A little strange guest, I ask for help with writing a review.

[Anna9170]

Two days ago I had a guest, who booked my apartment for 2 nights. 

She arrived about 15 hours, all according to the rules, was very pleased with the accommodation, said many compliments. 

It was a little strange that she came by cab, in our region it is VERY expensive and UBER is prohibited. For example, from the city where she was driving to Lloret de Mar, it takes 20 minutes and it's about 50 euros. (To understand, from Barcelona Airport to our city 150 euros, it's one hour away🙄). Just a little strange, given the low cost of the apartment, maybe it does not matter, but just a nuance.

At 1.30 a.m. I received a message from her that because of family problems she had to leave urgently. 

She herself made a "cancellation of the reservation" through the site, and did not ask me about a refund. 

I immediately got out of bed and ran to the apartment to check if everything was ok, because this girl seemed to me a little upset and strange from the beginning. 

In a normal situation, I have an independent departure, the guest closes the door and puts the keys in the mailbox. But here I was very worried that this girl may not close the door at all, for example, or suddenly she destroyed the whole apartment🙈)).

Everything was okay, she asked for 15 minutes to pack up, gave me the keys and waited for her boyfriend on the porch. I offered to wait with her, but she refused and repeated many times that she was okay.

After half an hour I asked her if she was safe and she confirmed that her boyfriend had come for her and everything was fine.

Well, now the question! What should I write about this guest in my review, what nuances will be important for all hosts? 😎

I have no complaints to her, everything in the apartment was perfect, she did not use anything, did not ask for a refund. The only problem was that I had to go at night (I live half an hour from this place), and I have children, I get up early etc. ... However, no problem, these are the nuances of work, but not every host has the opportunity to come at night to check if everything is okay.

What rating will be adequate for this guest and what should I write in the review? I would be very grateful for any opinions.

[Mike-And-Jane0]

I see nothing negative about this guest at all. A normal positive review would be what I would give especially as I wouldn't read (or hear) messages at 1.30am.

[Dale711]

Anna9170

You do a great job in difficult circumstances! An honest review will do.....

Cheers 👍

Mike-And-Jane0

As a responsible host should read every message from the guest, no matter in which times' line......

Peace 🆘

[Alexandra316]

@Anna9170 I think based on what you've said here, I would give the guest a standard positive review. I know that we all have guests we feel are a little off or we just don't mesh with. However, it seems that everything that you've mentioned was more your perception of or reaction to the situation rather than anything  specifically bad that she did. I would leave a standard good review and wish her well. It sounds like she might have been going through something, and I think I'd be tempted to err on the side of grace and compassion considering she didn't do anything wrong, per se, and didn't ask for a refund. You were feeling uncomfortable so you went out to check on the property late at night: I totally get why you wanted to do that, but I don't know that you can blame her for that or mention it in the review. 

[Anna9170]

@Alexandra316  Thank you very much, you perfectly formulated my inflamed mind games. It seems like "something is wrong," but it may be my perception problem. That's what I want to understand, because there is some fatigue after a high season, and maybe I am nervous myself.😆 Or maybe for someone this guest will be a problem, considering that not every manager can come at night, and the main host is far away...

[Heidi588]

@Anna9170

"It seems like "something is wrong," but it may be my perception problem. That's what I want to understand. 

No, you didn't have a perception problem. Something was wrong in her situation...and then she was in your situation. What was wrong with her did not impact you, only that she brought it with her like her luggage, like more luggage than you expected her to have. 

You did well to pay attention to your gut response to red flags and check up on your property and on the situation. You took responsibility to guard yourself and your property. 

I think it would be worthy of a warning to hosts if her situation spilled over into yours, but she seems to have managed her boundaries well and not made her problems your own; if only everyone would do that in life! She may not bring the same problems with her if she has any future stays, it could easily be a one-off situation. If she was a good guest in all other ways, if I were her, I would hope that a review about me reflected that I was a good guest, since she appears to have made the effort to be one. 

I'm reminded of a studio apartment I lived in. The tenant subleased three beds and managed the situation remotely. A young woman applied and toured the studio. I really liked her, but she had just gotten out of living with her boyfriend who had perpetrated domestic violence. I didn't want her bringing that situation, him stalking her and showing up outside the building, etc. The tenant decided to rent to her, she ended up being a great roommate, and the guy never bothered her, so I was able to let down my sense of being on alert.

The sense of alert is important, but it is not the story about that person. If harm follows that person and also impacts you as the host because she would not or could not maintain a boundary to keep it separate from you and your property, that is the story.  

[Anna9170]

@Heidi588  Surprisingly, you took my words off the tongue 😘, psychological violence is the first thing I thought about when I met her. For many years of work at different objects, I saw different things, but when I saw this girl, I immediately thought that she was running away from someone, and someone was holding her on a leash. So I wanted to offer her help, although I always prefer the distance between me and my guests.😉

[Heidi588]

@Anna9170, I think you did help. 🙂  And the distance is wise. By not saying to her what you suspected, you allowed her to keep her privacy, her dignity, and her responsibility to manage her own problem. And you also demonstrated that you are alert, aware, and take responsbility to protect your own property. If she had bad boundaries, she would have been defensive, would have tried to get you involved in a drama, etc.

From all you've written here, I think you both handled the situation with great maturity, mutual respect, personal responsibility, and practice of excellent boundaries. From my personal preference of how I would like the world to be, I say well done to both of you! 

[Anna9170]

@Mike-And-Jane0  Ahaha, I think that silent mode in the phone is the basis of strong nerves ))). Thank you!

[Sarah977]

 I always turn my ringers off when I go to bed at night. I figure that if anything is that much of an emergency that someone wants to call or text me at 2 AM,  they should probably be calling 911 instead.

@Anna9170

[Anna9170]

@Sarah977  The nuance is that you live in the same space. And if your guest needs to call 911, you'll probably hear it without a phone call)).

[Sarah977]

I wasn't specifically referring to situations with Airbnb guests- it was just a flippant comment following your remark about silent mode being the basis of strong nerves. Sometimes I'll get spam calls at 7:30 AM, which is before my wake-up time. I started turning off my phone at night when an upholstery client texted me at 6:45 AM on a Saturday morning to ask if I could make him some curtains. Then he resent the text 6 more times between then and 8 AM. Talk about entitled to an immediate reply for a non-emergency, that took the prize. 

@Anna9170

[Anna9170]

@Sarah977  Forgive me, but I laugh in my voice and children look at me strangely. I want to sew the curtains at 6.45 on Saturday was my biggest need! 😎😁

[Sarah977]

Just so you don't think I've always been a morning slug, I did get up at 7AM for 27 years to make breakfast for my 3 daughters (there is 5 years difference in age between each of them, so I was parenting for that long) and get them off to school. Now they're all grown up I have the luxury of being a late riser like I was before I had kids. @Anna9170

[Anna9170]

@Sarah977  I have 4 children, and by the way, with a difference of 5 years between them. It does not matter who got up in the morning and made pancakes for them, for example))).
Your opinion is important and valuable regardless of this.