Not nice guests! Fear of negative reviews from guests!

[John0]

Most of the time we receive amazing guests whose presence encourages us to continue hosting but now and then we receive guests who are just pain from the movement they enter your house or sometimes from the time they reserve your listing. If you speak to such guests about their behavior, they realize that they might receive a negative review and often those are the exactly guests who don't give you sincere reviews. My question, how to deal with such situations? 

[Deborah0]

@Maxine0

Yes, Maxine, the method you stated, of a host leaving a review that "John stayed here in October 2015" (insert name and date as appropriate) has been a host to host "secret code" which we have mentioned in the host community (New Hosts Forum, Anecdotes, Hosting 911 group, among others) and the regular members of these worldwide groups do know of and recommend this method.   I think it was either myself or Julie and Eric who first began to suggest this device to the host community, but we may have seen someone else use this "secret code" so I don't remember the exact origin of it.  Nevertheless, we have brought  up this type of review, (which essentially says nothing about the guest!) often as a means for hosts to clarify their ambivalence about certain guests, to each other.   I like the method for those instances where I feel that there was no behavior which clearly warranted a critical comment in their public review, but at the same time, I did not like the guest and felt there was something lacking in their consideration or respect.  

[Mathew0]

@Deborah0: I like this idea! Normally, if I get a guest I'm not terribly fond of but who hasn't done anything "wrong" per se, I just don't review them. But I think that this is a nice warning flare to other hosts. For me, I've been blessed to have really few terrible guests thus far, but there's a solid contingent of people whom it was simply unpleasant to host in some way that isn't polite to complain about in a review - for example, I had an incredibly dull/pompous husband and wife that bickered and nagged each other the entire stay (I reside in my listing), and felt the need to inform me of every single thing they were going to do. It's not like they broke something or made a mess, but it was unpleasant to have them regardless. 

[Graham-And-Michelle0]

Thanks for that brilliant suggestion.  Wish  we could just rate guests using the star method, then it would not be necessary. I will look out for such a system from now on when vetting potential guests and indeed incorporate it into our reviews also. Luckily not so many where it might be required.

[Mathew0]

@John0: One thing I've found helpful is that I confirm with them important details of the listing in the auto-message they get when they book. Something along the lines of "Just to be 100% sure, as it says in the description, the space available is an airbed in my livingroom. Is that what you want?" 99% of the time, they are able to understand, between the pictures and the listing, what's on offer, but I've had people book,read that, and then suddenly change to "not possible". This is also why I  require verified ID and a rec before instant booking- it weeds out newbies who think they've just stumbled upon some incredible per-diem apartment service.

[Thais-And-Miguel0]

Right Tuula!  What else can you do?  Like when the guest complains that the thread count of your sheets and towels isn't high enough?  "Thank you for coming.  We hope you enjoyed our countryside."  etc.

[Deborah0]

@John0 and @Helga0

My advice is that a host should never allow the fear of getting a negative review from the guest, keep you from confronting guests about their problematic behavior.  Simply put, you cannot allow yourself to be held hostage by those you have generously welcomed into your home.  I think it helps to just stop being afraid of getting any negative comment in a review or some rating that is not all 5 stars.    REalize that you will not always get all five star reviews.  I think Airbnb's Superhost program and the resultant tendency of hosts to be fixated on star ratings actually is not helpful.  

I advise hosts to just do the best you can,  as a small businessperson and host, and do that because you care, you care about your guests, you care about their enjoyment, you care about your home, you care about your own contentment and comfort, and you care about keeping everyone happy -- including yourself.  I dont' think we as hosts need star ratings or Superhost badges to sincerely care about these things, and I actually think the star ratings system causes more stress, worry, anxiety and anger in hosts than it is worth.  THe beauty of written reviews, is that the reader can understand the context involved from what they read, and they can often glean from the review, whether they think it is truthful or exaggerated, whether it is understated or overstated, whether the writer is kind or callous, tending to forgive or tending to go through life looking for problems.  

You mention that you are concerned with guests who dont 'give sincere reviews.  I think that insincere reviews can actually be detected, in many cases.  And certainly since you are able to respond to reviews, a reader of both sides of the story will have your contribution to weigh, and the more effectively and professionally you can communicate in a response, the more likely that YOU will be believed,  rather than an insincere guest being believed,  in any fabrications they may incorporate into a review which may be more vindictive than truthful.  The issue of negative reviews has come up many times on the host forums, and what I have seen is that hosts actually can make themselves look GREAT and very professional (it can be an advertisement for how very professional you are) when you respond kindly and professionally, neutrally and concisely to a guest's negative and snarkey review.  You just end up looking so much better than they do.  (By contrast, hosts who fall into the temptation to write lengthy rebuttals to guests' reviews, addressing every single point in excruciating detail, and coming across as annoyed and contemptuous, do no service to themselves.  )

I think the review system is actually quite good.  Reviews can convey so many nuances, so much information "between the lines", and thus are transparent and open in a way that the star ratings are not.  STar ratings are opaque rather than transparent, and not only does the observer not know which guest gave which star rating, but no explanation for the star ratings need be given by the guest.  So I think hosts dont' really have to worry about bad reviews, ( but it's my hope that the star ratings system is overhauled.)...

I also find that having good communication skills can be very beneficial in any difficult situation with guests.  Good communication means that from the start you clearly commmunicate what you are offering to the guest, and what you are not offering.    WHy for instance are many guests arriving thinking they are renting an apartment, when you are offering a room?    If this is happening often, it may be good for you to write your listing description to more clearly emphasize what you offer, and in initial communications with guests, to make sure every guest knows in advance what type of rental they are getting.  

Good communication  means that you focus on the facts, and communicate about facts, and avoid making assumptions.  Good communication is actually quite an art, and not easy to attain.  It's something we continually work towards.  Being able to communicate skillfully, means that when you have to confront the guest about something that they are doing that isn't allowed, or some problem they are creating, you can do so cleanly, by focusing solely on the problem involved,  and this can make it easier for them to respond than if they had been addressed about the issue in a shaming, unprofessional way.  Of course, there is nothing that we as hosts can do if the guest has a psychological tendency to respond badly to correction or to authority figures, to react very defensively.  We can only do the best we can do.

I find that it helps to confront a guest sooner rather than later when there is a problem.  Waiting to confront them often means we just get more angry, and then when we're more angry, it's not going to come out so well when we have that difficult conversation.   So, to try to resolve things more easily, talk to the guest as soon as you are aware of a problem.  

 "Right now I'm only annoyed....but later I'll be livid....!" 

[Peter0]

I just had some slightly gauche guests - terrible communication, didn't turn up as planned, etc.  They felt a bit off but I treated them well.  When I got back there was a mountain of dirty crockery and glassware to be washed.  I know we provide a cleaning service of course but I think on Airbnb you should be expected to wash up after using the host's kitchen.  I think these people felt it was so much like a hotel they could just leave it all for the staff to deal with.  So maybe it is a compliment.  Still, I marked them right down for cleanliness and said that homesharing culture is to leave the home as you find it.  

What on earth happens to our reviews of guests?  We don't find out about potential guests what their reviews were for cleanliness at their last place do we?!

[Deb0]

@Peter I used to have the same issue with dirty dishes. So rude! Now I have a note above my sink "thank you for cleaning your dishes". Problem solved.

In fact I have similar notes all around the house regarding heating, windows, skylights, TV etc. they seem to be much more effective than my house manual.