Just a vent.

[Laura2592]

 A general vent. I am about emotionally labored out.

This past weekend was my birthday. I have a day job which is stressful but I took the week off to travel to our New Orleans place/stay at our ABB after work was completed. I have an online business selling antique fine jewelry as a hobby (pretty well established at this point) and we have the cottage/deal with guests as all of you do too.

Online jewelry business had a message up that I would not be as responsive as I was traveling, and shipping would be delayed until a certain day. OF COURSE I had someone with a complete meltdown. She bought a relatively expensive 100 year old piece without reading the description. Then she proceeded to message me 5-10 times a day with various questions and concerns about the item-- things that were either fully disclosed in the description she didn't read, or imaginary issues she thought she could see from poring over the pictures and video. I finally canceled the sale and refunded her money with a polite message, knowing that this was likely to end up with even more drama, and frankly not wanting to ruin my free time answering her copious bizarre questions. She thanked me at first,  but then spent the next several days sending me rambling messages at 3am her time that I "stole" the item from her, that she had "financed it and you knew that! I won't get my money back for WEEKS" (I have no control whatsoever over this) and that I "ruined her life." Oy. Asked her not to contact me again, sent her to spam where she likely continues these diatribes.

Over the weekend when I was celebrating with family I had an inquiry for booking dates at our cottage which are not available; booked to someone else ages ago. The guest sent the following:

"Hi- I see you have X dates blocked and I am wondering if you would be open to asking those individuals if they would trade with me. I have an event I forgot about in the area and can't find a place to stay. I am willing to pay them double for the inconvenience. Can you share their contact info? Thank you!"

I explained nicely that I can't give out guest info (especially to someone who seems to have just joined ABB and does not have a fully filled in profile) and wished them luck finding something else in the area. I even went so far as to search and locate a few other hosts who had opening for their days. They responded:

"I don't think you understood me. I want to stay at your cottage on those days. Make it happen. As I said I am happy to pay double."

Again, this is a much needed vacation week for me. I don't have time for this nonsense. So I just said "I am sorry I can't help with this. I wish you luck finding something else." To which this person said "Thanks for nothing. This ruins my entire month." 

What on earth has happened to people? I am so burnt out with them. And apparently ruining their lives left and right!

[Sarah977]

@Laura2592  Happy Birthday. My daughter's birthday was the 13th.

That Airbnb message is outrageous. I would actually report that guest. And I would not have been able to be as professionally detached as you were in your response to them. I probably would have responded, "I don't care if you're willing to pay ten times more, I don't take orders from guests, I don't cancel confirmed reservations, I don't give out private contact info of guests, and I don't accept bookings from rude people."

I hate to say it, but from what I read daily in the news, rudeness, entitlement, and even violence when people don't get their way, seems to be the accepted norm in the US now among a large segment of the population. I'm surprised they stopped short of death threats for "ruining their life".

[Laura2592]

@Sarah977 Happy bday to your daughter. Mine was yesterday.

Its disturbing. There seems to be lack of understanding that any vendor or business provider reserves the right to refuse service. I don't have to have you as my guest if you are rude. I don't have to sell you my item if you are unreasonable. I get to choose who I deal with, what the terms are and why I might not want to accommodate you. I learned long ago that passing on a difficult transaction by was a much better solution than bending over backwards for someone with unrealistic expectations. I don't need anyone's money that badly. 

But recently it seems that saying "No, I can't help with this. Best of luck finding something elsewhere." is tantamount to a slur. People get deeply disturbed and act out. Its exhausting. 

[Deb216]

@Laura2592 

[Laura2592]

@Deb216 I remember seeing this article 🙂 Good to know that I am not alone but still...

[Kitty-and-Creek0]

@Laura2592 

Hang in there, this is just outrageous. 

@Sarah977 

Exactly!

[Emilia42]

@Laura2592 

What the heck?! Who are these people and why do you get some many of them?! Your post makes me remember an experience I had when I worked Reservations at a high end hotel. A man called to book one night but we had a 2 night minimum for the weekend. I told him No, I’m sorry, his stay would need to be for 2 nights. He freaked out. I mean, I have never heard anyone yell like this before. He was swearing at me and personally attacking me. I just sat there, shocked. At one point I held the phone away from my ear and my coworkers and I listened to him scream and scream for multiple minutes. It was insane. He did end up booking with one of the shift leaders. But when the owner got word of what had happened the next day, he personally called the man, canceled his stay, and told him to never contact the hotel again. Of course, this man was a sweetheart and apologetic to him.

[Mark116]

@Laura2592   It is weird.  In your Airbnb case, the guy admits himself that it is HIS OWN FAULT for 'forgetting' an event, but he manages to twist things around to make it your fault for not moving heaven and earth to meet his exact needs, because...he.will.pay.extra!  People, especially Americans, are unhinged and have lost all sense of decorum and it is getting worse all the time.

The jewelry woman might be on some spectrum or other or possibly lonely, but same behavior. Her own  failure to read the description and then freaking out about details [plus, 5-10 emails a day for more than one day over a piece of jewelry is nuts], and yet she turns it all around and blames you, first for her concerns over the purchase and then, after you 'heard' those concerns and relieved her of the stress of the purchase by a full refund, is still not happy.

Although we don't get the same type of guest as you--both because our price is more budget friendly and no one stays at our apartment for the experience of the apartment itself-- I'm still looking forward to Jan and Feb which is our low low season.

[Mike-And-Jane0]

@Laura2592 Can I just thank you for taking on all the kooks. For whatever reason they seem attracted to you/your listing thus protecting the rest of us.

[Laura2592]

@Mike-And-Jane0 seems that way, right??

When I was a little girl my gran would always tell me about the evil eye (or, as she was Sicilian, they called it il Malocchio.) She had a charm she would make us wear. Supposedly its caused by envy. I never believed in it, but hey, she had good stories and swore it was a real thing. Now as I put things into the world that I love and want to share, I am realizing that they may also be things some  people covet.  I find that I am more and more a target for really outrageous behavior. Its getting to the point where I can't even have much needed downtime. Maybe its time to revisit some of gran's protective items. Something is definitely happening. This is not normal. I am not rude or nasty. I have good boundaries. I work hard. Something has to give.

[Pat271]

I always worry that unhinged people like this may go as far as to threaten harm to me or my family. Has never happened and it’s probably a bit paranoid, but stuff like this makes me very uncomfortable. Sorry for the emotional turmoil this has caused you, Laura.

[Anonymous]

@Laura2592   Happy birthday, fellow Scorpio! I hope you find the time to have some nice unplugged time away from work - for some reason, the most rotten encounters tend to be the ones that follow you into your vacation. 

The whole past year I've withdrawn from most of the public-facing work I've done my whole adult life, and retreated into back-end stuff, mostly because everywhere I look it seems like nearly everyone has completely lost their shiznit. The craziest thing is to think that this horrible inquiry you had might have come from someone who was reasonably well-adjusted in 2019. "Make it happen," seriously...did this person binge-watch too many Scorsese films during quarantine, because he sure sounds like someone who's certain he's just about to get made.

[Marie6762]

Thanks for the wonderfully morbid humor- dark times require it.  And any excuse to watch a scene from GF!

[Kelly149]

@Laura2592  At least the jewelry business lets you block people. The whole “failure to plan (read) on your part, does NOT constitute an emergency on my part” seems appropriate. 

of course, I can feel sassy bc my space has been off-line since May. I dread the idea of turning it back on. I still think you’re well within bounds to return some nonsense back at these folks. 
“The very idea!”

”I’ll look into that”

”Let me check with the boss”

”Do these tactics ever work?”

”no”

”Absolutely not”

”Good luck with your trip!”

”I’m sure you’ll figure something out!”

lots of ways to not say yes without saying no & also the only response time that gets counted is the very first message

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

@Kelly149  or, as Airbnb CS use to say.... " someone will call you back..." 😄 😄 😄