Suddenly, girlfriend! (2 week 0-feedback asks if "someone can come over?)

[Kenneth12]

2 week booking,    college kid coming to visit girlfriend at UChicago over break.   Private room,  bookable for 1-3 people,  shared house.

With a thin profile,  gets the 10-questions from be after inquiry,  barely passes.

Upon check-in,  goes to wrong floor,  gets directed to correct floor.

Next day,    asks passively "what do I do if I want to have someone over?"

Gets reply about ABB Terms and that House Rules (which he was asked to read) says no unregistered guests,    -- etc.

Reveals his girlfriend would like to come over unspecified "sometime."

My reply is that if it's less than 5 times over 2 weeks for short periods that I know about,  even dinner,  no big deal;    any more and she needs to be on the reservation as an official guest and pay some kind of fee.

How would others handle?    It's a bit of a pain to need to potentially need to negotiate such a situation:  "Do you mean she may be staying overnight?  How many nights?   Well,  our extra guest fee is $15/night so ... "

[Anonymous]

@Kenneth12  I don't believe in ambiguous rules with loopholes and exceptions and potential for confusion. There's plenty of room for nuance when you have an established relationship with mutual trust, but you're dealing with a youngster who barely passed your exam. You could make it a lot easier on yourself by either saying flat out "no" or, if your room accommodates 2, insisting that he change the reservation to a flat-out 2-person booking and paying accordingly.

Once people know one of your rules is negotiable, I can guarantee you they won't take the rest of them seriously.

[Kelly149]

when the "tell me about your plans for your visit" seems to indicate local family or friends or something else that may turn into "hey, can xxxx come over?" I try to get in front of that by saying...

"ABB terms restrict entry only to the folks listed in your reservation, if you think you might want to be hosting others, then we'll need to adjust your guest count and rate well-before your arrival."

Being the first one to speak then positions them as the one who is asking to add on to their reservation rather than it looking like you trying to add fees.

and, yes, sometimes a flat out no is better than the if/then maybe scenario

[Kenneth12]

Suddenly,  she is not in college ... 

[Sarah977]

@Kenneth12  At this point, I'd sit the guy down, tell him that the time to have mentioned that he'd like his girlfriend to come over or spend the night was at the time of booking, rather than springing it on you after he arrived, and that now if he would like her to be able to come and go as she likes, that he needs to pay xx extra for the remainder of his reservation (not according to exactly how much time she spends there, but a set amount). You could hopefully do this in a non-confrontational, " Seeing as how you don't have much experience as a guest, you probably didn't realize this, but..." way and hopèfully it won't go sideways.

From your post, it sounds like he did mention when he booked that he was going to be visiting his girlfriend, so I wonder why you didn't ask him at that point if he was aware that unless he paid for a additional guest, he couldn't have her over. Maybe you were focused all his other cluelessness and thin profile and it didn't really register that he might try to pull this?

[Linda-And-Richard0]

@Kenneth12  We keep it simple, NO GUESTS or VISITORS that are not on the original reservation.  This is stated in our listing information.  Airbnb guests with family or friends in the area should make  arrangements to meet at the locals home or a restaurant.  I've had too many guests that wanted a local to come over "just to visit" and wound up spending the night.  My husband and I live right next door to our listing so we are aware of who enters the property.

[Sarah977]

I don't see anything wrong with guests asking if they can have visitors over, as opposed to assuming, as long as the host hasn't stated in the listing that this won't be allowed at all. There are hosts who are totally okay with this, as my friend who hosts a private suite in her home. She has an older couple who are repeat guests- they come every few months to visit their daughter and grandkids, but want their own private place to come home to and relax, rather than bunking down at the rellies' place. They are friends with another couple in town and like to sometimes invite them over for a game of cards and a drink. No way this other couple are going to spend the night, take showers there, etc, it's just a little social time. I also wouldn't mind if a guest asked if they could have a friend come visit for awhile in my shared-home listing. As long as they asked permission, had the manners to introduce the person to me, and it was just a visit, it's no skin off my nose. It's a matter of whether the guests are trying to take advantage or not, or misrepresenting the length of time their visitor would stay or the number of people they've invited.

But I can certainly see where hosts who have had guests take advantage in this way would have a strict policy.

[Helen3]

I agree what did you think was going to happen when your guest said he was booking to visit his girlfriend. It was clear that for whatever reason he wasn't able to stay with her, so he might want her to visit at yours. @Kenneth12 

Personally, I have no issue with guests inviting parents, partners, friends over to mine, during the day/early evening. No-one has ever disrespected or taken advantage of me and guests have only stayed for half an hour/an hour.

I agree if he wants her to stay over or stay during the day for longer periods she needs to go on the booking.