@Lisa-and-Agnès0@Marta83
Awesome cultural observations but I guess that lots of taboos are forgotten and ignored by most Chinese nowadays. Also, they are usually forgiving and tolerant to foreigners who may not know the Chinese culture well.
One major difference between Chinese and non-Chinese (esp. Westerners) is that Chinese people value friendship and family ties more than anything else, and so they may treat "their own people" well while remaining indifferent to strangers. This has been confirmed by Francis Fukuyama's "The Origins of Political Order." In the book, the author argues that in history Europeans used to value kinship as much as the Chinese did, but Christianity undermined the family and individualism arose.
I also read that though China, Japan and Korea all have their values and ethics built on Confucian doctrines, each country has their own focus. Japan focuses on loyalty, so they have the most loyal and obedient employees in the world. Korea cares more about filial piety, and so when a woman marries a Korean man, she will have to serve his mother well, too. China values human ties, to which there is both pros and cons. Cons because it can often mean that they may want to get away with established rules just in consideration of maintaining human ties. For example, if a policeman catches you speeding, and he happens to be dating your sister, then he probably won't give you a ticket.
But there are also lots of pros, which means if you welcome them to your house, they might already consider you "their own people" if they receive welcoming and accomodating vibes instead of "we and the Other" attitude. Many Chinese people have asked me what kind of gifts they should prepare for their foreign Airbnb hosts. I always recommend Peking Opera dolls and masks, papercut, Suzhou sandal wood fans, etc.
Being Chinese and having hosted 4 Chinese guests, I loved these fellow country(wo)men, though we are aware of the demonization of Chinese tourists all over the world.
Of the 4 Chinese guests, two of them were a mother and daughter, who cleaned the guest bathroom and kitchen even after others used them. And a young guy who would like to invite me to dinner after I took him to a friend's dinner party. And an older guy originally from Taiwan, who shared with me his bittersweet diasporic stories and his dream that Taiwan and Mainland would be united one day if the Chinese government accepts democracy. He came here to buy a condo to live with his wife after retirement and after three children all had moved out to live on their own, and told me that he would only look for condos near my house because he wanted to be my neighbour. I loved them so much and I miss them so much.
