bullying . It is also turning up here in the community centre as an issue H

[Helen744]

also David as an afficianado of swearing  I would like this person to know that random swearing at the host ,who is responsible for providing your actual bed is very foolish ,but Use 'heirloom swearing ' such as ' go and stick your head up a dead bears bum' and other family treasures. Cheers H

[David3267]

never heard of heirloom swearing but slightly frightened to google it!!!

[Helen744]

@David3267 dont bother . I made it up ,not to say it wont enter the lexicon with a little help . H

[Gillian166]

I'm yet to see any actual bullying here, although nowadays far too people tend to describe "disagreeing with me" as "bullying and harassment", especially when they cant hold their own in a discussion, or the minute you start quoting actual facts.   

some people, like our OP, also claim they are "done" with airbnb and these forums, and pretend to flounce out, but then continue to stay until they find a few people who support his view. oh the drama!  

Read the reviews @Helen744  The guest left an ok review, with some silly ranting about how crowded the place is in high season, most people would just think she's a twit, and probably couldn't find a carpark as well. his review of her was far worse, and his response to her review was silly and immature. Even if you wanted to call her out publicly for swearing in the chat, there's better ways to have done than making yourself look unhinged.  

Digging a little deeper I see he also has responded on another guest's review who left a nicely worded review, perhaps dinged him in the stars somewhere, and he responded poorly again, even though he left a good review for them initially.   And, there's been a few guests who have mentioned parking, and he hasn't responded at all to this concern, which IMHO is the only issue to truly to be discussed publicly in those responses. Save the drama for the message box. 

[Helen744]

@Gillian166 I get it Gillian, obviously David posted here because he was particularly upset about personal abuse not public . He has no recourse except possibly this forum which by the way is expressly for these types of discussions H