Guest gave inaccurate private feedback to ABB

[Paul-and-Trina0]

Hey Guys,
We could really use some feedback from the community as ABB has notified us of our guest’s private feedback to them…which is Completely inaccurate! It's almost like he was looking for something negative to say behind our backs, although I don't know why as we thought we had a great experience. I don't think he realized that ABB would notify us. I’m unsure how to proceed and could really use some advice as we are very new at hosting and have only just encountered this situation and are very protective of our reputation. Note: we have 2 bedrooms listed in our private home and have never had less than 5 star ratings.

Conversation Key: ABB is underlined. Guest is italicized. (I am in parentheses)

(His public feedback): I highly recommend this place provided you want to relax and decompress. These are the best host I have ever met. Let me put it in this way -- even I can't be a host like them. The only thing to keep in mind is their house is around 10 miles from heart of the city. A perfect location to relax. Another thing to note is in evening there are no street lights so you must have a car or capability to uber otherwise you won't be able to walk to even closest restaurant. I am sure they would not mind to accommodate you but if you are like me who doesn't like to be burden on people make sure you have a car. Next time I plan my trip to Reno I am going to make sure they have a vacancy for me. Thanks.

(To clarify, our neighborhood is Well Lit! It’s the highway down the road that is not.)

 And his private feedback: “Thanks very much. I enjoyed my stay with you guys.”

(While his overall public rating is 5 Star, his private ratings to ABB are as follows):

ABB: Private feedback

 This is just for you. It won’t appear on your listing or profile.

Private Feedback: 
Thanks very much. I enjoyed my stay with you guys.

Accuracy feedback: (He gave us 4 STARS)
Your guest mentioned some issues that weren’t accurately reflected in your listing description: amenities. Additional comments: “They said there will be light breakfast and snacks. Which wasn't there.”.

    (His ABB message communication to us prior to staying copied here): “I am vegetarian so you don't have to worry about my food/breakfast etc. If I can store something in your fridge it would be great so I don't have to go out everyday.”

(We provide bagels and muffins as well as coffee and tea 100% of the time every morning. He refused this offer. Note: Nowhere in our listing does it say we provide snacks.)

Location feedback: (He gave us 4 STARS)
“This place is little away from Reno city. It was great for me to read and relax but if you like to party its not ideal. ”

   (His ABB Message communication to us copied here): “Hello Sir and Madam, am planning a reading vacation where I just want to relax and read in nature and if weather is not nice then in house. Would I be able to close my room and read? To avoid your pets? I am planning to read 5 books in 4 days so I might be having different schedule like read till 4 am and get up at 11 am.”

 (Our listing Clearly states: “While our home is in the Reno city limits we are on the outskirts of town in the Golden Valley area with easy access to the freeway.  You cannot walk to the downtown area and will need a car or other transportation (Taxi/Uber). We are very conveniently located off US 395 North.  Our home is 10 miles from the Reno-Tahoe Airport (Mapquest says 12 minutes), 9 miles to downtown Reno (13 minutes) and 9 miles to downtown Sparks (12 minutes).”

And again it’s mentioned: “We are located in Golden Valley, approximately 10 miles (Or less) from the Reno/Tahoe airport, and downtown Reno and Sparks areas.  We do not have a bus line nearby so you will need a car or other transportation.“)

 (Also, our guest Did have a car with which to get around.)

Value: (He gave us 4 STARS!)

(Privately he told us we were at the PERFECT price and wants to book in the near future!

Our prices are much less than most of the other listings in our area simply Because we are on the outskirts of town. He also has asked if he can stay with us again due to his financial undertakings in our area and wants to pre-book and block out as many days as he wishes. If our Value is less than 5 Stars why in the world would he wish to book with us again?!)

(Check in, Cleanliness and Communication were a 5 Stars)

 ___________________________________________________________________________________________

And finally, this man informed us that he is a man of great stature and financial means. He was looking at million dollar properties in our area of which we spent 8 hours driving him through 4 counties looking for investment property. My husband even took a day off in order to assist him. We also hooked him up with 3 realtor friends of ours who dropped everything at his insistance to meet with him immediately. We went Over and Above for him as we do for all our guests, and yet he privately messaged ABB different ratings than he gave publically; as if ABB wouldn’t notify us. I feel as if we have been slapped in the face and our generosity has been disrespected.

In conclusion, we are very new to hosting as we started on Sept 1, 2017. Within a couple of weeks we met the Super Host requirements and have never had less than 5 Stars. Yes, I’m offended and butthurt! This is our first downgrade rating and it feels ugly.  I do realize that giving us 4 stars won’t do anything to our overall rating and Super Host status (soon to be declared) but my issue is that while he publically posted one thing he went behind our backs to ABB and said something completely different. We were expecting him to stay with us again as my husband is acting as his liaison with the realtors. But this back door message has me pretty miffed and I don't know if I want him back!

So…

-Do we confront him on this in an ABB private message? If so...suggestions?

-Do we respond publically where ABB gives us the option to respond? Probably not the best option.

-Do we contact ABB privately with this information to provide accuracy for maintain our stellar reputation?

I can’t see ingoring this and letting it just go by the wayside as we are continuing contact with him in a business sense and he plans to stay with us again. He has damaged his own reputation with us at this point and may have damaged future bookings with us.

I could really use the Community’s feedback on this. TIA!

Trina~

[Paul-and-Trina0]

Thank you @Lisa658, you have expressed my feelings to a Tee! We are not desperate for guests nor do we feel obligated to go over and above for Anyone. But this one gentleman seemed different and therefore we volunteered our assistance willingly. But we certainly don't need a repeat performance by booking him again! And he Will be booking with our neighbors as he is coming back to our area, and to not dispute his claims seems to set our neighbors up as potential victims. Whatever I decide to say will be short, sweet, and respectful to all. Thank you again for your feedback!

[Fred13]

Talking about hipocrisy. Like others have said, you two sound like very kind people, with a strong sense of morality. What they said in private has no bearing. They do come across as users, the last type most hosts would want to see again, or become further involved with in any shape or form. Next.

[Paul-and-Trina0]

Thank you for your input @Fred13. Hipocrisy is one of my pet peeves and probably why I've taken it so personally...

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

@Paul-and-Trina0 do not reply publicly on his private review and there is no sense to contact ABB privatly about it . Would you tell him in private message what do you think about his ratings or not is up to you, it depends if you want him back or not. As others advised - you can also block him from booking your place again.

I understand your feelings and I would advise you the same as others already did - do not go over and beyond for your guests, you will be hurt again. Set some boundaries about what you do offer and what you don't ... at least not for free. It is bussiness, they are your customers.. not your friends.

[Paul-and-Trina0]

Thank you, I appreciate your feedback @Branka-and-Silvia0!

[David126]

Nobody reads it, well you did, ignore and move on.

You can block him from rebooking.

[Paul-and-Trina0]

It was actually ABB who notified us that his complaint was contrary to what our listing states as well as contridictory to his public rating. Our reputation with ABB is primary and feel it's important to respond to them. As for blocking him, I don't think it's appropriate to do so without stating why we will not be booking him in the future. But I sure Like the idea! 😉
Thank you so much for the feedback!

[Phuong7]

We had similiar thing happen to us. We just ignored as they gave a great review. We are also new to hosting since this summer. However I think you and your husband are already doing too much and if he is already inconsiderate to you in that way I don't think helping him in the future would only lead to trouble (as per your husband helping him find real estate). Your airbnb appears to be doing just fine, you do not need to accept individuals like this. This is your home remember, it's okay to say no when it's warranted. 

[Paul-and-Trina0]

Thank you for your feedback @Phuong7. No, we certainly don't need this type of guest nor are we in a position where we Need the rooms filled. We don't have difficulty saying No and actually vollunteered our assistance to this gentleman. But we've found that 1st time ABB users do not go over very well as they have not had time to "value" the experience. 
Again, I appreciate your feedback! 🙂 

[Susie5]

@Paul-and-Trina0, on paper it all looks like you got on great with him... so I'd just let it go. Most of us have had a similar experience where guests say one thing to your face and write another.  Best advice is to let it go and if he ever contacts you again, you can say how disappointed you were that he was unfair in his review of your place and that you aren't willing to host him again. 

In fact that would be the best reason not to block him - let him try to book again as he says he will, and then have a quiet word with him about how unwelcome he is! HAH! take that!! Susie 🙂

[Paul-and-Trina0]

Thank you so much for your feedback @Susie5! I think you hit the nail on the head!

[David126]

Does ask the question about relationship, I have never thought in those terms, yes I have received auto generated emails not sure I would consider that was a relationship.

They are an online bookin service that I use.

[Gordon0]

Move on, it's yesterday's news. 
But please don't suggest "mental illness" is to blame, it's inappropriate. 

[City-Limits-Ranch0]

@Paul-and-Trina0  this type of situation is the hardest thing for us when hosting.  We have the guests we love and the guests love us (repeat visitors, glowing reviews, special offers, dinner on Saturday night, take their child for a pony ride, etc.)  Then we have the guests we intensely dislike and the feeling is mutual, but they did nothing to break rules, no specific issue to ding them on.  The guests we dislike, but they love our place . . . the guests we adore but their review is lukewarm . . . the guests we enjoyed and their review was 'weird' to say the least. 

The positive reviews with the negative private feedback.  The negative reviews (not many) with the guest immediately requesting another stay.  The people who blissfully and unconsciously broke every house rule that they could find but they were the sweetest, nicest people we ever met.  The nice woman with the huge untrained dog that clawed down the miniblinds but happily paid for replacement.  The reservation for two that turned into four a half hour before arrival, the change didn't go through the website (it doesn't like changes done after the reservation starts) but they apologetically paid in a resolution request a month later. 

The guy whose old beat up pickup got a scratch on it from my puppy.  The woman who booked a stay on a ranch, with dogs and horses but was terrified of dogs.  The couple with a baby who mentioned that there were bugs . . . on a ranch . . . with horses.  The nice guy who booked for one and arrived with a girlfriend, didn't accept the change request (most likely never saw it because of that website glitch about changes after the reservation starts) but left an amazing review and said he will be back (he is welcome but I will ask about the number of guests when I accept the reservation.)

I just had one of our less pleasant guests stay twice (several days apart.)  Consumed all the mini juice drinks in the fridge. Messy. Drove recklessly on our shared driveway (we have a sign asking people not to run over our dogs.) Her little dogs barked hysterically every time I got home from work at 9 pm yet she was the one who complained about 'noise.' Multiple requests, cancellations, rebookings. Left a review that was as lukewarm (without being overtly hostile) as you can imagine.  Negative private feedback that was all weirdly untrue from our point of view.  That person has 35 glowing reviews, many from multiple stays.  Hmmm.  Perception is everything.  Her perception of our place was poor and our perception of her was equally poor yet there was nothing exactly that would "stand up in court."  I don't trust her or want her back, ever.  I wrote a neutral review (she didn't do anything too egregious), gave Airbnb detailed private feedback (to Airbnb only for future reference, not to the guest) and blocked her. 

People are weird.  That is all.

[Carol-Lee1]

I would totally ignore it.  If he was otherwise a good guest, you can decide if you want to host him again, but the star system is so flawed it's not worth getting upset over.  Many guests give stars with the idea that they are valuing for others and not for themselves.  If he wanted to read and relax, he got what he asked for, but he might think to give 4 stars for location because he thinks he is rating your place for someone who doesn't want to relax.  Its complicated.  If he didn't want breakfast then for him it was perfect, but for someone else who expected breakfast, it would be 4 stars...see?  He really wasn't rating for himself.  If he wants to book again I would explain that you hope he rates his stay for himself only and not for what he thinks others might think of your place.