"You Are Welcome Here" - The Unforeseen Surprises of Being an Air BnB Host

[Marianne235]

As I sat sharing a dinner with a new friend last night, one of my Air BnB guests, it occurred to me how far I had come on this journey when I opened up my home to visitors after losing my husband last year.

Over the past few months I have welcomed quite a few visitors. For some Santa Monica is the first stop, for some it is the last stop, and for some it is the only stop.  I’ve had visitors from France, Italy, Sweden, Ecuador, as well as other parts of the United States.  I’ve discovered August is the hot month for visitors from Australia!

When I first began this endeavor three months ago, I had no idea if I would enjoy it. The first couple of visits were indeed bumpy as I had to adjust to footsteps in the house (my house!), clunkings in the bathroom, and the door opening and closing at all hours. There was the discomfort of having to figure out how to live in my own house with strangers in it. Simple things such as cooking or watching television, or having friends over, felt awkward as I navigated boundaries between public and private space.

Then, as with so many things, I learned to adapt and even welcome these strangers into my home.

‘Welcome.’  That is indeed a beautiful word.  I looked it up and found that it meant, “Whose arrival is a cause of joy.  Received in gladness.”

Last night me and my new friend shared openly about loss and family and aging and how do we come back together as a country. Over the past months I’ve chatted with lady jockeys in the morning sunshine, had a glass of wine with a psychologist from Sweden, shared a meal with two sisters on their own journey of healing.

In the beginning, the gift of hosting the BnB was the requirement that I participate in the world to a greater degree. Opening my home up meant that I would be encouraged to meet and mingle with people after months of being a recluse.

It also required that I keep the house clean, do the dishes, vacuum the dust before it got too thick. It required I put a smile on my face, a cheer in my voice as I opened the door to welcome them in.

What had not been required was that we might share a meal, a story, a laugh, a loss. What had not been required was that we would hug goodbye, promise to stay in touch, offer open invitations to come visit and stay awhile.

I’ve known for a long time that this house, this home of mine, has a wonderful healing energy. She glows when she is filled with guests. The cool porch welcomes the weary traveler, the sunlit bedroom is a peaceful oasis after the tiring expeditions.  I hear it in their sighs of contentment when they first arrive, “Oh, how lovely.  Thank you for letting us stay.”

“The pleasure is mine.” I honestly respond.

There is something deeply satisfying in laying out the clean sheets, placing the towels just so, cutting the sprigs of lavender to greet them.  It brings out the mother in me to shop for fresh fruit, discover new books to add to the growing collection, make their coffee in the morning.  It pleases me tremendously to hear they’ve slept well, enjoyed their stay, miss this place already.

In a world that seems filled with violence and hate and cruelty, it is a blessing to be reminded that there is also much kindness and generosity and love. In the end we are all people. As I sit speaking with folks from different countries, different cultures, it is a fierce reminder that even as there are differences between us there are also so many similarities.  A mother is a mother in any country.  A loss is a heartbreak in any land.  A friend is a gift everywhere.

It is an honor to provide this sanctuary, this oasis, this place to ease down the walls for a little bit.

“Welcome,” I say to them as I open the door, letting them step inside.  “Welcome to my home.”

[Marianne235]

Would love to as well - who knows, maybe one day.  I love, love, love that quote.

Thank you.

[Alex939]

@Marianne235 you do miracles with your narrative gift, not to mention the ability to make people feel welcome. Very sorry for your loss, and please continue to inspire, our community needs this kind of energy!

[Marianne235]

Thank you so much for your words and wishes.  It has indeed been a journey.  The writing has been one way I have navigated these new waters.

[Andrea9]

@Marianne235 With all the controversy and negativity around Airbnb in the media this is a wonderful reminder of how this platform was originally meant:   help make some extra money covering one's bills. And then unintentionally it turns out to be a remedy to break loneliness or give purpose to those who seem to have lost it for a while. It's also a wonderful way to expand one's world by bringing it into one's home so to speak.

And true when hosting in one's home, managing that balance of living one's own life while giving guests the freedom of their own in it, is an incredible balancing act!

Wishing you lots more wonderful guests!

[Marianne235]

Yes - all of that.  As I look at the responses I'm getting from all around the world, I am looking forward to a time when i will feel adventurous once again and reach out to meet you.  Amsterdam is on my list.

[Robert-And-Nancy0]

@Marianne235

Your post brought me back to a time when I felt the same. Thank you so much for that. Hope that you continue to have the most wonderful guests and memorable experiences hosting.

[Marianne235]

Thank you for that.  As they say, no two stays are ever the same.

[Lizzie]

Hello @Marianne235,

Thank you so much for sharing your story here. It is so empowering to hear what you have experienced and achieved. As you can see from the responses you have received already, it means and resonates with so many of us. 

Thank you. 🙂

[Marianne235]

Thank you Lizzie, for helping me find a 'home' for my words as well.  As I mentioned above, writing has been one of the ways that I'm finding my way.

[Lizzie]

Aww anytime @Marianne235. We all find our own little ways of expressing our feelings and it is just really nice that you wanted to share yours with us here. 

[Fred13]

@Marianne235 Your story is full of gratefulness and joy, my journey has been no different; there must be a million similar Airbnb stories like this.

   Take some credit for your good fortune, since it is the result of having a 'beautiful mind'. 🙂

[Marianne235]

Thank you.  Finding gratitude and joy wherever we can.

[Tueykay0]

@Marianne235

Oh so SWEET!

I'm also in Santa Monica if you ever feel the need to meet for a cup tea 😉

[Marianne235]

That would be lovely!  I am discovering not only the guests, but the other hosts build this community.

[Bob-and-Kim0]

I LOVE your story!  Our story is not about the loss at the level that you have shared here, but our loss came about as the result of living in a city that is the fastest growing in the nation, and along with that has come fierce competition for employment, growing homelessness problems, skyrocketing rents, and unfortunately for me, age discrimination in my field, coming on the heels of breast cancer survival and 2 neck surgeries that knocked me to my knees, to say the least (and still struggle with).   Just as we bought our cute little farmhouse that we fought hard for and won,  I made a dumb career move, and left a position I was in for 8 years, to get rid of approx. 3 hour round trip commute in favor of a 20 minute one.  I took a contract position at Nike, just before a huge upheaval, and found myself without a job.  We had much to do to update this farmhouse, and now, no job.  So we thought long and hard, and decided to give short term hosting a try.  I had no idea what to expect, but I also THOROUGHLY enjoy helping people to feel 'at home' away from home.  I set about filling our farmhouse with the simple things that I loved growing up, when I would visit my great-grandparents farmhouse & grandparents homes in my summers, and I made a place that has the handiwork of 4 sets of grandparents on the walls & beds.  From the wedding ring quilt that my great great grandmother made from flour sack cloth, to the dress that my great grandmother made and the tatted bonnet & shoes in a picture frame.  Two china cabinets (one from my husbands grandmother, and the other from my great grandmother.).  We put goosedown mattresses on the beds and memory foam pillows.  Everything is washed in plant based fabric softener with lavender scent.  We always have fresh flowers on the table, and several kinds of coffee & tea available, lots of board games, a pellet stove, a huge 64" 4K TV, and comfortable furniture.  We just relish getting to meet new friends, sharing our hummingbirds, orchard fruit, and country setting, and directing them to the 15 wineries we have within 5 miles of our house, and the produce markets/farmer's markets, golf courses, waterfalls, day trips to the ocean, day trips to the mountains, or downtown Portland, Oregon.  

We LOVE being hosts.  I would LOVE to visit your place, and I would love to have you come visit ours, too!

Sincerely,

Kim [surname hidden]

https://www.airbnb.com/rooms/15816562?preview_for_ml

https://www.facebook.com/BandKFarmhouse/