Guest left early

[Peyvand0]

I've just had a bit of a bewildering hosting experience.

I had an Instant Book from a Korean guest for two weeks. I must admit that this was a mistake  - I normally have IB set for those who have had a postive review and so used Airbnb before, but I think this accidentally got changed in my phone app. So she made an IB, no info , no message.  I sent her a message asking her to please tell me a bit about hereself, her plans and to make sure she has read all the description, rules etc and let me know if she has any questions.  Her English was barely there, and she asked questions that were clearly already answered in the info, so I already had a bad feeling as it was obvious she hadn't really understood much.

On arrival she was painfully shy but we tried to settle her in and demonstrate as much as we could all the key things she'd need to know around the flat. During the first week it was very hard to touch base with her as I'm pretty sure she actively avoided crossing paths (darting in and out of her room and shutting the door immediately as soon as we've gone into our room etc). From past experience I think it's a mix of it being a cultural thing and shy about interacting with us.  The tiny bit of conversation I managed to get with her she seemed happy enough but said she found London to be a bit of a culture shock.

She had left the front door open so knocked on the door one evening and had a polite word with her about it. She nodded and went back in. Then it happened again the next day! So I sent a message via Airbnb explaining that maybe she could translate the text and to please let me know if she doesn't understand or needs help. She replied saying she understood and it was better for her to see the message in text if we needed to talk to her. 

However, she then left the door open again another 4 times! My husband and I were at our wits end (what is there to not understand about closing the front door?) , we tried notes, diagrams, showing her . All the time doing our best to keep calm and polite but clear and firm as I didn't want everytime we spoke to her to be having a go about something .

So a week goes by and yesterday she left the front door open again! My husband spoke to her again showing her the door and stressed how important it is. I wasn't back until late so sent her a message asking her to at all times close the door behind her, stressed that it is a security issue and if it happens again we'll need to discuss what happens next at it puts everyone's belongings including hers at risk. She replied being very apologetic and she understood how important it was but thought she had been closing the door, and I finished with that it's a very easy issue to solve - she just needs check the door is fully closed behind her (it's not a tricky door), and I'll chat to her in the morning to check she's ok.

Then this morning whilst I was in the shower I heard her go out (actually closing the door this time), but came down to find she had checked out and left a note saying "I've gone to Paris, thank you!"

So I suppose it's done and dusted, but I am left feeling a bit bewildered. I'd hate to think she basically did a runner because she felt so uncomfortable with us.

 I'm also wondering how to leave a tactful review!

[Salvia0]

@Peyvand0. Oh dear! I think you honestly did everything possible to get this point across and I cringe envisioning to have such a special guest in your home for a couple of days and not only two nights. . Look forward to the nice ones to come! If you decide to leave a review wait until the last minute. Future hosts would appriciate a hint go take time and make effort to familarize her with the listing features. Maybe you are in the mood to make a last effort to explain how important the locking of the door is in the private section (maybe explain that this is only visible to her, not the public). Put the Korean translation of your note right into it too and hope that this serves her and possible future hosts for a better experience.

[Helga0]

@Peyvand0, what a strange experience. I had Korean and other Asian guests before and they are often very shy, the girls even more so, but usually grateful about a bit of smalltalk. Although you have to impose it on them, they will never start it. 

Leaving the door open must be a personal oddity , I never had that happen. My door is tricky, quite heavy for a tiny thin girl and you have to push it forcefully. I do a door opening and closing routine with every guest. 

For the review, I'd describe the rest as it was and, as @Salvia0 says, write about the door in the private part in Korean google translation. Or better still, write her now a mail via the message function, that you regret not to have seen her leaving, that you hope she did not misunderstand your insistance on the door closing, as it is so very important for safety reasons and you wish her well in Paris. Then add the Korean translation. 

Do your review a few days later, but not at the end of the 14 days. That gives you a chance that she calms down, knows you did not do a revenge review and she may leave you a good one. 

[Peyvand0]

Thank you.

I messaged her as soon as I saw she had left saying that I was sorry to have missed her, and hoped she had a good stay despite misunderstandings and wished her an enjoyable time in Paris. No reply though.

I've hosted Koreans before and definitely think there are some quite big cultural differences, and although they've tended to be very quiet we were still able to chat a bit to them and they had a better grasp of English so had understood everything from the start. I think she hated the whole thing the moment she arrived. And as a very petit girl at 4'11 myself, I do not accept this as an excuse for not being able to handle doors! And our door isn't heavy, and simple to close.

I left her a review today as tactfully as I could, I did mention the door issue as it's such a security risk and she left our door open for anyone to come in several times (luckily our area is relatively safe!).  

She's just left a review, in Korean. After running it through a few different translators the jist of it is definitely negative! From what I can gather, she had very high expectations and found our place to be poor and that Airbnb should have stricter standards and the price is too high (she was paying 20 quid a night plus fees) . She also insinuates that all our positive reviews are dubious and doubts that they were for this place (which they absolutely are and this has really irritated me) .

I also came across this:

https://kimchiicecream.wordpress.com/2010/03/20/cultural-taboos-and-native-english-teachers-in-south...

This makes sense a lot for previous young Korean guests I've had - particularly the apparent lack of "common" sense and being able to do things that others would think obvious. And in this case maybe the asserting of how important it is to close the bloody door was too confrontational/offensive for her so she legged it (although we ever raised our voices and by our usual standards were not direct enough!)

[Helga0]

@Peyvand0, thank you for sharing that link. It's a bit special as teachers are always a bit special. Or at least I never had such extreme reactions doing business there. I had a minor (on a fake passport) who was quite immature but not much different from some other teenagers. Nobody as obstinate as that. I'd think it is a personal characteristic. I hope it does not keep you from accepting other guests from Korea - and that the review does not scare them off. Did you leave a public reply? 

[Peyvand0]

This last guest was a teacher as it happens!

I have hosted guests from Korea before and there are deinitely common things that always come up that the article mentions- for instance things I wouldn't normally do like point out the bathroom is not a wet room so please keep the water inside the bath tub and use the shower curtain! 

But I agree that in this case she was an extreme. And admittedly a mistake due to an Instant Book setting being accidentally changed (I usually have it for people who already have reviews). I always ask guests wherever they're from to confirm they've read and understood everything in the listing. It was her first Airbnb and it was clear from the start the understanding was close to zero - she's not someone I would have accepted to book otherwise.

I did leave a reply (in English), basically saying that her experience of Airbnb from beginning to end was misunderstood and try as we might we couldn't please her. From the tiny bit I got out of her in conversation  I don't think she liked London in general.

There are other positive reviews from Korean guests amongst others so hopefully other future possibly Korean guests will see it's a one off, bad match and absolutely ludicrous to suggest that all our other postive reviews are not real!

My next guest is due on Thursday and also Korean, but I got to message him a bit before booking and he really does seem to "get it" as he referred to specific things in the listing so hopefully that will be much smoother, but I hope he doesn't see this most recent review and get nervous.

[Salvia0]

@Peyvand0 I would also like  to thank you for this article/link and sharing your story/issue in a style and quality which was often found in the old forums. And what I / We/the "old guard" miss so much! 

[Peyvand0]

Thanks Salvia, I've only just started looking at the new forums and am still trying to get my head round them. Definitely tends to have a different feel.

And thank you Cathy - My husband and I talked about it quite a bit after she left, and I really think we did our best considering. I mentioned the door in her review because you're right - it's a simple but serious security issue. As a host I would want to know that kind of thing. 

[Graham-And-Michelle0]

Wow that was a powerful read  and a great link .  We have had a few Koeran guests

and I wish I had read it earlier. Thanks so much for posting it.

Michelle

[Cathy10]

I would not worry so much about leaving a tactful review as a factual and accurate review. It sounds like your patience and hospitality went well above and beyond. If a guest is putting your security and peace of mind at risk I would suggest you have to warm other hosts an say the numerous efforts you made to get her to do this simple but essential thing.

[Dunstan0]

I had something similar last summer for a one night booking from 2 young asians...

Guests checked in including 'dog in a box' which turned out to be a tiny dog in a jewel studded carry bag.

Showed them around the boat and they went out to 'get some food'. Took the dog and their luggage with them which was a telltale sign but when I messaged them to check when they were coming back they said 'later on' each time but never showed up.

Maybe they thought it would be too impolite to say they didn't like the place.

It was pretty bizarre from my paradigm but I did everything I could at my end so didn't feel bad about keeping their money at all... It just meant the beds were ready for the next guests...

[Peyvand0]

Oh dear! What were they expecting - did they leave a review/try to cancel the booking?

"Dog in a box" has made me laugh - were you expecting a pet?!

I suppose at least they knew from arrival they weren't going to get on and made a choice!