The master of situations has lost his mastery!

[Robin4]

I have always felt I was the voice of reason when it came to resolving difficult situations but, I currently have one I need some help with.

I have had a booking request (via the Stayz platform) for a single woman who wants to stay for 21 days. She loves gardens, she loves dogs, she loves a quiet location. Sounds perfect for me!

*

She has just lost her 19 year old son tragically, it has been a local news item, and she can’t face going home. She needs some time to straighten herself out. She said she will never celebrate Christmas again because Christmas represents an ultimate sadness to her!

From sheer compassion as a human being I want to open up my house and my heart to her and try to ease her pain, but a hosting on this basis has so many red flags, I can’t count them all.

How on earth should I handle this?  In a way I wish the request had not come, I don’t know her, I don’t even have an image of her, nothing to relate too but, I keep thinking about her and what she is going through all the time, as I luxuriate in the safety of having my girls just a phone call away.

I can’t say no, but I don’t want to say yes, I am looking to the community for help. Ade and I are going to the east  to spend three weeks with our girls so the opportunity is there to grant this request but, I am wondering what sort of a can of worms I will be opening here.

I really would appreciate any help you lovely guys can give!

Cheers......Rob

[Robin4]

@Lana15  @J-Renato0   @Helen350  @Kath9 @Anonymous  @Patricia55  @Lisa723  @Jennifer1421  

@Greg-And-Jutta0  @Danielle476  @Sarah977  @Suzanne302 

Thank you guys for giving your thoughts, I have chosen to not respond personally here but I have taken all  the comments on board.

I have made my decision...in no small part based on your feedback!

I have let her have the cottage in our absence. I have dropped my rate to $5 per night (which I can do on Stayz) on the provision she brush the dog every couple of days, take her for a walk each evening, water the garden each day, pick the vegetables and give whatever she doesn't want to the neighbours, go on with my latest mosaic creation and put her interpretation to it.....that will challenge her and I have told her I expect to see it completed when I return!

I have asked her to go over and feed the neighbours cat (Rufus) each day. That neighbour is currently in hospital with a blood infection which has spread to her artificial heart valve! 

I have given her all these instructions which she has jumped at. Next week we get together to thrash out the realities of the task in hand. She is to become our house sitter for three weeks! A dear friend of ours on the other side of Mt Barker is going to be available if anything should go wrong and I have suggested they might like to get together and lessen each others burden!

I feel a lot more comfortable now I have spoken to her and established that she just wants a sanctuary away from the reality of her passed life for a while. She wants a life away from her life!

The CC just keeps on teaching me how to to not only be a good host but a good person as well......thanks guys for that!

Cheers.......Rob

[Patricia55]

@Robin4Sounds like a damn' fine solution - good on you! 🙂

[Kath9]

@Robin4 sounds like a great outcome. May her stay in your beautiful home and garden with your gorgeous four-legged girl be a time of healing for her. This is what I love about Airbnb, the connections we make. Good on you for opening your heart and home to her. And yay for our CC family for helping make us all better human beings 🙂

[Lana15]

As always..you are an amazing person  . Instrumental to healing a  broken mother. 

We look forward to your post and update after her visit. 

A holistic therapy centre for $5 a night. 

Where in the world would you get that!

Lana

[Juan63]

I get your reluctance. First of all why would she disclose this information? To me that is very suspect and why 21 days? You want to believe people, doesn't mean you should. Why do others on this tread just simply believe. I would also consider her rating into my decision. If she has a few rating and a 5 star history that would help her case.

[Anonymous]

@Juan63  Since the fatal incident was reported in the local news, and public records are out there, I would think it's pretty safe to assume that it's not a hoax. 

[Juan63]

Sure but there is no way of knowing for sure they are the same person until after you accept. Nor did I say the actual story was a hoax.

[Helen350]

@Juan63 She would disclose this info. because Rob's bungalow is in his garden, not some impersonal unit somewhere, and good, responsible guests understand the need to be honest & upfront when sharing the host's property. Good guests understand the need for negotiation & a 'good fit'. I don't find the 21 days odd...  it's a round 3 weeks! Everyone has to plump for a decision re how long they wish to stay for, do they not? And Rob posted above that he intends to MEET WITH THE LADY before the stay, so if she is not who she says she is, I'm sure he & his wife will pick this up, & reconsider! 

[Mark116]

@Robin4   Hmmmm.  I would recommend that you have someone you know well come to the house and check on her and the dog after 2 or 3 at most days.  That's a lot of responsibility.  What if the dog senses her grief and acts differently because of it?  But, that's me, I am not keen on strangers taking care of people's pets, no matter what their life circumstances have.

[Robin4]

@Mark116 

Mark, a dear friend of ours we have known for 32 years lives about 2 kms from us and she is going to come over next week when the guest comes to learn the ropes! They will get on well because they are about the same age and both have experienced pain in their lives. Our friend will keep an eye on things and be available if she is required.

Betts the dog will be fine, she is used to a continual stream of strangers through the property and she has never so much as growled at a guest....she just loves everyone. I am utterly comfortable the dog will accept the situation in her stride! 

Mark I am active on a couple of other sites and on one of them I posted an answer detailing how I invited a past owner of this house and their family back in to visit and see what we had done with the property. That answer generated thousands of responses and those responses are really polarised.

Americans (in general) could not understand how I would take such a huge risk of opening my door and inviting total strangers into my property.....here in Australia we don't even think about it, friends or strangers, they are all welcome.

Just in case you may be interested here is that answer.....

https://www.quora.com/Have-you-ever-had-previous-or-original-owners-of-the-house-that-you-live-in-co...

Cheers.......Rob

[Stephanie]

What a dreadful yet wonderful story @Robin4 . 

I do hope everything works out for the bereaved mother, and do enjoy your trip with Ade. Keep us updated!

Thanks

Steph