Do you let guests receive mail?

[Huma0]

I have seen other threads on this subject, but dealing more with scams and fraudulent activity conducted by guests, e.g. regisering businesses, bank accounts, social security  etc. at the host's home. Of course, those are situations we all want to avoid (I have been the victim of a large identity fraud involving the postal service), but I want to talk about guests receiving mail in general.

Do you allow it? If not, how do you stop guests from doing it?

I have in my house rules (which I ask all guests to confirm they have read) that guest must NOT give out my address as a mailing address (but that long-term guests can ask permission first). I do understand that if someone is staying with me for months, they may need to receive some mail within reason, but I cannot allow short term guests ( I host around 150 people a year) to give out my home address.

Many companies will spam you forever regardless of how many times you return to sender. Only today, I got a letter addressed to a girl who stayed for two days in December 2016 and never asked permission to give out the address. When I emailed her asking her to get it removed from that mailing list, she first claimed that I had messaged the wrong person and then, when I confirmed her full name, that it still had nothing to do with her. How else did her full name + my full address get on the letter then?

I have had numerous guests receive mail at my house, often concert or football tickets, but also packages of varying descriptions. If they ask permission at all, they usually ask after placing the order, so they are not really asking, just letting me know so that I can be their concierge service! I have also had demands for payment sent by FedEx which the guest lied about and I had to sort out myself.

A current guest, who is staying a month, casually told me the first day that he would be getting his groceries delivered to the house. When I reminded him that he wasn't supposed to give out my address, he seemed shocked and asked what he was supposed to do about his Amazon orders. I reluctantly agreed he could order things from Amazon, but nowhere else (as Amazon don't tend to send spam mail). Since then, he's had numerous packages arrive from different companies. I can only imagine how many years I'll be receiving mail for him after he leaves. My other guest, who is staying six months, had six enormous boxes delivered after she arrived (I'm talking the size of suitcases). She did ask permission and said she would be sending them to China within one or two weeks. Two months later, I had to ask her to please have the boxes shipped back.

How can I stop this? I tell them no, but they do it anyway. I am thinking of adding to my rules: "Any unauthorised mail received will immediately be returned to sender or destroyed." Is that too harsh? And what if it still happens? It would be difficult to follow through on this without causing a big drama!

[Huma0]

@Susan151 

i think any address, whether billing, or just delivery, can be added to marketing databases, as can email address and phone numbers. I take great care to tick or untick the boxes so that I don’t authorise this but, despite this and the recent updates to data protection laws, sometimes my details still get added.

i had a guest who wanted to get a store loyalty card. They said they needed an address so she gave mine (without asking me). She said she asked if they would send mail and they had said no but, within the week, the first letter came. I asked her to tell them to remove my address. I don’t know if she did or not, but another letter came the following week. She eventually got them to remove my address but only because I made a big deal about it.

[Susan151]

@Huma0  I am feeling VERY lucky about now. So, can you send me your address so I can use it for loyalty programs and credit card applications? <evil grin>

[Huma0]

@Susan151 

LOL. Of course, I will PM it to you! Or better still, post it here so everyone can use it 🙂

Two more packages arrived for one of my guests yesterday and one just arrived for my other guest a few minutes ago... They seem to be on a shopping spree.

[Rebecca181]

@Huma0 , I have it easy, because I literally cannot have mail delivered to my house - we are outside of the town's boundaries - we are un an urban growth area. I do not even have a mail receptacle! I get my mail at a local shipping / UPS type store.

If it were me, I would not let anyone send mail to my home OR my current mail delivery location for the reasons some hosts have mentioned, above; too much liability if it is something illegal, or could affect my credit rating, etc. I wonder, do you have a local mail reception store that will accept a package from a traveler / guest, perhaps for a small fee? Something you might ask such a place, if you happen to have one near you. Over here in the US they are called 'UPS Stores' or similar. I know people who sail around the globe and it seems they are able to arrange having packages and mail delivered to them somewhere, hence my thinking of this possible solution. Let us know what you decide to do!

[Huma0]

@Rebecca181 

The Post Office offers a service like this. Unfortunately, my local branch closed down (since Royal Mail was privatised, they have closed many branches and replaced many employees with self service machines at the remaining branches). The nearest one is about a 15 minute walk away. Doesn't sound like much, right? However, most of my guests want everything on their doorstep.

There are also many private companies that offer such services. I don't know where the nearest ones are, but will look it up.

I have sent guests links in the past RE both the Post Office and other services when they have asked in advance to have something sent here. They never seem to use them though. They usually say that it takes too long (these are the very short-term guests).

If I know in advance that people want to send something, I will insist that they do not send it here and offer the above suggestions. The problem is that most of them 'ask' after they have already done the deed and the letter/parcel is on the way.

[Helen427]

@Huma0 @Rebecca181 @Susan151 @Ben551 @Kathie21 

I had a guest early in my hosting who asked if he could use my residential address for banking matters, in my shortsightedness I said "yes'" but not for anything else, alas Banks use customers details for Direct Marketing & i had several items arrive after he had left. I phomned the company concerned and asked that his information & my address be removed which they duly obliged in doing. Touch wood no more of his unsolicited mail.

On the flip side, I recently had a delighful Guest who had a family member want to do some envelope stuffing of letters whilst the guest was staying in my home so as to ensure that days postal collection. I didn't have an issue with that as that's a completely different story to your situation.

Thankfully most guest use email!

[Huma0]

@Helen427 

You'd think in this day and age that concert tickets and the like can be sent electronically and printed out if necessary. I have certainly received them this way and also printed them out for guests. However, it seems that certain companies don't allow you to do that, e.g. for football tickets.

RE banking matters, I would NEVER, EVER allow a guest to do this. You are lucky everything was fine, but my gut feeling would be that this could be a scam. A few months ago a prospective guest messaged me telling me he was setting up a new business and could he use my address to open a bank account. I said no straight away and contacted Airbnb.

They were very grateful I called them because it was absolutely a scam and this person had messaged thousands of hosts with the same question. I was the only one who had reported it!

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

@Huma0 

we allow our guests to receive email :)))

[Huma0]

@Branka-and-Silvia0 

LOL. If only there was some magic way their packages could be sent via email...

[Helen3]

Hi @Huma0 

In a city like London there is no reason with all the local drop off points that your guests can't get any goods they have an urgent need for delivered to them there. I have two pick up points within a five minute walk of me at local shops.

And  they can set up a PO Box for urgent mail.

I would suggest you have it in your house rules that you cannot accept parcels or mail due to security reasons.  Remind long term guests about this in a message.

Tell your current guest to have his deliveries sent to a local pick up point.

Any deliveries that turn up - refuse to accept them.

Any mail goes straight back in the post office box - not known at this addresss, return to sender.

Then if you have long term guests you feel you can trust you can agree a more flexible arrangement in person.

Quite honestly it is not your issue if they need to walk 15 minutes to a post office. I bet you will have pick up points for deliveries much closer than that.

[Huma0]

Hi @Helen3 

You are absolutely right. I will have a look into the nearest places that offer that service. I have sent packages from some but, again they were about a 15 walk away, which is bizarre seeing as we have so much else on our doorstep where I live. 

No, it's not my problem. It can just be difficult sometimes when you get that disbelieving and anguished look every time you say 'NO, sorry!'

[Wendy117]

An interesting discussion that i have never thought about in the years i have been hosting.  I have had a family who were emigrating to Australia and stayed for 4 weeks who asked  permission to receive mail and  got many letters from the bank, the education dept as they had to arrange schooling for their son, etc.  When i found mail for them in my letterbox i just put it on their porch. When they moved out i told them to get their mail redirected and i also had their new address and phone number.  There were a couple of letters that slipped through but i just left them in my letterbox and told them to come past and pick them up. They were apologetic and immediately phoned those companies to sort it out.  I dont know how they would have managed to get their new life in order if i had refused to receive their mail.  

I have also had other guests relocating to Sydney who stayed for a few weeks while they found somewhere permanent and they had parcels from Amazon delivered.  It was not an issue for me.

[Huma0]

@Wendy117 

I understand your point. I think that many live in hosts want to be helpful and want to be trusting, otherwise we would not be doing this in the first place! 

However, can you see how receiving the kind of official documents you are talking about could easily turn into a problem? Of course regulations vary from country to country, but a guest who gets themselves into debt (and it's not just scammers and criminals who get themselves into that position) can affect your credit rating, ability to get a new mortgage etc. or your taxes? What about when the bailiffs come knocking at, or kickng down, the door and seizing your possessions?

The guests I have hosted who have given out my address seemed like nice, trustworthy people and I'm sure the majority of them were. It never occured to them that it would be a problem (even though it is stated in the house rules, which they said they read, that they cannot do this). However, the very nice young lady who had the FedEx delivery was easily tempted NOT to pay for it, given that FedEx only had my address and not hers. 

You must remember these are strangers in your home. You do not know them, no matter how decent they seem to be. Is it worth taking the risk?

[Wendy117]

@Huma0   yes, which is why i found the topic interesting.  I am not sure whether an address is sufficient for bailiffs to call here in Australia but i will check on it.  Fortunately my home is paid for so re-mortgaging would not be an issue.   I do know i regularly get letters from Debt collectors and Motor Transport (for over 2 years now) for a person who has never stayed with me and obviously just gave a false address.  Even though i always return to sender marking it Not at this Address, they still arrive.  This topic has made me concerned over this so i will definitely investigate.

[Huma0]

@Wendy117 I have tried the return to sender over and over with very limited success. I don’t think it works a lot of the time. You would think that with something very official like a bank sending statements to a business account, they would pay attention but I still get those for someone who lived here ten years ago no matter how many times I tell them he doesn’t live here and had no right to register his business at my address in the first place!!

i wonder, how long have you lived at your home? Given that some companies will send mail forever (my mum still sometimes gets mail for me and I haven’t lived with her for 20 years, plus I still get phone calls and mail for the previous owner of my house eeven though I bought it ten years ago,), perhaps the person you refer to did live there once upon a time.