Do Not Break Your Own Rules

[Farah1]

Do not break your own rules unless you are ready for the consequences. I see a pattern/similarities in many posts here regarding difficult guests/guests who break house rules. Yes, they do exist. From about 4 years of hosting, I have met many different kind of people/guests, including the difficult one. However, there are people who are just difficult, and there are people who are being difficult because they see the opportunity for them to do that.

One of the common issue that I see in the forum with difficult guest started with "reservation for 2 (and your listing is only for 2 people), but 4 people show up. I feel bad/it was late at night, so I let them stay" or "they asked if their friend can come visit (even though your rules say that no visitor is allowed), I feel bad/I am afraid of bad review, so I let them do that" then instead of 1 friend, there are 4/5/6 friends show up. That is what I meant by breaking your own rules. If the listing say 2, then do not take more than 2. If the listing say no visitor, then do not take any visitor. UNLESS you are ready for any consequences it causes. When you break your own rules, it makes it look like you are not taking it seriously/honoring it. Then guests might think, why should they? They get away with "breaking" one (per your permission), so they might wonder what else they can get away with. Do not put yourself in that situation, it is like a snowball that will get bigger and bigger... yes, there are people who do not understand boundaries and will push you to your limit. When you break your own rules, it will be harder to enforce the rules because you (the one who makes the rules) break it too.

[Andrea9]

Exactly @Farah1, good analogy.

[Jessica-and-Henry0]

@Farah1

Great posting. I've managed to stick to my rules..... and anytime a guest or potential guest asks for something "extra", my response is along the lines of "Nope. Not happening. Please read my house rules." 

[Zoe34]

Great post, @Farah1, and this also goes back to "bending over backwards" for a guest.  When you break your own rules to get a booking, or to make a guest happy, it's likely just going to be a pain in the rear guest that will ask to change things the entire time they stay with you.  Stick to your guns on what you have in your listing!  Thanks for posting.  I need this reminder a lot.

[Farah1]

@Zoe34 many times the purpose is to make guests happy, but apparently the extra things we do sometimes still don't make them happy and it will end up being a giant pain as you mentioned. The last time I did this was when a guest lost the key to the front door. He was not sure where it was, etc. Per my house rules, if guests lost key then they will forfeit their security deposit ($150) because I want to replace the lock and not only make copies of more keys (I do not like the idea not knowing where the key is). However, they were young couple and after having a discussion with my husband, we decided to help them. Big mistake. Helping them = putting myself in misery. I understand how important $ is when you are traveling especially when I was their age, so we thought that we can make an exception this time. They drove to Lowes and got a new lock, but it did not work. That was their last night, so the next day after they check-out, I needed to put the old lock back, bring the new lock to Lowes to get a replacement. The replacement did not work with our August smart lock. That day, I spent most of my day going back and forth to Lowes and Home depot for at least 5 times! and changing the lock (doorknob and deadbolt) for so many times. Not only I was spending money for the gas, but also time and energy. That was a real reminder for me that I should just stick to my house rules. Yes it would be unfortunate for them if they get charged the security deposit, but it was them who lost the key. I need to be responsible for my mistakes, so why do I need to be responsible for other people's mistakes/bad luck. Since then, when guest wants extra or breaking house rules, I take a deep breath and send a message/reminder regarding the request or the issue per the listing/rules that they have agreed to when they make the reservation.

[Malachy2]

It seems very expensive to charge somebody 150 dollars for a lost key.

[Karen-and-Brian0]

Hi @Malachy2 I'm assuming that was directed at me? 🙂 Well, for safety reasons, we have the kind of keys that can't be duplicated & they are more expensive - but the majority of expense is having the locksmith come out to our cabin from the city. The $150 is what we would have to pay if someone lost a key. I've found putting that cost in there to be a wonderful deterrent - no one's lost a key yet! - Karen

[Ziggy2]

It's not. In Germany, commissioning a locksmith to replace a door lock (because of lost key or whatever) this one charges you 180€ at the least! Just for your information.

[Alice-and-Jeff0]

@Farah1 - I actually just did this, well, sort of.... bride wants to have her bridesmaids get ready at my home because it's closest to the venue.  So I reminded her (first, no third-party bookings which this was) and we don't allow visitors or parties.  And yet I said, if she wanted to have a catered event with access to more of the home, we'd be happy to host her "party" for a price.  A few hours later I asked myself "WTH are you thinking?  You don't want 10 bridesmaids here and you don't want to host someone else's "get ready" party."  Of course, she hasn't mentioned it again now - because she thought this should be no big deal, having everyone over, until it turns out it's going to cost her money to do it.  We'll see what happens - we're still trying to get the booking straightened out since it's in her name but her sister and brother-in-law are probably going to stay here.  

Thank you for the reminder to stay the course and keep honest  to your own rules!  

[Farah1]

@Alice-and-Jeff0 you are welcome! I am curious to know how it is workingo out with charging the fee. This crossed my mind before... for example, charging a fee for early luggage drop/early check-in, late check-out, and more. However, I decided that I do not want to do that as it might not always work and might just give a trouble for me. 🙂

[Alice-and-Jeff0]

Will do @Farah1 - the reservation isn't until next May... we have a bit of time to work out the details!

[Alice-and-Jeff0]

We charge fees for lots of other things and that has never been a problem using the Resolution Center.  We charge Pet Fees, Laundry fees, Meals and Pantry access, extra cleanings, Postage fees, and shopping charges in this way.  We've toyed with charging for luggage holds or drop offs, but haven't quite gotten to pulling the trigger on this.  And while we haven't had to do this yet - everyone says no - we have decided if someone wants early check in and we have the night before free - we "charge" an early check in fee of whatever the price is the night before rounded down to the nearest $5 and block the night before on their behalf.  

[Farah1]

@Alice-and-Jeff0 so you charge the extras after they check-out through resolution center? Did anybody ever declined to pay when you sent the claim?

[Sam-and-Adam0]

@Alice-and-Jeff0 I'd love to know the outcome of your now third-party booking + breaking house rules + extra guests (happening after booking but before reservation dates)... I just had the absolute worst Airbnb experience with that exact situation (after so many positives)... and I'm still not sure how all that is supposed to be handled. Thanks!

[Alice-and-Jeff0]

@Sam-and-Adam0 - We're giving her a few days to get the third-party booking rearranged - her sister, for whom she made the reservation,  is currently traveling on vacation.  We're going to follow up tomorrow - if she doesn't have a plan, I'm going start the process of cancelling the reservation.  If it gets cancelled - well, I won't have to go down the path for even discussing the bridesmaid thing.  If I do, my intention is to make it not so very cost-effective to have a party here.  Plus I've already told her there would be an additional charge to use the master bathroom and have the extra people over, so after a few more days, she's probably rethinking this plan.  10 women getting ready in a 2-bath home isn't ideal.  And I haven't even asked if she plans to have the photographer here too.  Will keep you in the loop as I know more.