Guest has complained from arriving

[Nicola2231]

My guest arrived today, late and said she couldn’t find the house, I had sent simple directions and photo of house. I told her she was 2 mins away she turned up an hr later, saying she was fuming and thought I should have picked her up. 
I showed her room and bathroom, she said didn’t like shower over bath, asked me how she was supposed to eat if I don’t do meals.  The village is 5 min walk with shops restaurants, takeaways, pubs etc. this went on for an hr, I kept saying I had to go and make an important call to get away. I’m gutted and in bed now as it really is a stunning room and bathroom, I put coffee tea hot choc biscuits etc in room with kettle which isn’t even advertised, it’s a good gesture. I’m dreading the morning already as I know she will start again. I’m a super host and everyone is happy here. 

[Anonymous]

@Nicola2231   What a stinker. Sorry you've gotten such a worthless, miserable guest.

In my experience, there is nothing to gain from completing a stay when it's clear that the guest is unhappy with things that can't simply be fixed. If it's just a one-night stay, I guess just treat yourself to a glass of wine and sleep it off. But any longer and it's just not worth it to be dreading your next interaction. You can take control of the situation by preparing a booking alteration request,  advancing the guest's scheduled checkout date to tomorrow, and noting that all the remaining nights will only be fully refunded if she accepts the request. It's hard to get the tone just right on a thorny interaction like this, but I tend to take something from the breakup playbook like:  

"It's clear that this stay isn't working out for either of us, so please accept this as a chance to find accommodation that better suits your needs. Thank your for your cooperation. Your checkout time is tomorrow at 10 AM."

The guest will probably write a whiny negative review regardless of whether you let her complete the booking, but your response will have more credibility if it's clear to the reader that the guest was so bad she had to be removed. 

[Nicola2231]

Thankyou for the advice, I didn’t know we could do that.  Will see if she’s calm tomorrow and go from there.  

[Anonymous]

@Nicola2231   You can always request a change to the booking (dates, number of guests, etc) but it has to be bilaterally agreed in order to go through without actually cancelling. But even if the guest declines the offer, it still gets the message across that you are done with their complaints. 

It could be that the guest was just having a really bad day, but I'm not optimistic about tomorrow being better. She's clearly not capable of independent travel if she can't follow simple directions, won't read a listing carefully enough to know what amenities it offers, and expects her Airbnb host to take responsibility for her meals. This person needs to go back home to her parents or whatever facility she's been living in pronto.

[Huma0 · Accepted solution]

@Nicola2231 

I am sorry you've got this unappreciative guest. I have experienced this type of guest and that sinking feeling you get when they show up and you realise nothing you can do is going to make them happy. 

I pretty much agree with @Anonymous 's advice. If it is a very short stay, take a deep breath as it will be over soon. If it's longer, maybe it is better to be rid of this guest or at least set the boundaries. Whenever I have been in this situation and thought I will just ride through it and try to make the guest happier, I have almost always regretted it. Some people are impossible to please.

[Jennifer1897]

@Nicola2231 I am sorry that you are dealing with that. We have all gone through the difficult or impossible to please guest. 

I know it's hard not to feel bad when someone is unhappy about the listing, but she had unrealistic expectations. I looked at both your listings and no where does it say meals are provided and your photos' offer a fair picture of the space they are booking.  Some people just fail to read/look at the entirety of listings or they just expect things to come with it. 

I tend to agree with Andrew. Guest who start out on a negative foot often just continue downward. You will end up stressing yourself out trying to appease her or just deal with her negativity in general.  At this point the review is likely already set in stone for her.  Another approach I take is asking guest about relocating nicely, something like "I am sorry the accommodation was not a good fit, perhaps we can contact airbnb and they can help you relocate to a place that better suites your needs (aka unrealistic expectations)" 

Hope everything works out

[Nicola2231]

Thankyou,she’s here for 4 nights, it is a horrible feeling when you’ve done your best.  

[Huma0]

@Nicola2231 @Jennifer1897 

I had a similar situation with a couple who stayed a few years ago. After the booking was accepted, the lady informed me that she was having a parcel sent to my address ahead of the stay so could I look out for it. I reminded her politely that my house rules (which she had said she had read) state no mail and no packages. I asked her to please read through the listing again.

It was at this point that she asked me which meals were included as she couldn't find that on the listing. There are no meals included, not even breakfast. The listing clearly states tea, coffee, sugar etc. i.e. the basics. She didn't mention it again, but it was clear the whole time they were here that she was deeply resentful of the fact that they had to buy their own food, let alone cook it. When I tried to show her around the kitchen, she told me flatly that they never cook at home so they certainly were not going to cook while here, yet they never went out for dinner once in their eight day stay in London. 

I don't know if the amount of strong coffee and sugar they consumed added to their nerves, but they went through an insane amount of it (much more than all my guests combined would use in a couple of months). It's like they thought they must use as much as possible of what was included. This lady also went through my own food cupboards and moved stuff from there into the cupboard where I leave stuff for the guests. 

There were other issues with these guests, e.g. they turned up hours after the agreed check in time without letting me know, had switched off their phones so I couldn't contact them, ignored my clear directions, got lost (well, not really because they were standing right outside my house stopping strangers in the street) and arrived already angry about that, but I believe it was the lack of meals that really irked them.

This lady had the highest number of reviews (all positive) that I had seen for a guest at that time. I foolishly did not read the reviews she had left for the hosts. I wish I had because it became clear that, whenever breakfast or other food was provided, she was delighted, but where it wasn't, she left nit picking, negative reviews. When she reviewed the airbnb they stayed in after mine, she mentioned, "There was a kitchen we could use but we had to buy our own food," as if that was an unusual thing. The host did not write anything negative. Her review as simply, "okay", which based on the reviews she had left for her other guests, I could easily interpret as "not okay". I'm pretty sure that stay didn't go well either. 

Some people are entitled to the point of delusion.

[Anonymous]

@Huma0   I'd be really tempted to grill this guest on how she developed the idea that Airbnb rentals included complete meal service. There are still homestays in many parts of the world that offer full board, but I have yet to see any overlap between those and the Silicon Valley booking platforms. It's a real blind spot, actually - those hosts who happen to be brilliant chefs, like Ashoka in Sri Lanka, would really thrive on being able to offer culinary stays as a category, but they're undersold on websites that are just hawking rooms. 

Now, anyone dumb enough to assume their Airbnb host was going to feed them meals that weren't offered in the listing probably wouldn't find such a category even if it existed. And it's not really a thing I'd offer in a location that has plenty of restaurants. But there is still some untapped demand for full-board homestays and guesthouses, and it would be nice to have that as a search filter.

[Huma0]

@Anonymous 

Yes, it would be interesting to know and something I probably should have asked the guests mentioned above, but they were so hostile and grumpy, I just didn't want to go there!

I can definitely see that there is a market for full board accommodation, or even half board, which would be more practical if guests are out and above seeing the sights during the day. This is a category that would make sense (unlike grand pianos). 

However, it could get a bit complicated in terms of legal requirements, health and safety regulations etc. if you are charging guests for catering. In a lot of places, one would be required to have a licence and health and safety inspections and I wonder how many airbnbs, homestay or otherwise, would be able to meet these requirements.

I actually love to cook and, while I'm no professional chef, am not bad at it at all. There are a few things that put me off even offering breakfast though. One is the legal implications mentioned above. Another is the time and commitment involved. The third is the number of food allergies, intolerances, preferences etc. that so many people seem to have these days. Even offering milk has become a minefield! At the end of the day though, I am minutes away from cafes, restaurants, take aways, pubs and supermarkets. 

Still, I am sure there are listings and hosts that are very well set up for it and it's certainly something I would seriously consider if my listing was located somewhere with limited dining options or limited transportation to get to them and especially if there was great local produce to be enjoyed.

[Anonymous]

Fair point about the regulations, though flouting local laws is baked into Airbnb's business model.

I offered breakfast when I was still a newbie, and cut it out after a few months it for all the reasons you mention. The final straw came when a German guest complained because he had to eat his breakfast alone (I set it out for him before leaving for work). I think he imagined that he'd be staying in Fräulein Schroeder's boarding house from the Isherwood novellas, which would be cool for another host to recreate in Berlin, but it's a full century out of date. I've shared meals with many guests, but as a gesture of friendship rather than as a hosting duty.

Totally agree that offering ordinary meals only makes the most sense in remote locations. But foodies will plan whole trips around extraordinary dining experiences, and when there's lodging attached, that is where they'll stay.

[Amanda660]

@Nicola2231 how old is this guest and how long is she booked for? 

[Nicola2231]

She is 70, and here for four night. 

[Claire2428]

** Some people are the most entitled and biggest complainers, in my experience. 

**[Content edited in line with the Community Center Guidelines to avoid generalisation.] 

[Kate867]

@Nicola2231   I am so sorry this happened to you.  Frequently guests simply do not read all the details of listings prior to booking and then find upon arrival that it was not what they really wanted.  Given the age of your guest it is also possible that she was quite tired by the time she managed to find your home and could well have taken her frustration out on you, something that she may well regret now.  Some of us simply get grumpy and say things that we normally would not when stressed and tired.  Hopefully after a good nights sleep she will now feel refreshed and a bit happier.  I agree with suggestions made by @Anonymous and @Huma0 , If she is still not happy then offer her the option of cancelling her stay with a refund for remaining nights and perhaps help her to find alternative accommodation more suitable to her needs.