Support for Hosts with Bloody Sheets

[Sarah-and-Alex0]

This is for hosts who have had guests bleed on (or ejaculate on, or whatever) their linens.  We've had this problem, and handle it in a straightforward way.  More on that below, including sample text (NB: You need to have a security deposit in place, and handle it the day of incident or checkout).   However, since we seem to feel differently about this than other hosts do, we wanted to share our thoughts and possibly encourage new hosts with the same problem.  

Someone else's period (or nosebleed, or shart, or ejaculation) is NOT your problem.  Practically speaking, a guest may refuse to be responsible for her or himself, and may rob you of your time or money (kind've making it your problem).  However, you do not need to feel like you're being unreasonable because you don't want to scrub someone else's fluids out of your linens.  If you're a female host, you can reject your bloody guest's request for solidarity and still be a feminist - she's stealing from you, and telling you to be OK with it because of your gender; that's not gender progress.  If you're a male host, you probably haven't heard this one - and you don't need to excuse this type of damage where you wouldn't excuse skid marks.  Period blood isn't morally dirty and taboo, it's just a bodily fluid that stains, so you don't need to feel awkward asking your guest to reimburse you.  A gendered argument for the host just accepting these costs, where other types of damage are more readily reimbursed, is totally retrogressive. 

So basically, just because a very small minority of guests who cause stains (a small number already) steal your time or money by refusing to be responsible for themselves, doesn't mean you're crazy for not wanting to scrub out their stains.  If you're willing to do it, by all means, but the first time this happened, we called Airbnb Superhost Support to ask for advice, and they seemed **horrified** by the idea that we would do anything but burn blood-stained sheets.  

TLDR:  Don't treat women and men differently - have a security deposit, demonstrate clear boundaries, and ask guests to honor them. 

HOW TO REVIEW THE BLEEDER:  With great civility and honesty.  

If the damage is reimbursed graciously, "We had a small issue with a stain, but Lady Guest was completely gracious about reimbursing us for the cost.  Since we understand that these things happen, and given how politely she handled the whole thing, we'd certainly recommend her to other hosts."  

If the guest refuses, "While Grotesque Bleeding Guest seemed like a cool person, I cannot recommend that other Hosts welcome her into their homes.  She refused to reimburse us for the sheets that she ruined, after agreeing at the time of booking to approve documented charges for damage to our security deposit.  This is a great breach of the trust we have in the Airbnb community, so we hope other Hosts will be able to avoid the same problems that we had with Grotesque Guest."

NOTE:  Airbnb's algorithms seem to give us more InstantBookings when we give fewer guests the dreaded Thumbs Down, so we started reserving the thumbs down for the most truly egregious guests and save most feedback for the comments. 

STEPS FOR MAKING THIS EASIER IN THE FUTURE (again, you need to have a security deposit on your listing before the guest books)

1.  We always include a note in our welcome message that if linens are stained, they'll be charged against the security deposit.  

2.  We send the guest a message telling her/him:

"Hi, thanks again for staying with us!  It looks like there are some stains on the sheets, and for everyone's health and safety, stained sheets need to be disposed of.  Luckily, Airbnb's security deposit system makes it easy to add the replacement cost to your booking after we provide documentation.  We've had this happen a few times, and guests are always gracious in handling it.  If you'll approve the security deposit charges when we submit them, we'll be all set.  Thanks again, and all the best!"

3.  Photograph stains (including tag if possible/relevant - our sheets are Ralph Lauren, so that tag makes a difference)  🙂

4.  Submit a security deposit claim ("Request Damages" or "Resolve an Issue" button I think) including photos, a polite note, and a link to the replacement cost online or a photo of the receipt.

Airbnb does not make it very clear, but guests do not appear to be compelled to approve the charges.  We once had a guest refuse to pay for the sheets, and we ended up making a claim to Airbnb, which paid us 80% of the cost, and then we experienced a serious drop in bookings for that listing (only for the one of 2 identical listings for which we submitted the claim to Airbnb).  We do NOT recommend submitting this type of claim, just in case Airbnb is penalizing hosts who pursue claims for damages that the guests refuse to pay.  

[Sarah-and-Alex0]

A thought on what you said about embarrassing the guest - I know a lot of people see bodily functions as shameful, which is a pity.  Several guests have seemed embarrassed, not about period blood, which is a perfectly normal part of being a woman, but about having left our place in a way they felt bad about.  While I don't want anyway to feel bad, I think it's a sign that we all know it's wrong to simply expect someone else, or the community as a whole, to take responsibility for the costs we cause.  Like I've said, we rarely have an issue with stains, and most of those few times, the guests have been gracious about replacing our sheets.  My original post was intended to provide support for hosts who feel differently than you do, so I'm glad we've been able to have this exchange and let other hosts see that there can happily exist a diversity of opinions on how to be a great Airbnb host!

[Dee9]

Okay DOUBLE WOW as I just read you charge for the whole sheet set!

Why dont you just increase the price of your listing by a little since this seems to be your area of paranoia it might be well worth it. Rather than embarrassing the guest. I cant even imagine getting an email from someone saying you got your period on my sheets now please replace the whole set. Geesh.

[Sarah-and-Alex0]

Hi Diane, while I'm sure your tone is meant simply to imply surprise, we do usually try to take as gracious a tone as possible in our communications on AirBnb - I'm sure this is a big part of why most guests who leave stains immediately accept the replacement cost charges from the security deposit, usually with apologies for the inconvenience. 

My earlier note about AirBnb's guidance on this issue may have gotten shifted onto the 2nd page, so for everyone's benefit, I'll share it again:

*** When we called into AirBnb's Superhost Support seeking advice on how to handle the issue of blood on sheets, they told us that handling bodily fluids was a health hazard, and that we should throw the sheets away,  not attempt to get the stains out. *** 

They also told us it was up to us whether to charge the guest's security deposit.  We understand that some hosts see this as a cost of doing business, but our feeling is that it's unfair to the majority of guests, who leave no stains or other additional work or cost outside of regular cleaning and laundry, to charge everyone higher prices instead of asking guests who leave stains to be responsible for them. 

Other hosts may also find it helpful to define clear expectations for their guests.  Since part of what we all love about AirBnb is that each host can have a different style, we feel it's important to communicate clearly to guests, ahead of time, that we charge to replace stained sheets (obviously we don't want anyone to feel hoodwinked). 

As I've mentioned, I'm sure other hosts handle certain things differently than we do.  The high quality of our amenities, including linens, is one of the things that allows us to get great reviews.  I'm sure many hosts and guests are perfectly happy with mismatching sheet sets, and if we're able to replace just the fitted sheet, then that's all we charge the guest.  It strikes us as odd, however, that if we're left entirely without a matching set of sheets, we would only charge for part of the replacement.  But like I said, I'm sure there are folks who do things differently!

[Dee9]

It's sad that you refer to "guests who show less care" when they simply had an accident. I show a lot of care to my own sheets at that time of the month and still accidents happen. That you feel compelled to give a bad review over what you yourself call a normal bodily function is very sad in my opinion. 

Since you don't seem to have a problem humiliating your guests why don't you just ask them on arrival "do you have your period this week? Because I'd like to use cheaper sheets". 

Problem solved - in my opinion.  

Lastly I'm not sure if you were referring to me when you said "Dee" but my name is Diane. Unless there is a Dee on this post then my error. 

[Sarah-and-Alex0]

Hi Diane (my earlier reply was to someone named Dee  :)), some people use accident to mean "a problem I caused but don't want to pay for" - we just let guests know ahead of time that if they have accidents, we will ask them to pay for them.  The sample text in my post shows that we often leave 5 star reviews for guests who have bled on the sheets and graciously accepted the replacement cost - we're in a pretty niche area here, I know, but I'm really just offering guidance to other hosts on how to avoid being victimized by guests who are unwilling to pay for the cost of their accidents (and are maybe feeling discouraged by other hosts telling them to just shut up and get to scrubbing that blood (or ejaculate, or excrement!)). 

To reassure any terrified new hosts reading this, while a lot of women who stay with us have their period (which we know because we empty the trash), most leave no additional mess for us to clean!  We're really discussing a minority within a minority, which thankfully is very small!  🙂

[Dee33]

I find this discussion astonishing and just cringeworthy. I would never embarass a guest like that. "Accidents" happen and sometimes no matter what a woman does, it can't be helped. 

I would say perhaps a better approach is to make sure your bathroom is well stocked with emergency period supplies, and perhaps those disposable bed pads if you are obsessive, to prevent the problem in the first place.

But as for the sheets, you don't need to scrub ANYTHING. Just throw the sheets in cold water and let them soak to remove the stain. Problem solved. My goodness, do you charge them to clean the toilet too? This is one of those comes-with-the-territory issues, IMO. Maybe up your laundry game instead. Never wash in hot water - ever - it sets the stain. Cold water first til stain is gone, then your normal warm or hot cycle is okay.

[Sarah-and-Alex0]

Good advice on the bathroom signs, thanks!  As you obviously know, clear communication ahead of time can save lots of time and money. 

I do admit to some surprise at how angry a couple of hosts seem to be that we handle this issue differently that they do.  We provide larger and more nicely appointed spaces than are common in our area, at a competitive price, and we have fantastic reviews, so it appears that what we do works for a lot of guests - part of the reason we're able to provide such a great experience is because we don't charge every guests an inflated daily rate to cover the rare instances of damage.  When I came to the forums looking for guidance and found mostly opinions like yours, I decided to write this post in case there were hosts similar to us looking for reassurance that Airbnb is a place where they can set their own hosting standards. 

I find cringeworthy the idea that someone would leave a bigger mess in someone's home than is typical, and that a couple of the hosts here would use such a rude tone of "voice" in a public forum devoted to encouraging greater transparency and a diversity of ideas.  That being said, I guess we all have different styles!  Happy hosting  🙂 

[Dee33]

Angry? No. Incredulous at lack of laundry skills and condescending tone towards guests. You do you, but if I put myself in guest's position, I'd never return to stay with such a host again. 

[Monica1501]

The biggest issue for us is period blood and ejaculate in our very expensive sheets. This is obviously not an accident issue. I agree with you. 

[Diane77]

I am grateful for all your advice here. But three times in a year we have had guests bundle their bloody sheets and mattress cover into a ball, and so I dont know about the blood stains until after a hot wash. Then  I cannot get the stains out and the sheets and mattress cover are unsuable. This leaves a loss of about €50, which is one and a half nights booking. The amount of period blood can be astonishing and it can go through a waterproof cover onto the mattress underneath. I have just paid €500 for a new mattress due to the few ignorant guests not telling me. I have so far absorbed the costs, but it is becoming a serious problem. I would hate for the new mattress to get stained. Our last guest, left yesterday and never said anything on departure and she was a doctor. We had a friendly exchange for the whole of their visit, so this situation has surprised me.

[Jennifer1191]

Hi Diane - I completely agree. We host in Mexico and have to import decent quality linens ourselves from Canada when we visit our property. We just had a family leave and discovered urine and orange food (?) stains on top quality linens on the master bed that cannot be replaced until our next trip down there. This is above and beyond normal wear and tear of the cost of doing business. Also, I was raised to not eat, drink, bleed, or pee in bed AND soak stains immediately when they happen. What the angry hosts in this thread seem to be missing is that excessive staining is not only bad behaviour it is unsanitary and costs all guests. Either we have to raise costs, lower the standard of linens we provide, or stop welcoming families with children if the behaviour can't be stopped or compensated for.

[Liz538]

Yes the amount of period blood CAN be astonishing. Even to a female who experiences a period every month. Periods can be irregular. Heavier or lighter each time. How dare you lump these situation in with carelessness.

Ignorant guests’ not telling you about probably the most mortifying experience they’ve ever had? Wow.  Hope I never run across any of your bookings.  

Maybe try leaving accident or emergency instructions for these situations so guests have some sort of guideline they can follow to maintain their dignity. 

[Sarah977]

@Liz538  Yes, of course it's embarrassing. But responsible adults don't just bunch up or leave sheets they've bled on and not say anything. Considering that 50% of the adult population has monthly periods, it's not something that needs to be mortifying. I should hope any adult woman would know that blood left to dry will be almost impossible to remove, and have the respect to contact the host to ask how they would like it to be dealt with. I've had female guests who were just open and straightforward about it- "Sorry, had a bit of a "monthly" accident on the sheets, do you want me to soak them in a pail of cold water so the stain doesn't set?"

How hard is that?

I'd be mortified if I accidentally backed into someone's car in a parking lot, causing extensive damage. Does that mean I should just drive away as fast as I can and hope that no one saw what happened so I won't have to take responsibility?

[Zappa0]

Accidents? What about couples that decided to move forward despite some monthly issues? 

[Monica1501]

That’s most of the issues we have! As an adult woman, I can tell period blood from moving ahead and having sex while on your period! The couple that left today, neatly covered up the sheets with our $1000 comforters only for me to discover 3 large spots  in different locations of the bed where they changed positions and then just covered the sheets and checked out. I am truly sick of this! Why not use a towel and place it under your butt? I’ve done it myself.