Host Is an UNMEDICATED bipolar woman

[Carol7337]

Here is the precursor to my question at the bottom of this post in order to provide context: 

I've been staying at a host's in Medicine Hat (Alberta, Canada) who told me at the start of my 30 day stay that she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and doesn't take ANY medication to control it.   

I know first hand about bipolar disorder because I grew up with an adoptive mother who herself was bipolar - It was awful. 

My stay with this woman here has also been awful as she has all the classic signs & behaviours of a bipolar woman including but not limited to:
Grandiose bragging & self importance, doesn't stop talking about herself & her opinions even when I asked her to stop, won't stop talking at all unless I go to my room, thinks she's right about everything, has a VERY HOT TEMPER, not interested in listening to others speak, easily irritated & agitated, abuses drugs & alcohol (daily & often).   

She smokes weed ALL DAY LONG and drinks alcohol daily.  ** Studies show as many as 60% of people with bipolar disorder abuse drugs & alcohol - Maggie (host) is one of them.  She needs to get proper treatment for her disorder and she isn't fit to be a host.
I didn't dare say any of this to Maggie while in her home because of her volatile temper. 

In the first 3 days of my stay, when this lady found out I'm a Christian, she said, "Christians are to blame for most the problems in the world"  and barked "God doesn't exist".    (I have never criticized her or said anything about her drug & alcohol abuse or her negative personality & hot temper)

I reported some things she said at the start of my stay and Airbnb offered to move me but moving is a lot of work b/c I'm travelling with everything I own in my car across Canada and have been using Airbnb for my stays .  I've had a couple very bad experiences with crazy hosts which meant I had to pack all my stuff and leave early from those places to get to a more sanitary home, or to get away from a dysfunction screaming husband & wife.  These moves & lugging heavy bags & luggage around is very hard on my spine (I have spinal stenosis).    I've gotten coupons for my trouble but the $ isn't worth the grief or the fact these hosts ruin my travel experience.   Don't get me wrong, I had some GOOD hosts too, but that's not what this thread is about. 

GOING FORWARD:  I asked Airbnb to wait until I've left this current host's to address her discrimination & hate speech against Christians because if Airb were to talk to her while I'm here, I'd be put in a position of having to deal with her bipolar fueled bad temper and heaven knows what else.

On Aug 4th when I asked her (again) to stop talking to me about religion & politics (she loves to rant about American politics), she told me to F**k Off!  
Then she criticizes my faith or Christian lifestyle but can't see her own issues.  When she says things like this to me I shut myself into my room again where I counsel women on my laptop (I counsel women who actually want to change). 

There's much more I could say about her behaviour and nasty remarks but for the sake of brevity I'll leave it at that. 

It's now getting close to the time for my stay here to end (thank heavens!) and I will move to a place in BC but am not using Airbnb because of these bad experiences.  I also have found another way to travel back East across Canada renting rooms which is much less expensive than Airbnb's astounding prices in which hosts are gouging guests and charging as much or more than hotels. 

All of that said, here is my Question = = WHY does  Airbnb allow people with non medicated mental illnesses to HOST?  ==  Doesn't Airbnb screen potential hosts before allowing them to operate through them?    

[Helen744]

@Carol7337 you said the host told you she had 'bi polar' ? but she did not tell you is that she 'medicated with both alchohol and other drugs . the situation you find yourself in is caused I suspect by overuse of both drugs and alchohol by your host not 'bi polar ' illness.Oddly enough , do you have mental illness ?  is not one of the questions a host must or even should answer.I suggest that you find other accommodation and 'dont worry about anything your host says', just get on out of there as quickly as possible. no one expects you to stay with an alchoholic host who makes you feel uncomfortable and abuses you . Ring airbnb and also check for other places to stay ,pronto. Good luck . H

[Carol7337]

Thanks for your response @Helen744  I think you didn't read my post in full.  I have a spinal condition and extra moving due to bad hosts causes me more pain.   And, as I wrote in the OP, my stay is almost over. 

I think that as a reader, it's a real jump to conclusions to say the host isn't actually bipolar when it was the host herself who told me after my arrival that she was diagnosed as bipolar (years ago) and refuses to take meds to treat it.   Also as stated above, studies show that up to 60% of bipolar disordered people abuse drugs & alcohol. 

I'll humour you for the record:  No I don't have any mental illnesses.  My biological family is of sound mind as am I.  However, if I did have such an illness, I would medicate it so other people were not being tortured at my expense. 

I asked one question which is at the end of the post and hasn't been answered.   

[Helen744]

@Carol7337, as I have noted , my writing is possibly badly punctuated and my meanings often misinterpreted.Please read what I have said again .I talk in different tenses , for reasons best known to my own brain as  like to add possible conversation . I am not writing a letter to you as such but commenting on the vague situation that you illustrated.my point was , that Airbnb will never ask a host about their personal mental health issues. I am sorry about your 'scoliosis' but if that is the case then really you should check out your hosts and where you are to stay very carefully. Have some consideration for yourself before setting off on your journeys . Why on earth are you travelling if you could be comfy at home ? I have known people with both bi polar and scoliosis and I know they are both variable conditions as to severity.My comment about alchohol and drug use was because these things often aggravate persons with bi polar , but possibly there use for scoliosis is more benign and possibly you are also using them . I do not know the point of this conversation . if you are uncomfortable personally ,aside from your normal discomfert , then you must get some assistance from both airbnband your local council to move ,now .do you have acess to a phone and other ways to get away . this sounds as if it is a much more dangerous situation for you than , you are willing to admit . The help you need might be at the end of a life line call . H

[Huma0]

@Carol7337 

You posted about this already and got a lot of responses and advice, so I am not sure why you have started another thread on the same subject. Perhaps you didn't like the responses you got last time which, as I remember, mostly suggested that Airbnb homestays were not for you, as in the previous thread, you mentioned having problems at several Airbnbs, not just this one.

I am not saying that your experience was okay or that your host's behaviour was okay. I wasn't there so I don't know what did or did not happen. However, what I don't understand is, if you contacted Airbnb to report this host for discrimination, why did you not ask them to cancel your stay and find somewhere else instead of completing your stay at this listing? You claim that hotels are the same price or cheaper, so I just don't get why you would continue to choose this place over cheaper options. 

Firstly, you could have asked the host to amend the dates of your stay if you did not want to cancel it. If she was unwilling to do so, you could have then asked Airbnb to cancel it for you penalty free if things were as bad as you say. 

And no, Airbnb do not screen potential hosts before allowing them to list. How would you suggest they do that? There are millions of hosts on Airbnb. Also, surely you are not suggesting that Airbnb ask people for their medical records, mental heath history and proof of what medications they are taking? I am sure you know that is impossible as it's confidential information and this would be considered unethical in many countries. 

The review and ratings process is there in theory to weed out bad hosts. If a host consistently gets poor ratings, they can be suspended or removed from the platform. Did you not check this host's reviews before you booked?

Sorry, I don't mean to be overly critical, but I'm not sure what you're hoping to achieve with this post.

[Carol7337]

I've noticed a lot of people on these forums are quite assuming.  I asked one question which is at the end of the post, but because the first sentence of your response to me was rude & assuming, I've not bothered to read past that first sentence. 

[Huma0]

@Carol7337 

Actually, I did read your entire post to the end, so at least I am basing my response on what you wrote, whereas you have not bothered to read past the first sentence of my response apparently (and I did answer your one 'simple' question, but you didn't bother to read it), but still feel equipped to respond to it. Mmm.

No, I didn't base my response solely on what you have posted above because you already created another post about the same thing and I read all or most of that in detail. So, naturally, I'm not going to pretend that was someone else and that I don't know about the other information you decided to omit here when you posted second time around having not liked the responses you got the first time.

I'm so sorry, but you're really demonstrating that you have a lack of sympathy, patience and understanding. If everything you say is true, then you have had a horrible experience. However, the more you post, the less it rings true. Perhaps everything you say is true, but you keep clouding it. Surely you have heard the story of the boy who cries wolf?

[Mika8]

Funny .. you assume that peple don't read through your posting .. in which you ask a question at the end. ... Then you find the answer rude, so you dont bother to read to the end of the post, which contains the answer of your question .. tjah

[Huma0]

@Carol7337 

Also, I do not know of any listings here that charge comparable prices to hotels, even once you factor in the Airbnb guest fees, so I am not sure that hosts are 'gouging' guests. Perhaps things are different in Canada but, in that case, why did you book airbnbs in the first place? I doubt that many guests would book them if they were so expensive compared to hotels...

[Carol7337]

As already stated, it's clear you didn't read my post in it's entirety.

It really does astound me that when I come here to ask 1 simple question and gave background as to 'why' I'm asking that question, how many people are eager to jump down my throat, make assumptions, accusations, and not hear the issue out. 

None of you would make good counselors, that's for certain!  haha! 

Have a wonderful day!  

[Huma0]

@Carol7337 

I did read your post in its entirety and I read the previous thread that you created about the subject. You are the one admitting here to responding without reading past the first sentence of someone's post! So who is the one making assumptions here?

And no, I am not a counsellor, nor do I pretend to be. Were you hoping for 'counselling' when you posted this thread?

Oh by the way, not sure you would make a great counsellor either. Aren't they supposed to listen? I'm pretty sure they are not supposed to say, "I didn't listen to what you said, because I assumed you were not agreeing with me. So, instead, I'm going to accuse you of not listening to me and making assumptions."

A bit of self reflection might be in order...

[Gillian166]

@Carol7337  what are you doing?
I've always found @Huma0  to be incredibly polite, but not so polite than she is pandering or supportive of bad actors, she's very fair and firm and has had a lot of experience with tricky guests and situations. There is something about the way you have written this long post that is a bit of red flag (and now I learn this is your second time here with the same complaint, another red flag).  

I'd also suggest that insulting hosts (we are not "gouging" guests!) is not a great way to get support, although I guess you don't know that this forum is mostly full of hosts, not guests. 

And finally to insult long standing members of this forum is also unwise. There are people here who offer a lot of wisdom, encouragement and excellent advice, and I don't always understand what @Helen744 is rambling about (sorry mate!), but she's a good egg and her heart is in the right place. When a newbie flounces in and proceeds to insult existing members you might find yourself on the wrong side of the line of tolerance.

You are kind of displaying a lot of the judgy, intolerant characteristics of some christians, which gives them all a bad rap. It is only God's place to judge, your job is to live honorably to be deserving of Him. 

[Mark116]

@Carol7337  How do you think Airbnb could possibly monitor whether any host has mental health issues or not, or whether those issues are treated or not or if treated whether or how succesful the treatment is or was?  Even putting aside the serious legal issues of medical confidentiality, if Airbnb were to try to get this information from hosts, how would Airbnb ever enforce or follow up?  How would you expect any company to monitor the health protocols of it's  partners?

As others told you home stays appear to be a poor match for you. 

[Carol7337]

I asked a simple question -- which was not asked in the previous thread -- and am once more receiving ignorant defensive retorts from hosts instead of a simple straight forward polite answer to a very straight forward question.

Thank you kindly for the entertainment 

[Mark116]

@Carol7337  I gave you an answer to your question.  Let me try again.  It is not reasonable, realistic or probably even legal for Airbnb to inquire about the mental health or medical treatment of hosts, and is impossible, even without these constraints, for Airbnb to ever monitor this.