how detailed should house rules be

[Theresa7]

How detailed  should house rules be and how do you enforce them without creating tension and conflict?  I'm a new host my first two guests were great and I did not have house rules. My current guest is difficult and has made me feel the need to establish some house rules mainly because she accused me of being nitpicky and said that I should have had my nitpicky rules on my listing. This came about because even though I had given her a shelf and 2 draws in the kitchen she began stacking her stuff ontop of my stuff on my shelves, ofcourse I asked  her not to.   A couple days later I asked her to ease up on the air freshener, she was satuating my home on a daily basis. It was then that she went on a tirade calling me nitpicky and insisting that she was a tenant and had rights. I held my ground in that conversation but I'm now reluctant  to say anything about her hourding my towels in her room(I'm allowed 2)or even something  as simple  as they don't recycle yogurt containers here please put them in the trash. Honestly I usually  just wash my towel  and put it back on the hook anyway it seems easier to just deal with it than create more conflict and tension.

But when it comes to rules do I really  need to think of and list every posability;

please return towels to bathroom

pleese keep your things on your shelves only

please clean it up if you boil over a pan on the stove

please recycle only these items.....

please use the toaster oven not the oven for 1 English muffin everyday

and on and on

I mean come on these are adults right and it actually seems like it would  be insulting to most people with manners to make such a list.

I looked at some other hosts rules and they were pretty short the one I liked best simply said "I expect my guests to be very respectful"

 Finnally do I need to say no smoking or is that just a given with airbnb.

[Eileen4]

I was looking for a place in a big Canadian city and came upon one listing that had very, very detailed rules and lots of them. I probably shouldn't complain here as it's not nice to knock other hosts, but there were two bedrooms in this condo and she was obviously renting each out separately, so as a single woman going in, I could have ended up in a bad situation, because who knows who else is going to show up? She said that if there was a problem getting along with the other guest, to email her, like that was a real solution. 

The rules were so long and so onerous, I just gave up reading and thought, 'Christ, why don't you just rent it out whole and stop trying to micromanage from overseas' (she says she's not living in Canada at the moment).

All this to say, keep the rules to a minimum, but since it's clear you are in the place itself, maybe take photographs of things like the shelf space and say in the caption that "this is what you'll be getting." As in, lay out the physical space, mention the limits of sharing and hopefully, only those who get it will book with you. Other than that, you should really read potential guests' reviews closely, just to save yourself the wear and tear on your nerves. 

[Clare0]

@Theresa7 I think @Eileen4 has given you some very good advice.  You don't want your House Rules to be so excruciatingly detailed that it's a total turn-off to prospective guests.  Just list the major points of what guests are allowed and not allowed to do. 

Seems to me you were the victim of a bad guest, not because you don't have adequate house rules.  By the way, I would edit the part about your leaving stuff around but that you clean up when a guest is there....guests don't need to know that!  TMI!

Perhaps you need to vet guests more carefully and until you develop some spider senses about people maybe only accept guests with prior positive reviews.  As to this particular guest who thought you were nit-picky, sounds to me that this was a pretty self-entitled individual.  Your review of her should say something to the effect that she had difficulty respecting your space. 

One last piece of advice: for privacy and security reasons delete the exterior photo (#6)

of your listing as it shows your house number.  I just responded to a post here in the Community from a host that had someone show up at her door without a reservation!  You don't want that!

Good Luck!

[Theresa7]

Thanks for the advice. You are absolutely right about the vetting.  I actually had misgivings about her from the begining. She had written a reply to a review that made it pretty obvious that she had conflict with her last host. But I thought be nice give her a chance, the correct thought should have been take care of yourself, protect yourself, after all I'm letting stangers into my home. LESSON  LEARNED! But now I'm stuck with her for a few more weeks. I will probably also change my settings to a 3 week maximum. I see your point about the TMI I was just trying to sound human because  I really dont like being the kind of person that has a whole bunch of rules.

[Clare0]

@Theresa7 Well, your spider senses were working, you just didn't heed them...happens to the best of us. Keep in mind that when hosts write a review, it's mainly to inform the next host what it was like to have this guest in your home. It's really not for the benefit of the guest.

And, yes, limiting your maximum stay is really a good idea, especially being in California as I am.  California law gives renters tenancy rights afte 30 days.  What a nightmare if you have to evict this person if she doesn't want to leave! If you haven't done so already, you should read this Airbnb help article about Long Term Stays: 

https://www.airbnb.com/help/article/805/what-are-some-things-i-should-consider-before-hosting-long-t...

What about my suggestion on your exterior photo?  Seriously, it doesn't add information to potential guests and it shouts "come find me" possibly to unwanted strangers.

Have fun hosting...I wish you well. 

[Theresa7]

of course I think you're right about the photo. I'll change it.

thanks again for your help

[Brittany1]

I think it's good to not be too nitpicky but I would recommend if there are very specific rules that will always exist in your home, make a home rules sheet that you keep in the house.

We occasionally add a rule to prevent future mayhem. Like the time a guest left sweating water glasses on our vintage dresser through out her stay then told us we should have a had a rule telling her to use a coaster. Now we have "always use a coaster" in our rules. (Also, have a security deposit). In this case we were able to get our entire security deposit to pay for the damaged dresser.